broke no contact yesterday after a few weeks

[swertyqwerty]

I was not feeling well yesterday while I was at school . I decided to leave early and it just so happened that my ex was leaving at the same time. I take the bus to school every day which is about a 30 minute ride + 20 minute walk. It was an extremely hot day and could not stand it. I tried asking other people for a ride but they all seemed busy.

 

Regretfully, I asked my ex to take me home. She told me that she couldn't because she wasn't going home (we live relatively close to each other, but she was going to her new BF's house).

 

We ended up talking on the phone for 20 minutes, getting on each others nerves and saying things that would hurt each other.

 

30 minutes later, she called me and apologized for being rude and she was sorry. I told her it was fine and I didn't really expect anything out of that conversation so I wasn't let down. she seemed a little sad and hung up.

 

then I unblocked her on AIM and she messaged me. At first, she was doing her " * * * * *y towards the ex" attitude and tried her best to ridicule me, especially when I was talking to her about how the girl i asked out had a boyfriend. She even said

 

ou: even when i asked carolina to the movies

ou: she thought it was only a friend thing

21: right

21: i wonder why

21: what do u think

21: i mean why do you think that is?

21: i mean they must not be attracted at all to u

21: but why

 

It eventually faded, like it always does, to the point where she feels bad that she did that and acts a little nicer. We talk as if we never separated. I sign off first online and she signs off 9 minutes later (I was only invisible).

 

She calls me at midnight, sounding as if she was hurt or feeling bad. She called and said she just wanted to say g'night and hope you're feeling well (since I was still feeling sick). I said thank you and I really appreciate that coming from you. I tried my best not to show that I still think about her and care about her. That didn't work out too well because we ended up talking on the phone for an hour and thirty minutes. During that time, we nearly had phone sex (something we've done before while she was with her current bf), talked as if we were still together (or both of us not being * * * * *es to each other), I sang her to sleep, and hung up.

 

If she ever does separate from her boyfriend, and i'm single, I would want to try our relationship over again. I know I shouldn't even be talking to her now. I know I have to take care of MY healing process before I consider talking to her. I also know that if I want her back, I shouldn't be acting the way I would be acting if we were together. If I acted like we were in a relationship while we were still friends, she would have no reason to be in a relationship with me.

 

She hasn't been online yet and she hasn't called. I was going to start NC today, but I guess it doesn't matter since she started it. I guess I gave her too much that she doesn't have to use me for a long while.

 

What are your opinions on why she's acting this way? Why does she stay on the phone for so long and allow me to do this to her when i broke up with her and when she has a new boyfriend?

 

Oh, she just signed on. I wonder if she is going to message me.

[EvaGina]

you are terrible for each other... playing and manipulating each other, badly.

[swertyqwerty]

I left her for someone else

 

then a few months later i regret it

 

i come back to her but she is in another relationship