Is it worth it?

[Alabama]

I'm having a tough time right trying to push myself forward. I want to be a good RA/student. But I'm finding it increassingly difficult whenever I think about love. I don't want that right now. My goal in life is to improve myself these next two years. I've already got materials on studying abroad in Japan next year. Yet no matter I get so damn depressed anytime it's mentioned. How can I push myself when the pain of it all comes rushing back? Is it even worth it when it comes? I don't know right now, I'm just so damn frusterated. It sucks.

[robowarrior]

Well the problem is that you need to 'vent' so you can move on and do your thing. I think 60% of the guys don't reach their goals in life just because of the thought of love occupies 99% of their daily thinking.

 

In terms of studying you really need to lock yourself away, zero interferance! So you can work insanely on what you want to achieve in life. Think your way to achieving your goal, and not your way to woman.

[NJRon]

Please vent ... that's great! I am confused as to whether you are torn between a current love, or a lack of love. Please share.

[Alabama]

Lack of love. But I don't want to vent. I'm someone who is very introverted and have never wanted for people to see me in pain or suffering. I can't have that. Somehow, I need to keep this inside...but it's getting harder. All I want to do is become fluent in Japanese, become a writer, and succeed at being an RA...but this damn want of love won't stop!! It's ruining my life...I need to find a way to make it stop. But venting won't work.

[g44]

if u can tackle the problem of needing to keep things inside - then u will be much happier...this is just about u worrying about how others may see u and your self worth...just turn that thought around and think about how free you will feel once u let go of that. and u will be amazed at how much weight is off your shoulders....isn't this about being honest to yourself? u know that will help but u don't because of just a few issues - ones i believe u could solve without much worry because you are probably smart and more capable than to u think u are....

just try a little at a time...letting something go that u hold in...soon, it will be easy