In this room

[Shiva 2007]

I posted this as part of another thread but I think it belongs here:

This I wrote to the one who once taught me a lot, and in the end taught me pain.

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In this room,

I explore my exising emotions.

 

In this room,

I learn to reach within and to reach out

 

In this room,

you teach me about my distorted senses,

about my habitual tunnel vision.

 

In this room,

you are showing me how I float through my emotions,

though never loosing my thirst of anchoring to the present.

 

In this room,

you guide me from fear to excitementy

you teach me to see fear as my friend,

a friend which allows me to say "I am".

 

In this room,

you make me laugh,

you make me panic,

you teach me to listen to my heartbeat,

you teach me to give value to my presense;

and to my yearning for passion.

 

In this room,

I learn to feel my frustration, my eagerness, my courage.

 

I wonder if you know,

how alive I feel when I am,

In this room.

......May 15, 1996

 

In this room,

I seek for love,

the love that is gone,

a lost heart,

no more words to say,

in its place a void,

just confusion,

all that is lelft is pain and sarrow,

all that was once there is gone,

I wish you well,

I wish you peace,

I wish no more lies,

I wish you no more harm,

In this room I feel alone,

the void you left is one I chose, for you and me.

Out of this room you go,

I remain....forever changed

in this room

March 7, 2007