She Left

[Always Hopeful]

She's finally gone.

 

After two weeks of extreme torture, being constantly barraged by her presense and peoples' requests for me to go to her send-off parties and dinners (5 in two weeks), my ex, the one I onced loved so much, and the one that I can't stand anymore, is finally gone. I will probably never see her again.

 

A small group of us went to dinner and then were joined later by a larger group at a bar. I felt like a caged animal by then. I stayed and stayed and stayed. But after awhile, I felt so suffocated and angry, that I had to go. As I was walking around the block, I decided to punch a couple of metal doors. Luckily my hand did not break, but it's all puffy and black and blue now. And you know, it felt GOOD!!!!

 

I went home. It was quiet and peaceful and the next day, the weather was perfect. It felt good to be home again.

 

Goodbye. I really did love you, and as the years go by, hopefully your anger and my anger will be tempered by wisdom and a fondness for the good times that got so lost amongst all the horrible times we had. Take care and live a good life. Above all else, learn to be kind. It is the one flaw that mars the diamond that is you, the flaw that ends up cutting and hurting others.

[crookster_man]

Good, very good. This is something that you needed to do. I hope that you can learn to forgiver her someday. Good endings make good beginnings.

Love and hate are two sides to the same coin. One is desired one is scorned. However, we cannot understand one without the other.

[Seraph]

Well done, man. I bet hitting that metal did feel good, yeah! You're showing alot of maturity here. Things are looking up for you! Good job.

 

Here's to the future, cheers!

[sana555]

very well put. so wise and inspiring. i hope to grow that far in my situation, but at least i can see it can happen... i can find peace in my life.

[Always Hopeful]

Thanks guys for the words of support. My hand is slowly, but surely healing. My heart and my mind will take a little more time. But it kinda feels like a toxin slowly exiting your system. It doesn't come out at once. It slowly leaches out.

 

Oh, and if you're going to hit something harder than your fists, don't use your dominant hand. Use the other one.

[crookster_man]

I to understand the stupidity that rage and emotions can do to you. I'm a very non-violent person, in fact I hate fighting unless in self-defence. Anyways I was so upset when I found out that one of my friends was sleeping with my GF that I freaked out, punched a few signs and put my fist through a window (ouch). After I stopped the bleeding (which took an hour) I looked at the mess that is my hand. It's healed now, was a few months ago. But the scars I have will last a very long time.

 

I think of them as reminders to the folly of letting my emotions control me. We are responsible for our actions no matter what state of mind we are in. That was the last time I let that ever happen to me. Hopefully, it will never happen again.