Again!

[Gracelove]

This woman is on a roll!

Okay, my mom had a little breakdown crying session about 30min. ago.

She was talking about how she feels she works so hard and all of her effort is wasted.

She was saying that she's just so tired and that there are things that she's wanted and has worked hard for and it seems that none of it is working.

I can relate and was trying to console her.

Of course she mentioned my dad, my brother, and I.

How it hasn't been easy being with my dad, and the she wanted successful children and her children were paralyzed by fear.

Okay, I can swallow the fact that she feels she has invested in her children and they aren't successful/failures......afterall, that is her point of view (although I don't consider graduating from college and having a job to be a failure, but whatever).

Then she says she feels I'm choosing the same path and my dad.

My dad had his father blown away with a shot-gun (shot 8 times) in front of his whole family on his sister's birthday. My father was then called to testify but was blamed for his father's death (because he didn't address a white man as sir....of course the incident occurred down south, in segregated times).

Now of course everyone knows that if you don't address a man as "sir", and that crazy nut decides to come to your house and blow away your parent; it's not your fault. Of course there is a lot of trauma that comes with that, and my father spent a long time working through that (and he didn't have therapy, so it took much longer).

Anywho, and then there's me, I was raped.

So, here's where I think my mother is lacking in the sensitivity department, because neither of us chose to be tramatized (although she believes we choosing to let it affect us).

Anywho, although I disagree, I can refrain from voicing that because afterall she's greiving.

So my dad and I are trying to comfort her while she's talking about selling the house.

Okay, fast forward about 25min.

My mom just starts talking about how she's not going to want to live with me when she's old because she won't want to live with me and my unruly children.

 

Okay, now I'm not happy. Children aren't even here yet.

Why would you say that I'm going to have unruly children???

I was a far cry from an unruly child. I was often referred to as being a "goodie-two-shoes" (I wonder who in the world came up with that expression).

 

And this isn't the first time she has said this.

 

So I say, well I'm not going to have unruly children. And she says, it only takes one child to make a house miserable.

 

I think that's a cheap shot. Because I'm my mom's and dad's only biological child and I'm the only one living with them in the house.

 

I just had to leave.

It's like when she's in a bad mood she attacks.

 

And this is the woman who always says, " don't blame others".

She's not the only one that's tired.

[CarnelianButterfly]

Comments like that are uncalled for, I don't how upset a person is they don't need to take a dump on all the other people around them.

 

Maybe you should give her back some tough love.

 

I'd tell her maybe my children won't want a grandmother that thought they were crap even before they were born.

 

Ask her where she plans to live then as she has already decided your future home is horrible for her.