Need advice on getting back together with an ex

[blueberrypie]

My ex broke up with me 4 and a half months ago because he had to go abroad for almost half a year. We kept very LC for the first 3 1/2 months, but we began to have fairly constant contact past few weeks.

I thought I was over him when we began to contact more often, but as the contact(which is only email-format since we are a continent apart) got more frequent, I began to feel different. I want to get back together when he comes back to the States which is the mid-December. We talk about everyday life, sometimes about things which happened while we were dating, but never talk about the relationship itself. It's good to communicate with him even through emails, but it makes me anxious about us getting back together.

 

My question is, should I let him know how I feel and ask him if he's interested in getting back together eventually and cut the contact if he's not. Or should I just 'fake' the friendship till he comes back and talk to him in person?

 

Any input is welcome!

[laboheme]

First of all, I don't think faking the friendship is a good idea. I would normally advocate dealing with serious relationship issues in person, but in your case I think it may be advantageous to casually bring it up in an email. That way, he won't be pressured to reply immediately, and in case he rejects the idea, you won't find yourself in one of those dreaded teary-eyed face-to-face conversations. Also, it will be much easier to cut contact and start moving on, and you won't have to feel the anxiety that you're feeling now. And in the event that he is considering the idea (and if it's just the pressure of long distance that caused the breakup, he might be open to reconciling), you can slowly start building up your relationship over email -- it's a great exercise in communication!!!

 

Regardless of what you decide to do, good luck!