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Young and panicky


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Sometimes I feel like the deck is stacked against me.

 

Most people would figure that I do very well with women. I'm a decent looking guy, and I'm smart and well off money-wise...and yet I don't do well at all when it comes to meeting people.

 

I'm a strong conservative, politically, and that alienates a large, perhaps overwhelming percentage of women my age. Furthermore, I'm an agnostic/atheist, and that alienates another large portion of the population, basically the conservative people who I would otherwise date. For too many people, it's an irreconcilable difference, and it really kills my list of people who are available to date.

 

And to make things worse, I'm picky. It's not even a purposeful thing. I'm just not attracted to many people, physically, though I can like most people personality-wise. I'm even willing to make sacrifices in order to meet somebody on my level, intellectually.

 

I just freak out sometimes because I really am at a time where I want to find someone to start a family with, and yet, I cannot. It's like everything I am precludes me from meeting someone in order to achieve that end. I know I am young, but I real feel that this is the proper age to start considering these things, I do not want to get embroiled within a career and then hopefully find time for the good things in life at a later age, I think that hurts people in the long run. I get real lonely thinking about it.

 

Is this a problem for anyone else?

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Well, I'm actually agnostic, but I lump myself in with the two groups. It makes it quite hard, IMHO. It worries the hell out of me. I know most people don't want to have anything to do with me, and it really really hurts. I just hope that someone may be cool with the way I am, but that's probably not possible.

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I'm serious, that's the reaction I get, sometimes. I've lost out on people simply because of how I voted.

 

To be honest, I wouldnt date a republican. Purely becuase I cannot fathom how someone could support such as evil as bush and it would make me question someones morals, ethics, values and their level of consideration for people unlike themselves.

 

It would also throw up issues to do with raising children and the like, if you were looking for a life-time partner.

(I dont want to start a political debate with this, thats my piece, I have said it, and nothing anyone says will make me think otherwise at this point in time.)

 

APART from that... I dont really know what to say. I am sure people get this problem. I take it you have tried looking outside your normal circles for possible girlfriends?

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No, no, no! you are not alone ! But of course I can understand how hard it can be to believe so just because you are a minority of the population to think like you do.

 

Have you some contacts made on internet ? At school ?

It is most unlikely to find people similar to you at work or in the street.

Use tools necessary to be successful and give yourself time and you will have some results.

 

What do you think about that ?

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I've always failed to see why how someone votes is such a big issue. As long as they don't try and force their opinions on anyone why should it matter? I don't vote at all. Never have. I don't see the point because, frankly, whoever gets in power is going to screw me over and do a rubbish job anyway. I don't care how people vote, much like I don't care what their religion is. As long as they don't try to force it all on me then whatever.

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The problem is you're picky. Drop it and take whatever.

 

Now, I dont agree with that.

 

NOT dating someone just becuase they have a snaggletooth or becuase they may have slept with "too many" people (haaha, just to refer to recent debate) is one thing...

 

But I dont think you should "take whatever"... I think you should hold out until you are sure they are right for you.

 

A family friend didnt get married until she was 40-somthing... and she is in the happiest relationship I have ever known... her brother said to me at the wedding "she waited a long time to find him"...

 

A good love is well worth the wait

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I see it as trying to find a parking space in a parking garage, while I'm running late for something. I could take the chance of passing up an empty space thats far from the elevator in hopes that I could find that space near the elevator. Its a risk to take, if I don't find one near the elevator then I have to go all the way around the garage and I'm late already. Or I could just take the first spot I see and just haul butt the rest of the way.

 

Point being, don't die lonely. That just sounds sad.

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A partner involves a bit more than a parking spot... some spots are next to wayward shopping carts, near a garbage dumpster or just have a lot of traffic...

 

Anyways, do you have to say you're a Republican? I can't say I've ever gotten into the political debate on the first date. You can still be Republican and not like Bush. You can talk about your views on stuff without aligning yourself with a very unpopular political figure.

 

I'm leaning NDP myself (Canadian) but I don't like Jack Layton much...

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Ha, it's not like that. I don't walk around with a George W. Bush sticker on my face. But it's impossible to avoid all political conversation, because I can tell people's political views just by simple conversation, and I can imagine it's the same way for other people. Who we are politically is a strong reflection of our personalities and backgrounds and it's hard to simply "hide" them for a long period of time.

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