trash mail Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 Do we look for the prefect mate or do we make a commitment and make do? What should we do? Is there a perfect partner? or do we make them into the prefect partner? Should we commit to the one and stop the search for the prefect partner and accept that the one we have chosen may not be the prefect one. Why is it the people continue to search for the perfect partner even when they are attached? I was told by a friend, ' i deserve to be happy' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jetta Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 Perfect does NOT exist. However there is perfect for you. Someone whose nuances are tollerable really. You're best if you seek out your ideal mate, and don't look for perfect. Besides perfect would be flat, boring, etc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iwantittoend Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 Yeah, there is no perfect person for you. Everyone has flaws. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dako Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 People aren't a static entity. A partner is a dynamically changing organism. In the course of a relationship, they may be constantly evolving. Expecting perfection is a tall order, and that person will change. I'd go for someone with core beliefs that I admire, and enjoy the growth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hosswhispra Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 Do we look for the prefect mate or do we make a commitment and make do? What should we do? Is there a perfect partner? or do we make them into the prefect partner? Should we commit to the one and stop the search for the prefect partner and accept that the one we have chosen may not be the prefect one. Why is it the people continue to search for the perfect partner even when they are attached? I was told by a friend, ' i deserve to be happy' First off, I don't think there is a 'perfect mate'. Second, I think that we should just do whatever makes us happy while doing our best not to hurt others. With those two things said, In general, I think the majority of people out there settle and are with people they don't feel a spark for. This is a relatively new realization that I arrived at. I have met people who are married for 15-20+ years that told me they got married because their peers were and they felt an internal pressure or something. I asked them if they ever felt the spark and they said, "no". That blew me away when I heard that. But, yes it is now my understanding that most people settle. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
renaissancewoman101 Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 Right now I am at this point, I would settle even if he wasnt the "perfect" mate. Not that I want kids or anything, but it would be nice to have the presense of a SO in my chaotic life. As you get older, I think you start to compromise on more and more things. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hosswhispra Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 Right now I am at this point, I would settle even if he wasnt the "perfect" mate. Not that I want kids or anything, but it would be nice to have the presense of a SO in my chaotic life. As you get older, I think you start to compromise on more and more things. I know it gets lonely sometimes but don't settle. I spent some time with a group of truly wonderful individuals in the Sonoran Desert last November and they were extremely unhappy that they settled. They made the journey into the desert to figure out what they wanted out of life and they were older than me and you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HyruleGuardian Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 There is no perfect partner. You should end up with someone that likes you for who you are and someone you like back the same way. Unfortunately, I have a feeling it doesn't work out this way most of the time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
applepie Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 If you can't be with the one you want, love the one you're with. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
valiantv Posted February 16, 2007 Share Posted February 16, 2007 I don't think there's such person as a perfect mate... or "The One" as they are sometimes referred to. There is the person you are happy with. If you are happy that you are with someone, and they are faithful and happy they are with you, then great! I think that if God (or whoever) intended one perfect match for every person, He would have made them easier to find. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dako Posted February 16, 2007 Share Posted February 16, 2007 What if that one perfect soulmate lives in Seoul, and speaks no English? You'll never meet them. We fall for the best choice we meet, not out of the world's population, but a smaller group we encounter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Momene Posted February 16, 2007 Share Posted February 16, 2007 You can marry someone you feel the spark with but people change over time. Sometimes if you stay with someone your growth gets stunted as you're not able to take them with you on your preferred journey. It's a bit like when you go out for the day and you end up going somewhere you both "quite like" rather than either first choice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iwishiknew Posted February 17, 2007 Share Posted February 17, 2007 I have been searching and waiting for a girl for a long time and nothing. Not everyone gets a mate Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remade Posted February 17, 2007 Share Posted February 17, 2007 Trash_mail, It's not perfect. Everyone knows there's no such thing as perfect. But when that guy or girl hits the milestone or meets that standard of yours. Then a bell rings in your head and tells you, he/she's good enough. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treefrogkate Posted February 17, 2007 Share Posted February 17, 2007 Do we look for the prefect mate or do we make a commitment and make do? What should we do? Is there a perfect partner? The short answer is no. The longer answer is that it is possible to find someone who makes you happy, fulfills your needs, and respects who you are. There is no such thing as perfect, but there are people out there that can make you happy nonetheless. or do we make them into the prefect partner? Nope. You'll never change someone into your view of perfect. If you think you need to change someone, then they are not the right person for you. Should we commit to the one and stop the search for the prefect partner and accept that the one we have chosen may not be the prefect one. If you are both happy, and love and respect one another, then why keep looking? If you can communicate openly and honestly, can have a laugh together, and can get through the hard times by talking through it instead of blowing up at each other, then why keep looking? If you can honestly say that you wouldn't change someone and love and accept them for who they are, and your significant other says the same, then why keep looking? I really don't think it's settling if you're happy. Sure, there might be someone out there that is better, but what are the chances that you'll find them? Or will you be miserable for the rest of your life because you let this one go? Why is it the people continue to search for the perfect partner even when they are attached? I was told by a friend, ' i deserve to be happy' I don't have an answer for this. I know that I have found in my boyfriend the person I want to be with for the rest of my life, so I am done looking. I don't need to keep looking because I am happy. I have never understood those who are with a partner but keep their eyes open just in case "something better" comes along. If you're truly happy with your partner, there's no need to keep looking. If you're still looking, then I guess your current partner isn't fulfilling your needs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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