ghost69 Posted April 10, 2007 Share Posted April 10, 2007 awww.. but then this is why we get guys coming to ENA with posts like "i asked a girl out, but she didn't even respond to me!" and then everyone will say "well she sounds like a a rude cow!" ( which the OP isn't!) If I asked someone out, and he responded with 'no thanks' I would respect him for answering. The complaing I hear so often from my female friends is "Why didn't he even answer.. I would have at least liked to know!" i think that is the difference. a lot of women get hung up and need an answer for everything. not me. i don't get a response, i understand and move on. i don't need to wonder why or if or wth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teach-me Posted April 10, 2007 Share Posted April 10, 2007 i think that is the difference. a lot of women get hung up and need an answer for everything. not me. i don't get a response, i understand and move on. i don't need to wonder why or if or wth. that's one up on a lot of us... good on ya. I'm definitely the curious type. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shikashika Posted April 10, 2007 Share Posted April 10, 2007 i think that is the difference. a lot of women get hung up and need an answer for everything. not me. i don't get a response, i understand and move on. i don't need to wonder why or if or wth. Seriously, I admire people who can do this! My biggest problem after a relationship doesn't work out is .''but why why why why? especially when I don't get an answer.. which has been virtually 100% of the time in the past! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rnorth Posted April 10, 2007 Share Posted April 10, 2007 I appreciate ghost69's perspective but my upbringing is to be straight forward and polite and expect the same. thereforeeee I appreciate the advice put forward by friscodj who often has a level-headed and decent approach to these matters (as do Batya33 and Annie). I like your response Cassie. You showed respect not only for your own boundaries but for the gentleman in particular. Actions like these always reflect positively on all parties involved. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghost69 Posted April 10, 2007 Share Posted April 10, 2007 I appreciate ghost69's perspective but my upbringing is to be straight forward and polite and expect the same. thereforeeee I appreciate the advice put forward by friscodj who often has a level-headed and decent approach to these matters (as do Batya33 and Annie). I like your response Cassie. You showed respect not only for your own boundaries but for the gentleman in particular. Actions like these always reflect positively on all parties involved. i never expect anything from anyone. you are setting yourself up for bad things this way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scout Posted April 10, 2007 Share Posted April 10, 2007 i never expect anything from anyone. you are setting yourself up for bad things this way. That may be, but it seems to me what you were espousing the poster do here was to just be plain discourteous. At any rate, I do not think it's healthy to expect so little from people. Have a little more positivity, ghost! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghost69 Posted April 11, 2007 Share Posted April 11, 2007 i expect someone to put forth effort if they want to be with me. i always think positive scout. but i don't get all huffy puffy that someone doesn't do what i want to. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scout Posted April 11, 2007 Share Posted April 11, 2007 Well, all I can say is if I wrote a nice email like that to someone and they never even bothered to respond, my feelings would be hurt. I do not put that in the same category as getting "huffy puffy," lol. On the other hand, if they responded back with a polite thanks, but this isn't something they are interested in, I would be disappointed - and yes, perhaps a tad embarrassed. But if I got angry at them, that would be huffy puffy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dating Coach Posted April 11, 2007 Share Posted April 11, 2007 are you agreeing with this? because I think one can still tell the truth, and be polite about it, like friscodj mentioned! I think we have all been on the receiving end of someone giving us some crap excuse.. which we know could just be a made-up response! No I was not agreeing with it. I was pointing out to the guys on here that by this girls post you can see that ACTIONS speak louder than WORDS. She basically just said to make up some excuse like, "I've got a boyfriend" or "I'm not ready a relationship at the moment" to turn this guy down. I was showing the guys on here that girls will make up those excuses when they do not want to date you. thereforeeee you are better off paying attention to actions rather than words, just like I've been saying all along. I agree with you that it would be better to simply express that you are not interested in dating that person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dating Coach Posted April 11, 2007 Share Posted April 11, 2007 she doesn't owe him anything. just don't respond. i'm sure he is grown and can take a hint. Unfortunately even silence isn't enough to give a lot of guys "the hint". A lot of guys are very dense about this sort of things and will continue to try to speak with the girl in some shape or form. Just yesterday I was reading a thread on here where a guy found this girls myspace after she'd already ignored him and told the principal on him for staring at her. i think that is the difference. a lot of women get hung up and need an answer for everything. not me. i don't get a response, i understand and move on. i don't need to wonder why or if or wth. With all due respect Ghost, this isn't about just you. YOU may take the hint but there are a ton of guys out there that wont. thereforeeee I agree with being honest about letting the guy know that you're not interested at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghost69 Posted April 11, 2007 Share Posted April 11, 2007 Unfortunately even silence isn't enough to give a lot of guys "the hint". A lot of guys are very dense about this sort of things and will continue to try to speak with the girl in some shape or form. Just yesterday I was reading a thread on here where a guy found this girls myspace after she'd already ignored him and told the principal on him for staring at her. With all due respect Ghost, this isn't about just you. YOU may take the hint but there are a ton of guys out there that wont. thereforeeee I agree with being honest about letting the guy know that you're not interested at all. but you do understand that a lot of women need an answer for everything? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dating Coach Posted April 11, 2007 Share Posted April 11, 2007 Yeah, but such a general statement doesn't concern me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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