This sucks

[brickchamp]

Well, this sucks. I just found out my ex was texting someone else for like 2 hours straight tonight....I knew the excuse he gave me was a crock of poop. I almost cried, but I kept it together. It was just better to think he was alone thinking he'd made a mistake...so much for that! He didn't waste any time. I'm sure he's telling her he loves her so much and needs her just like he did with me.... What a scumbag! Ok, I'm done.

[ToxiC SweateR]

Well do you know what he said verbatum? Or are you just assuming?

[brickchamp]

I'm just assuming he's met someone else. Texting was our primary mode of communication, and at first, he texted me all the time. Plus, it doesn't seem to me like he'd be texting a male buddy for two hours, you know?

[friscodj]

OK, two things:

 

1) It is very common to think that because your ex is seeing someone else, they are over you. I can tell you that relationships have ended for me and the very next day I was finding dates for the weekend. You know why? Because I needed someone to fill in for my ex! Relationships create routines and comfort zones for people. And usually when people start seeking out dates right away after a break up, it means they haven't faced reality yet, are trying to avoid it, and have not even started to move on yet.

 

2) Can I ask you how you found this out? And then I will ask you why you want to know such things! Step number 1 is to disa-freaking-pear. And that goes both ways, you don't make contact and you don't receive contact, even if it is secondhand...

 

I know your story well and I think the man is weak, needy, immature, and above all...not for you! So quit knowing anything about his life already!

[ToxiC SweateR]

Yeah but still, even though he USED to text you, doesn't mean he's going to anymore. Sure, he might have said it, but he might not have meant it. I agree with Frisco on this one, this guy is not for you. Focus on the future, forget the past, and forget regret.

[brickchamp]

Yes, you know it well....more than you'd like I'm sure! Okay, seriously, you know I wouldn't lie to you...I HAVE "disafreakingpeared!" I have not contacted him or seen him in three weeks, even though I've had ample opportunity to. The way I found out is that someone who traveled with him today called me to ask if it was ME he'd texted the whole way down there...groannnnnnn. I was like thanks a LOT for letting me know this!! I SO didn't need to hear it. I had to say NO it wasn't me, and I felt like I was gonna throw up. But it passed quickly thank God.

[ToxiC SweateR]

Yes, you know it well....more than you'd like I'm sure! Okay, seriously, you know I wouldn't lie to you...I HAVE "disafreakingpeared!" I have not contacted him or seen him in three weeks, even though I've had ample opportunity to. The way I found out is that someone who traveled with him today called me to ask if it was ME he'd texted the whole way down there...groannnnnnn. I was like thanks a LOT for letting me know this!! I SO didn't need to hear it. I had to say NO it wasn't me, and I felt like I was gonna throw up. But it passed quickly thank God.

 

Just because he was texting (or doing something that resembled it) doesn't mean he in fact was "hooking up" so to speak. I know that when my ex and I broke up, I thought every text message she got was from a guy trying to bark up her tree! Just don't jump to conclusions. It will all get better.

[friscodj]

Well, use these "surprise attacks" as a way to test your armor for this weekend...

 

Yeah, there will be more nauseating moments sorry to say. And the demons that whisper to you that he is doing great, so happy without you, totally forgot about you, with someone better now, and you'll be alone, miserable, and wrapped up in him for the rest of time will revisit you as well...and you may have to just go ahead and tell those guys to f-off...

 

But seriously now, you are really making something out of nothing here. You have no idea at all who he was texting. No idea. And let's keep it that way...

 

Stay the course here kid! Keep telling yourself over and over again he is not for you...and believe it... Realize that even if he does meet someone else, she'll be a rebound, you'll be way better than her, and he's going to be the same person who does the same things as when he was with you...

[friscodj]

forget regret.

 

Great line...catchy and true...I'm stealing it...

[brickchamp]

Well, use these "surprise attacks" as a way to test your armor for this weekend...

 

Yeah, there will be more nauseating moments sorry to say. And the demons that whisper to you that he is doing great, so happy without you, totally forgot about you, with someone better now, and you'll be alone, miserable, and wrapped up in him for the rest of time will revisit you as well...and you may have to just go ahead and tell those guys to f-off...

 

Bwhahahahah, ROFLMAO! I hate those little demons....they've been bugging the crap out of me, and yes, I believe I WILL tell them to "f-off!!!!" RIGHT NOW! hahahaha

Great advice!

[joyce1412]

okay, so everyone's already told you that your ex is a loser, don't worry about it, blah blah blah. but you know what else? rebounds have the lowest success rates of any relationships on the planet. she really is just going to fill the void you left, as it was said, if there even is a "she" to begin with. anyway, this lucky girl is going to get the benefit of constantly being compared to you, his last love--SOOOO lucky, right?

 

don't be jealous of the new ho, it's seriously pointless. when i first started thinking (with horror) of my ex hooking up with other girls, it drove me up a wall every time. but the trick was, i started to make myself FOLLOW THROUGH all the way with those fantasies. for example, i COULD think of him having sex with some random chick on the road (he's a musician), and it being spontaneous, exciting, whatever. but then i thought about how it would go afterwards--the awkward putting-on of the clothes, probably accompanied by a lot of drunken stumbling, the half-hearted offer for her to stay the night, him feeling ridiculously lonely and empty afterward, having to leave to another city six hours later...et cetera. and that's not fantasy, that's REALITY. so, was i really going to sit around and be jealous of THAT? please.

 

you can sort of fill in the blanks and make your own storyline...point being, any girls he gets with for the next few months will just be a PATHETIC hookup, as most of them are, but breakup hookups are particularly pathetic for both parties. you can even be GLAD that he might be seeing other girls, because he'll probably strike out for a while and remember how rare it truly is to find a girl as great as you. don't kid yourself about the relationships he's going to have anytime soon, because they're going to be empty. period.

[chemica]

Yeah but still, even though he USED to text you, doesn't mean he's going to anymore. Sure, he might have said it, but he might not have meant it. I agree with Frisco on this one, this guy is not for you. Focus on the future, forget the past, and forget regret.

 

This post really says it all.

 

What a shock, your ex doesn't talk to you anymore. Crazy new concept? I can understand how this is hurtful, but if you go on worrying about this kind of crap you will never be happy. If the relationship was working, he wouldn't be your ex.

[mba1]

but you know what else? rebounds have the lowest success rates of any relationships on the planet. she really is just going to fill the void you left, as it was said, if there even is a "she" to begin with. anyway, this lucky girl is going to get the benefit of constantly being compared to you, his last love--SOOOO lucky, right?

 

for example, i COULD think of him having sex with some random chick on the road (he's a musician), and it being spontaneous, exciting, whatever. but then i thought about how it would go afterwards--the awkward putting-on of the clothes, probably accompanied by a lot of drunken stumbling, the half-hearted offer for her to stay the night, him feeling ridiculously lonely and empty afterward, having to leave to another city six hours later...et cetera. and that's not fantasy, that's REALITY. so, was i really going to sit around and be jealous of THAT? please.

 

point being, any girls he gets with for the next few months will just be a PATHETIC hookup, as most of them are, but breakup hookups are particularly pathetic for both parties. you can even be GLAD that he might be seeing other girls, because he'll probably strike out for a while and remember how rare it truly is to find a girl as great as you. don't kid yourself about the relationships he's going to have anytime soon, because they're going to be empty. period.

 

 

joyce is soo on point with all the above comments. i recall my ex-whatever you want to call him doing the same thing... and i was thinking to myself, what the h*ll??? how could he have forgotten about me and REPLACE me so soon?

 

point is, as frisco and joyce have already made - he hasn't and he's passing the time with distractions so he doesn't have to face nor deal with reality.

 

and think about it this way... if he really has REPLACED you so soon ask yourself this.... what type of guy can so readily and supeficially forget one love and have another so quickly???

 

my answer...someone who's love isn't worth a damn in the first place!

 

yet another reason why ladies and gentlemen of my i have NEVER EVER rebounded