The Truth

[houdini]

The truth,

 

The truth is, she didn't want me anymore. The truth is she felt that I was not important enough to keep in her life anymore. I try and find ways arround this truth but there is no way arround it. I have spent the last 3 months trying to find an excuse to hold on, to have hope, to find any bit of hope or clue that maybe she'll come back. The truth is, she isn't coming back. As hard as that is to accept Im trying my best to understand this and accept it. The truth? the sad truth is I still love her and always will. The truth is, she doesn't feel the same, the truth is no matter how hard I try I can't change her mind, the truth is all I have is me.

 

It's a hard pill to swallow "the truth" but I really have no choice and I need to stop making excuses for this breakup and accept that it's over. A good friend told me "You can have hope, there is nothing wrong with having hope, but have hope in yourself that life will be better than what I ever imagined it would be" I'm starting to believe this, slowly but surely. For now my hope lies in the hands of my ex and I'm trying my hardest to take that hope away from her and put it back in me.

 

 

Thanks for letting me ramble for a second, and thanks to all my family here at enotalone, I would have gone off the deep end if it weren't for all of you here.

 

Houdini

[Dubb]

Good for you man. It's not easy to let go but you have to. Things have a way of turing around trust me. My ex blew me off for good last week and last night i met an awesome girl. We already have plans for next week. Things always come into our lives when we need them most. Just stay positive and you will see.

[houdini]

Thank you dubb.

 

I appreciate your words. I don't know if I'm ready to meet anyone yet, I've tried but I compare anyone I meet to my ex. I know it will take time to get through this. For the most part what I feel right now is anger and some hurt, mostly anger because of how selfish my ex has become to disregard the kids feelings in the breakup and only look out for her own selfish happiness. She left because she lost feelings for me and fell out of love, blamed me for everthing and left me with our dreams to follow her own with possibly someone else. It seem so unfair but what can I do, right?

[HealingHandsWarmHeart]

you said one thing that you should change your thinking on ... your hope does not lie in the hands of your ex.

 

think about what you are saying.. you are saying there is no hope for the relationship..then the next paragraph you say that the very person there is no hope with is holding your hope in their hands... don't give her that power!

 

there is always hope and it lies in your hands!! =)

[curbie]

Houdini

 

I can relate 100% to how you feel. Try your best to stay busy, work out, get in shape, go for walks, something...anything...Trust me on this...it will get better for you and your feelings will change. I read your post and you remind me of who I used to be 3 or 4 years ago about an ex g/f of mine. Take care buddy!

[sneaker]

I know what you're going through, houdini. It's hard, it's really, really hard. You think you're in something for the long run and boom, the bottom drops right out from under you. You're so hopeful about opportunities, chances, possibilities. You hang on to perceived slivers of reciprocation from the other person.

 

Don't worry, or at least know that worrying will help about as much as chewing bubble gum can help solve an algebra problem. (Credit to Baz Luhrman on that one.) You will feel better, you will heal.

[Wandering_Sword]

Its good to ramble sometimes. Gets things off the chest and clears the head for more important stuff like eating and getting a life

I'm glad that you're posting here instead of having a "brain fart" and contacting the ex (oh man do I remember those days).

Keep up the good work, you have come a long way!

[Bada-Bing]

Know how you feel, good for you to come to the decision you have...cause there are some of us out here that havent made it even that far.