Her friend has feeling for me?!

[Sean]

(Real name not used.)

 

Ok, so I am dating this wonderful girl Amelia, and I do mean wonderful. She is EVERYTHING I look for in a girl and more! I am happy with her and although our relationship has gotten off to a rough start, I woudln't trade it in for anything else in the world. Now this friend of her, Jane, is also a friend of mine, hell that's how we met. Now at the beginning Jane protested to the fact that me and Amelia were intrested in one another. Well, fast-forward through all that mess, me and Amelia been dating each other for a month now, and everything is going great. I though that by now all the trouble was over and Jane was more accepting of this relationship. Well today Amelia tells me that Mary (another one of her friend) has told her that Jane has feelings for me. I have no feelings beyond friendship for Jane, and she really is a great friend, but that's all she is to me. I told Amelia this and reassured her that I wanted to be with her and not Jane. So now Amelia is confused because she doesn't know what to do. She wants to maintain her friendship with Jane, but she also wants to be with me. (This has been a problem from day 1). I told Amelia that from day one that I would not come between her and Jane, and that if she was forced to choose, to go with Jane. Now I would talk to Jane about this, however Amelia has made me promise her that I wouldn't, so I dunno. God this is just more complicated than it needs to be. Right now Amelia is trying to figure out what to do, and I told her that whatever she decides to do I'll support her decision (Yea that worked out real well for me the last 500 freakin' time I said that! So now Amelia is trying to decide what to do, I am alittle upset because I really like Amelia and I personally think Jane needs to stop this because it's just not fair to Amelia or me. So what do you guys think?

[CarnelianButterfly]

I think Jane needs to grow up and let other people be happy.

 

Tell her that you are dating Amelia, you like her only as a friend and that its not fair to her to make Amelia decide who to keep. Jane needs to get over herself.

[barbielovesmac]

I think Jane needs to grow up and let other people be happy.

 

Tell her that you are dating Amelia, you like her only as a friend and that its not fair to her to make Amelia decide who to keep. Jane needs to get over herself.

 

I agree. You cannot help who you have feelings for. Jane has no right to make Amelia chose. IF she was really her friend then she wouldn't make her chose. She would accept the fact that Amelia was happy.

[Sean]

I would love nothing more than to just sit down with the both of them and tell Jane that I am dating Amelia, I only like her as a friend, and she needs to stop this. However, I am not very umm, tactful when it comes to speaking. I tend to be blunt, brutually honest and I don't beat around the bush. So my usual method may not be the right one.

 

Is there anyway of working this out and still have Amelia have her cake and eat it too? Despite all that's happen Amelia and Jane are very close friends, and I would like to try to end this with them at least remaining friends.

[barbielovesmac]

If you don't speak up then the situation will just get dragged out. You can be blunt without being a jerk. You just need to let her know how you feel.