I want to stop my meds

[renaissancewoman101]

I can't stand taking anxiety meds anymore. I feel so BLAH and I sleep so much. Like today. I didnt have class today because it was All Saints Day (Catholic holiday) so I stayed home and slept most of the freaking morning. I now have to run off to clinicals soon and face Tom (hopefully he'll talk to me). These meds, while helping me control my anxiety, make me freaking tired ALL THE TIME. I nap every day like for 2-3 hours (either after class and clinicals or in the morning when I dont have school). Everything is so bland. My emotions are so bland. It's as though I am living in a black and white world without vibrancy or colors. I know intense ups and downs are not goood, but that is life and I miss life as it TRULY IS.

 

Without the meds, yeah I was up or down, going emotionally crazy about things, but I dealt with things. Now, I sleep a lot and feel as though the color has gone out of life. Things dont affect me as much and I dont feel like dealing with things as much. Like with Tom. Without the meds, I would be plotting and thinking of why he treated me the way he did on Sunday. I would analyze things, come up with a game plan, etc. Now, I just feel BLAH!!!!! LIKE I DONT CARE. I do care but the UMPH is gone.

 

I think I am just gonna quit these meds and get my old self back.

 

I dont know. I cant stand sleeping all the time and it is making me gain weight.

[VIRGOLDY]

Ren what are U taking? I used to take Paxil and it made me feel the same way.I felt like a shell with no core...I was just existing and going through the motions. It helped me througha tough period though so I didn;t cry so much,and get crazy. Now I'm off it.

[doyathink]

Is there a change you and your doc could look into a different kind? If you do stop, your doc will probably want you to do it gradual and not all of the sudden as that will cause some problems too.

[CarnelianButterfly]

Maybe you need to see about going on a lower dose. I have similar problems at times with my drugs. My doc and I talked about it, I'm currently on the highest possible dose, but will cut back if its too much at times. Talk to your doc about the dosage maybe being too high or the side effects of the drug being too much. You may even need to change drugs entirely, I've done that a few times, this is the 4th drug I've tried and it is the best so far.

[renaissancewoman101]

I am taking Celexa, 30 mg once a day.

 

This is the first time I ever took anxiety meds. Is it really supposed to be like this, make you sleep more, make life so bland and one so sluggish? I told my doc this and he upped the meds a bit (I used to be taking 20mg) saying that it would stop my constant tiredness. It hasnt.

[kellbell]

Hey there RW,

 

I took Xanax several years ago for my panic attacks and agoraphobia. They worked great in the beginning. I was able to sit through a whole class, go to the mall, etc without feeling panicy.

 

Then I realized that these meds are only acting a bandaid. A crutch if you will. I STILL felt that anxiety underneath it all. It is my belief that benzos/sedatives/tranquils hinder a person's coping abilities and masks the true reason behind the anxiety.

 

I too, felt "dopey" and very disassociated from matters while taking Xanax. I truly hated taking them. So, I stopped. I got down to the heart of the matter and figured out what the real issue was. I would use a lot of self talk, deep breathing and focusing. Also, I had tremendous support from friends and family. I still sometime get anxious in large crowds. My boyfriend senses when I do and he holds my hand. He is not too particularly fond of crowds either for other reasons.

 

What I would suggest is to take a look inside yourself. Get to the root of the anxiety. Anxiety IMO is a very useless emotion and reeks havoc and tricks our brains into believing things that are simply not true. Have you read any books on anxiety or perhaps find a forum with member whom are going through the same thing as you?

 

I know how dehibilitating anxiety can be but I know it CAN be conquered. Hang in there.

[VIRGOLDY]

I used to cut mine in half instead of the whole thing..lol...try it.

[ImThatGirl]

Ren???

 

I'm concerned about you. Through your posts, I see lots of emotion. Sometimes up's, sometimes down's but never black and white.

 

Your sleeping - When did this start? The naps during the day?

 

As I said above, according to your posts, you don't feel just blah. You seem to feel, care, worry, get happy.

 

Do you think it's possible that you are just depressed? Depressed because you feel semi rejected by Tom?

 

If you decide you want to go off your meds, consult with your doctor. One of the biggest problems with antidepressants and anxiety medication patients is that they convince themselfs they are better when on the medication. They go off the medication and a serious emotional spiral begins.

 

Please be careful.

[renaissancewoman101]

Kellbell, I haven't really done anything to deal with my anxiety except for go to therapy. I am trying to work through some issues and my therapist tells me that the meds will help control my anxiety while I work through this issues. True, the meds control the anxiety but they take away the zest of life, which is not the best thing. This is the first time I ever took meds and the bland, dead feeling I have is not something I really like.

 

Life is vibrant and full of ups and downs and I miss that. I also feel that I have a harder time going out and doing things. I dont know.

 

Like right now, I have to go to my clinicals. I dont feel like going and confronting Tom. I just feel blah. Without the meds, I would be worrying about things, but it would help me come up with ideas to deal with Tom and "confront" him. Now I just feel like not doing ANYTHING.

[kellbell]

Yes, there are pros and cons with taking these meds. Pro: anxiety SYMPTOMS go away, notice SYMPTOMS not the ACTUAL anxiety and where it is coming from. Con: feeling dopey, don't care, sluggish, no pep.

 

The same thing happened to my mom. She was taking Lexapro (with therapy) and I truly believe it was making her worse because she was not ADDRESSING the depression itself, but all the other distractions going around. I have always felt that anti-depressives were supposed to lift the fog if you will so the patient CAN deal with life in more pro-social and benifical ways. Nope, my mom seemed to go down a spiral. So, not only do I feel the patients need to contend with the symptoms but also need to play detective along with his/her therapist and figure out where it is coming from. I personally do not feel my mom's therapist was doing that at all.

 

If you do not mind me asking, what kind of therapy are you undergoing? If you do not want to share it publicly, feel free to PM me.

[ImThatGirl]

Ren, Is it possible that maybe you're just not used to dealing with things in a rational manner?

 

Please don't take offense to this question. I have experience with lots of anxiety and lots of rollercoasters. The ups and downs can be addicting. I have since learned how to handle most of my anxiety. Maybe a confrontation isn't needed with Tom?

[arwen]

Maybe you can discuss switching meds. Not all work the same way for all persons, we all react differently to them. I don't know Celexa, but when I was on Remeron, I used to be exactly like you. Drowsy, sleepy and feeling like nothing could really bother me. But it helped me through the deepest point, although not beyond that point so to say.

 

I am now on Efexor, which I respond much better to. The thing is that it works also on noradrenalin and dopamin levels. That IS a side effect, i am tired a lot but don't sleep too well... but it's far far better than the alternative.

 

Don't quit by yourself, and for SURE don't do that cold turkey. I wanted to take a lower dose, and had to switch between the current and the lower dose for two weeks. Now I am just on a maintanance dose, because winter is coming and I know I risk a relapse in that season. So in case things go south, I don't need to start building the meds up, I can just switch back to the other dose.

 

Unfortunately, AD's generally tend to take away ALL the edges, both high and low. I must say that Effexor does not have that effect THAT much. Maybe discuss and see. Learning what is the best AD is a process of trial and error for all people who need them

 

Ilse

[Juliana]

Ren, we haven't talked much, and I know this is very sensitive stuff. I do, however, have a history of dealing with emotional problems. I'm dealing with that right now as well, and what I'd like to point out is that you are assuming that coming up with a "game plan" would be a good approach, when in fact, it might be a huge mistake, freaking out Tom, and basically being self-destructive.

 

You say you miss life as it "truly is," but one thing people do not see when they are dealing with emotional problems is life as it "truly is." Instead you see it through the distorting prism of the emotional problems, pulled out of shape by inner forces that you can't discern or control properly. You may have enjoyed the tremendous emotional peaks and valleys, but the perceptions you had of life and the behaviours born out of that certainly was not life as it "truly is."

 

You need to give your therapy a chance to work, without risking going off the beam and losing all the progress you've made towards establishing a secure future for yourself. I would definitely put in a call to the doctor and tell him that your exhaustion is surprising and concerning you. Don't do anything too hasty, thinking that the medication is the problem. The emotional issues are the problem.

[NJRon]

How long have you been taking your current dosage?

[kellbell]

Hey Again RW,

 

Like other posters have pointed out...please do not stop taking these meds cold turkey. It can be very dangerous. Xanax was a little different, I took them as on a needed basis. You must be weened off those kinds of meds.

 

Either try cutting them in half or asking your doctor to lower the dosage.

[Dako]

Ren,

 

Whatever you decide, please get a doc's opinion.

Many people feel they can just stop and deal with it, but have forgotten what drove them to seek help in the first place. Trying a different drug might be a good idea, since quitting can put back to square one with your anxieties before longterm cognitive therapy has a chance.

 

I quit cold turkey but in the midst of it I did run it by my therapist in case I was courting disaster. It's no picnic. Last week I had a real bad day.

[Hope75]

Ren,

 

When did you start taking the Celexa?

 

Some of those side effects will lessen with time, and the other thing is that maybe your doc brought up your dose too fast without starting low enough or tapering slow enough to manage the side effect of being drowsy.

 

Sounds like it is working TOO good!

 

Try putting a call in to your doc and perhaps you can get the dose adjusted, or he will tell you to hang it out for a few more weeks and see if it subsides.

[ultraviolet]

You've been given lots of great advice. I just wanted to add that when I was on meds and they were making me tired, I talked to my doctor who suggested I switch the time of day I take them. I was taking them in the morning and was exhausted for the rest of the day, so I started taking them in the evening with dinner. Voila! Problem solved.

 

I'm no longer on the meds because I like you hate the side effects, but I'm not necessarily anti-meds. Antidepressants helped lessen the dramatic highs and lows of my emotions while I was in therapy until I was ready to handle them alone. The interesting thing to me is that after being on the meds for two years, it's like my brain has been trained to stay "calm" in the face of stress. I'm still me, a person who tends to be ruled by her emotions, but now I'm a calmer me who takes a step back to reevaluate a situation before I jump to conclusions.

 

I believe antidepressants have their place in therapy, but like anything else they shouldn't be a long term emotional crutch. I was told I'd probably have to take those pills for the rest of my life because my depression was due to the "fact" that my brain wasn't manufacturing enough serotonin. Although it's true that serotonin averages tends to be lower in individuals who are depressed versus the average population, this pronouncement was made to me based on my being depressed (something I stated), not due to any blood work or test that was ever performed on me (Why? Because there is no test!) and dosage adjustments were always based on feedback I gave the doctor as to how I was feeling. So if you feel the meds have outlived their usefulness or are harming more than helping you, you have every right to stop taking them, but please don't do so without consulting your doctor. Withdrawal symptoms can be unbearable and sometimes life threatening.

 

It's best to taper off these brain altering drugs gradually (smaller and smaller dosages) and over a period of several weeks. IMHO, the very idea that we have to take these pills for the rest of our lives due to some inborn serotonin deficit is BS the pharmaceutical companies feed the doctors to feed us so that we'll keep boosting their bottom line. What these people don't tell you is that there are plenty of other natural things you can do to boost your serotonin (like diet, sleep, and exercise) that are just as effective, but healthier, safer, and cheaper. More below...

 

The Anti-Depressant Fact Book: What Your Doctor Won't Tell You About Prozac, Zoloft, Paxil, Celexa, and Luvox by Peter R. Breggin, M.D.

[shes2smart]

As I recall, you've been on these meds for a very short time (2-3 months?)

 

When I went on Lexapro (which is chemically related to Celexa), my doc would only put me on it if I agreed to a MINIMUM of 6 months on it.

 

Yeah, I had that lopping off to emotional extremes you mentioned. I likened it to floating in a tub of water that was the same temp as your body...warm & comfy...but after a while you started to lose track of where the water ended and where you began....I also likened it to eating bland macaroni & cheese day in and day out.

 

And I HATED it...but I also knew that to get the maximum benefit out of meds & therapy I had to stick with it for a minimum of 6 months, so I toughed it out and worked very aggressively at confronting things I needed to confront in therapy so I could get off the meds as soon as possible.

 

Turned out I was on 'em for 8 months....and haven't needed 'em since.

 

You might need a little downward adjustment to combat the drowsiness if it's problematic. But is it possible that your body needs more rest than what you are willing to give it? Sometimes that can happen when we've got a lot going on -- we push ourselves to get by with 5 or 6 hours sleep when our body really wants/needs more to operate at peak efficiency.

 

You've come this far. Sticking with it for a full 6 months and re-evaluating meds/therapy isn't going to hurt....after all, how long were you struggling to get by with rollercoaster emotions and no meds? Isn't the possibility of having a manageable long-term outcome worth a few months of emotional blandness?

 

I found it to be a pretty fair trade-off, m'self.

[annie24]

the other thing, ren, is that there have been studies that show that if you get off anxiety meds before 6-9 months, you have an increased risk of falling into a major depression. that is why if you are prescribed, you need to stay on them for at least 6 months (which is what S2S's doc told her).

 

I agree with the others, keep with the meds, talk to your doctor, maybe they can change your dosage or give you a different drug. keep going to therapy, and please exercise. it releases endorphins and you need some more good feelings right now.

 

again, I cannot urge you enough to go talk to your doctor about this. this just may not be the right drug for you, many people often have to try 2-3 drugs before they find one that works for them.

[renaissancewoman101]

Thanks for your responses.

 

I plan on staying on the meds. I am just tired of the side-effects of constantly being tired all the time and sleeping a lot. I have never been a person who likes to sleep a lot. I tend to always be on the go. Since I've been on the meds, I conk out earlier, nap during the day, and feel sluggish. I also have never lived life where the ups and downs were gone. I have always had tremendous highs and lows with my emotions and my feelings and reactions. That was one part of my personality that defined me and now I feel that part of my personality is gone. People have always described me as nice, upbeat, kind, emotional, compassionate, energetic, but now I feel the emotional and energetic part of me is muted, silenced.

 

I started sleeping during the day about a month ago. I would come home from school and nap a few hours, or on the days I didnt have school, I would nap during the early afternoon. I just feel tired and sluggish and have to force myself to stay up late, unlike when I used to be able to stay up late all the time.

 

Kellbell, I feel like what your mom is feeling where the meds seem to be putting me in a depressive spiral of inactivity and sluggishness, something I never felt before. I have therapy once every two weeks where she tries to give me ideas on how to overcome certain issues in my life, like finding a job, dealing with my relationship with my mother, etc.

 

I had thought that with the meds, I would be more motivated to do things, go out there, etc. I have made some strides, like meeting Tom, going to school, etc., but I have NOT been motivated enough to go find a job and I thought the meds were supposed to help me with my motivation.

 

I'mThatGirl, this is the first time I ever took anxiety meds so I am not sure if this is how it is supposed to be (life minus the oomph). I have always lived my life in a constant state of flux (ups and downs). My mom is like that too, moody, emotional, very up and down.

 

I am going to call the doctor tomorrow and see if I can get the dosage adjusted, although I have only been on this dosage (30mg) for about two weeks. I'll see. I may try taking it at night instead of in the morning.

[annie24]

oh yeah, the first thing you should try is taking the meds at night. i found that helped me a little bit.

 

and yes, I took naps in the daytime also. it sucks, but well... those are just the side effects. make sure to set aside enough time at night to sleep.

 

yeah, that is what the meds do. they help tune down the highs and lows you are having, so you can *hopefully* start making some positive changes in your life.

 

i think you will adjust some more after you've been taking the meds for several more weeks.

 

anyways, in the meantime, hang in there. find a job, try to have some fun. I think a job would be good because it would take your mind off a lot of things you worry about.

[ImThatGirl]

Thanks for your responses.

 

I plan on staying on the meds. I am just tired of the side-effects of constantly being tired all the time and sleeping a lot. I have never been a person who likes to sleep a lot. I tend to always be on the go. Since I've been on the meds, I conk out earlier, nap during the day, and feel sluggish. I also have never lived life where the ups and downs were gone. I have always had tremendous highs and lows with my emotions and my feelings and reactions. That was one part of my personality that defined me and now I feel that part of my personality is gone. People have always described me as nice, upbeat, kind, emotional, compassionate, energetic, but now I feel the emotional and energetic part of me is muted, silenced..

 

Wasn't the emotional and energetic issues part of what seemed like a rollercoaster ride? I know when I used to be emotional and energetic, I was a mess. Up and down, up and down!

 

I started sleeping during the day about a month ago. I would come home from school and nap a few hours, or on the days I didnt have school, I would nap during the early afternoon. I just feel tired and sluggish and have to force myself to stay up late, unlike when I used to be able to stay up late all the time...

 

Getting at least 8 hours of sleep is important. I used to stay up until 3 am sometimes a little later and then jump back up around 6:00 am to get ready again. I couldn't figure out why I was so tired and couldn't focus. You need your sleep! I know it's weird feeling like you now have a bedtime (due to lack of energy) but I think that's what your body needs - it's just such an extreme change to make in life.

 

The napping. Tell me, if you had someone to spend the afternoons with, would you be too tired or would you be bouncing with joy? I think you may just be bored, lonely, and down.... So you sleep!

 

I'mThatGirl, this is the first time I ever took anxiety meds so I am not sure if this is how it is supposed to be (life minus the oomph). I have always lived my life in a constant state of flux (ups and downs). My mom is like that too, moody, emotional, very up and down....

 

 

I know what it's like to live life in a constant state of flux (ups and downs.) I used to soooo much. Every aspect of my life ups and downs. I thought to myself and even stated to family "I know I can do all this. I just want routine and normalcy and a calm, happy, life." I longed to find the way to living that way.

 

My physician prescribed valium to me. I kept it on hand for "life altering" events like moving out of town or sometimes even just a presentation. Things that I knew I'd have to handle but needed a little calming to do it. Then I started sorting out the negative. We have a fairly quiet, normal life now without lots of ups and downs.

 

I think your therapy will help you drastically. For me it was a matter of retraining my mind to "not" need all the ups and downs. Do call your doctor. I've heard that sometimes it takes awhile to find the right meds for each person. No one med works for every person...

 

Keep your chin up!!! What are you doing this weekend???

[renaissancewoman101]

I'mThatGirl, you are right. This is an adjustment period for me to get used to life without all the drama. As for sleep, I always was able to survive on 4-5 hours of sleep a night and still be going great. I feel more rested nowadays, but also more lazy and depressed.

 

This weekend, I have no idea what I am going to do. Maybe go up and see my folks for a bit. Go out and shop, wander around. Not sure yet. There's lots to do out here. Just have to get motivated enough to go out and DO it.

[ImThatGirl]

IT's extreme adjustments, isn't it? It felt extremely odd to me too. But I love it! Love it, love it!

 

You don't have a choice! I demand you go out and have some fun!!!!! You're in CA!! Go have some fun for me, please?