ForAnother Posted July 13, 2006 Share Posted July 13, 2006 Just wrote these today... suppose something odd is on my mind. Hope you enjoy them. Motion I didn't think, like i ever would, and found myself sad this morning. Forgot to control this machine keep it in line. My memory will rattle the gears so you need to stay on me because I don't want to be sad. Untitled. Throw a guess toss a smile and you'll feel alright. Eat a secret drink your brain to dry your thoughts. Kiss your love lick your conscience to heal your wounds. Cry your heart and kill your blood if it leaks. Buckle up muscle your bones and learn to fake it. -ForAnother Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daddy Bear Posted July 13, 2006 Share Posted July 13, 2006 i liked them both a lot. the second one struck me as particularly well-crafted. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ForAnother Posted July 13, 2006 Author Share Posted July 13, 2006 Thank you. I myself enjoy my first one more... the less "organized" (quotes because, organization is debatable in terms of poetry) a poem is, the more I like it. Again thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AwdreeHpburn Posted July 13, 2006 Share Posted July 13, 2006 ForAnother - I liked them both a lot but I too liked the first one for the reasons you said. I am usually a disorganised thinker and really like scattered poetry.... You're really talented. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ForAnother Posted July 13, 2006 Author Share Posted July 13, 2006 Thank you. You're too kind. -ForAnother Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yeawutever Posted July 13, 2006 Share Posted July 13, 2006 Both poems were wonderful. The first was the nice use of structure and on the second the great use of scene imagery. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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