finewhine Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 What's the lamest pickup line you've ever used/gotten? I was inspired to ask this because last night, while I was out dancing, a guy approached me at the bar. He said, "Oh, I enjoyed talking with you downstairs." To which I replied, "You must have confused me with somebody else." His response: "Well, you have a twin, and your twin is HOT." I think I said, "Good to know" and walked away. Priceless! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
puff.tm.dragon Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 You're so hot! I just wanna rub smart balance all over you because it's 1/2 the cholesterol of real butter. ...yeah, she said no. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charley Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 I'll tell you in due course, but first you gotta play along. Wanna play pool? (if we're near a pool table) Wanna play checkers? (if we're near a checkers board) Wanna ________? Substitute the competetive activity of your choice. If you say "yes", then I say, "OK, but winner gets to be on top." =============== Now I've never said that to a woman, but I have a friend who did and she later married him. I'm saving it for a special occasion. Though I'm not sure it's really all that bad. Is it bad or good? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charley Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 I wanna oil you up like a new baseball glove! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vandgsmom Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 Oh, Uggg... I was hoping not to have to think of this again... lol There was a certain man that I worked with years ago who had been watching me all day really creepy, and as I bent over the front desk to change the outgoing message at the end of the day, he walked up behind me and rubbed his erection over my backside and said: "Can you tell I am interested?" Double ewww. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dako Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 A co-worker sat in my lap and stuck her tongue down my throat. She asked me to schtup her in the company photo darkroom. I told her it wasn't dark enough. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
finewhine Posted January 15, 2007 Author Share Posted January 15, 2007 Vandgsmom- AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! I challenge anyone to beat that for the simple yuck factor. Dako - nice comeback! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vandgsmom Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 I told her it wasn't dark enough. Lol. I dunno. The dark, combined with that flattering red lightbulb and the heady smell of developed... Might have been a good ride. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dako Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 She was a popular girl. Way too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zerohalo Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 Oh, Uggg... I was hoping not to have to think of this again... lol There was a certain man that I worked with years ago who had been watching me all day really creepy, and as I bent over the front desk to change the outgoing message at the end of the day, he walked up behind me and rubbed his erection over my backside and said: "Can you tell I am interested?" Double ewww. Sweet monkey-lord. What the hell is that about? I hope you gave him a shot to the groin for it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vandgsmom Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 I realized later that I should have just turned around and squeezed his balls until they burst and said " Can you tell I am not?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charley Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 I told her it wasn't dark enough. That's not a pick-up line. It's a drop-off line. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charley Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 I realized later that I should have just turned around and squeezed his balls until they burst and said " Can you tell I am not?" I don't know what to say. Once again you've rendered me speechless, or nearly. You're the only one who does that and this is the second time. Take a bow. Who was this guy? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vandgsmom Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 My EX parnter in a healthcare practice circa 2001.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charley Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 My EX parnter in a healthcare practice circa 2001.... Sorry that happened to you. He sounds gross. I think it'd be funnier to squeeze and twist until his nuts pop and his d!ck wilts and then make fun of him for not being able to keep it up. You would have been very young at the time to. I suppose this jerk was older to, huh? I'm conflicted between sorrow for you and anger for him. What he did was a form of sexual assault. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eddward Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 I've never had the chance to use it, but I've always wanted to try: "Hey baby, I have a level 100 Charizard." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zerohalo Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 I've never had the chance to use it, but I've always wanted to try: "Hey baby, I have a level 100 Charizard." Best. Line. Ever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DropToZero Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 Ummm...I work at a popular teen clothing store...in which we have many many many sexually innuendo'd t-shirts and stuff...I'm not going to name them all lol, but I think my favorite one is... "If I told you that you had a nice body, would you hold it against me?" But...that's a pretty safe one compared to most of the others hehe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vandgsmom Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 I've never had the chance to use it, but I've always wanted to try: "Hey baby, I have a level 100 Charizard." OMG, am I the only grown woman who would have gotten that one? Substitute Electric Pikachu and you would have had me once upon a time.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dako Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 V, you're a gem. Your old biz partner lost out on a good friend. Punishment enough. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charley Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 Ummm...I work at a popular teen clothing store...in which we have many many many sexually innuendo'd t-shirts and stuff...I'm not going to name them all lol, but I think my favorite one is... "If I told you that you had a nice body, would you hold it against me?" But...that's a pretty safe one compared to most of the others hehe That's line is older than my grandpa's buckskin condem. Well, not really, but I couldn't resist saying that old line about another old line. I think that "hold it against me" line is from the 70s. Am I right? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vandgsmom Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 V, you're a gem. Your old biz partner lost out on a good friend. Punishment enough. Now THAT is a good pick up line... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charley Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 My fav women's T-shirt was the one worn by Eliza Dushku (oh baby) in the movie Bring it. It said, "Rub here!" on the chest part of shirt. My other fav women's T-Shirt says on chest, "Stop looking at my chest." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
caro33 Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 That's line is older than my grandpa's buckskin condem. Well, not really, but I couldn't resist saying that. I think that "hold it against me" line is from the 70s. Am I right Dako? Late 70s. "If I Said You Had a Beautiful Body (Would You Hold It Against Me)" by the Bellamy Brothers. Quality listening Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eddward Posted January 15, 2007 Share Posted January 15, 2007 Yeah, if a girl goes for the Charizard line, you KNOW you've got a keeper. Here's another one for networking/computer security people. "Hey there, do you need a penetration test?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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