PutYourBackIntoIt Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 When do two people officially become boyfriend and girlfriend? I have been casually seeing this guy for a couple weeks. We have sooooooooo much fun together. He's perfect for me and we are both very attracted to one another. All the makings for a relationship are there. We go out, hang out and watch movies..etc. But when does it turn into a relationship? Do I ask him? Does he ask me? My last relationship..I asked the guy flat out if he was my boyfriend. Do I do this again? Or should I wait for the guy to ask me? Or do I just go with the flow of things now? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RayKay Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 When you decide as a couple that you don't want to date others and decide you are a couple. The time frame for this depends on every couple, I think it is more about the emotional investment than a particular time frame, personally. Generally, I would wait more than a couple weeks though, and just let things progress as it feels natural too. With my current partner, we decided to date exclusively a couple weeks in, but that was earlier for me than usual, and "officially" introduced ourselves as bf-gf a couple weeks after that though we were definitely both exclusive before that. But as I said, it really is something you need to feel out and decide together. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rms8 Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 A relationship becomes official when both parties agree that they are in a relationship. It's as simple as that. You should talk to your guy and see if he is ready for the next step. You could always ask him straight out if he would call you his girlfriend and if he wants that to be the case. Or you could say something about how you don't plan on seeing any other people anytime soon and don't want to. Then see if he agrees to be monogamous. It doesn't really matter how you do it as long as you get the point accross that you are focused on him and does he feel the same way. Good luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sally00 Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 A couple weeks of knowing him and dating is not enough to become a couple. That's what I think. I think you should wait a little longer and see what happens... see what he says. I have been friends with my boyfriend for over a year before we started dating. We dated for 2 1/2 weeks before it became official (on Valentine's day). I think that's different than your situation though because I already knew very well who my boyfriend was. We were just transitioning from friends to a couple. I don't think you should straight out ask this guy if you two are a couple. It might scare him off. Afterall, the guy's role is to make the move, ask the girl out officially... Maybe he is just waiting for the right timing. You don't want to throw that off and ruin it, do ya? Just wait. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cadence308 Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 I agree with other posters that a relationship becomes exclusive when both parties agree to be exclusive and not date others. I also think it depends on the emotional investment when that occurs. If you feel you are ready to make that step then ask the other person where they see the situation going between the two of you and ask them what they want. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DN Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 I think it was Annie24 who said she once said to a guy something like "I don't want to be seeing anybody else right now except you. How do you feel?" I may be misquoting and it may not have been Annie - but it is a good way to bring up the subject. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RayKay Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 I think it was Annie24 who said she once said to a guy something like "I don't want to be seeing anybody else right now except you. How do you feel?" I may be misquoting and it may not have been Annie - but it is a good way to bring up the subject. I said that to J....may have been me. Actually I said "You know, I am not really interested in seeing anyone else...how do you feel about that?". He felt good Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Bugg Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 One way to "feel him out" about where it's going..is to tell him you have a date with someone else. Until you and him are "exclusive" you are a free agent and available to date whomever you like. If he questions you or seems upset about it...he might want to be exclusive. If he's indifferent, then he's probably not ready yet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DN Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 I said that to J....may have been me. Actually I said "You know, I am not really interested in seeing anyone else...how do you feel about that?". He felt good Right - I knew it was someone wise. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DN Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 One way to "feel him out" about where it's going..is to tell him you have a date with someone else. Until you and him are "exclusive" you are a free agent and available to date whomever you like. If he questions you or seems upset about it...he might want to be exclusive. If he's indifferent, then he's probably not ready yet.Not often I disagree with LadyBugg but I do on this one. I would probably walk if someone said that to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Bugg Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 Hmmm..why? I know it sounds like game playing...but truthfully I think asking someone after a COUPLE weeks if you are exclusive .. is pressure. Dating is just that...dating. I think asking him if he's seeing anyone else ..is more appropriate than "are we exclusive"? OR..."will you call me your girlfriend"? Way too soon for that. I would wait at least a few more weeks before even bringing it up. That's just me though... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DN Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 If someone I was seeing said something like that I would assume that they were not particularly interested or were trying to make me compete. In either case, I would lose interest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
workaholic Posted August 1, 2006 Share Posted August 1, 2006 An encounter I came accross recently with one of my dates is that she didn't want to get into a relationship because she felt things would be complicated. HOW? We're spending time together. No sex involved, but we go out and do different things. If we're in a relationship, won't things pretty much stay the same? Why do people think that relationships are complicated once you get into them after dating for a while? Whenever I date I have to juggle work and school, but I've gotten used to it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WalkingWithGod Posted August 1, 2006 Share Posted August 1, 2006 Don't be so eager to jump into a committed relationship. There is not much you can do in a committed relationship that you can't do in a non committed relationship. I jumped into a committed relationship right at 23. We didn't break up until I was 26. I then took a while before I could date again. Anyways, if you jump into a committed relationship you are really going to limit your chances of meeting other people. If you are really that interested in him to cut off those chances then you need to be at very deep level of compatability and love which doesn't sound like you have reached with a couple of weeks of a casual relationship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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