Im so hurt right now i don't know what to do!! please help me!!!

[caligurl]

Hey everyone i need some help. I've known this guy for a year now and i've always liked him but everyone told me he was a player. Well now we've gotten together. We've been together for almost a month. It's been really cool. He got me a necklace and no ones ever gotten me anything. and one night about a week and a half ago he started crying because earlier that day i was telling my dad how much ive been wanting a car and all this stuff. and he started crying saying "i can't get or a car or anything you want, i'm a nobody." and i looked at him and told him i don't care about the money or gifts or anything i said all i care about is you... and he tells me he misses me when he's not around me. he calls me all the time... but now here's my problem... he's in jail right now for only 50 days. i went and seen him earlier too. but anyways, he just called me and we were talking and i said that i was gonna go hang out with my new friend alison....he started saying "oh well things are different now and i've been hearing stuff about you that i didn't wanna hear." i heard that you were a hoe" and i got so hurt i started crying but i didn't let him know and then he changed the subject. and then he asked me if i was gonna go and hang out with my friend and i said "no i don't know now" and he said " oh well i hope it wasn't anything i said" i said no. and to tell you the truth i've been hurt my whole life and i've never been in a healthy relationship, and to tell you the truth, i did sleep around but not because i wanted to but because i was always lonely. i would sleep with a guy the first night and always hoped that he would stay with me, i was raped a couple of the times. and then i gained strenghth and havent' been with anybody in a year and now i'm so confused i had forgotten what love feels like. and when he said that he heard of me being a hoe, i knew what he was talking about. i'm scared. should i tell him the truth??? if he leaves me does that mean he doesn't understand me?? i don't know what to believe anymore. and on the phone earlier he even kept saying he misses me and stuff. and i had told him not to hurt me...because i don't wanna get hurt again. can somebody please help me?!? i just can' t stop crying. i'm hurt so bad.

[ElektraHere]

Honey the first thing is what are you doing with a guy who is serving time???? Leave his sorry butt in jail and dont be around when he gets out.

What a jerk!!!!

[GottaLetItBurn]

So you have given yourself away because you have very low self esteem. Things change and situations come up for you to grow and make smart decisions, yet you go out with someone who is in jail. You need to get rid of him, and trust me this guy is no player. He is emotional and spills his guts, that is not a player..he is soft. You need to go and find a real man, because this guy is going to drag you down.

 

It's obvious that a lot of scandalous men have wronged you in your life, and I'm sorry. I wish I could take all that pain away. You should really get rid off this guy. Being lonely for a while and hurting is better in the long run because you can reflect and become stonger. Staying with this guy will drag you emotionally through the mud. You need to tell yourself that the next time you talk to him you are going to say "Don't call or text me, it is over". LIe and say you found someone else, just get away from him.

[annie24]

he's in jail right now for only 50 days

 

this man sounds like bad bad news.

 

what did he do to get stuck in jail?

 

I agree with the others, you are worth more than this. you deserve a man who isn't in jail and doesn't call you a ho. my goodness. you deserve A LOT more than what you've been getting.

 

stay away from this guy. he sounds bad.

[asianlkp22]

Just to let you know right now....my ex husband was in and out of jail, I waited for him and still a dissappointment. He too was considered a player, and a lot of jealous people out there called me a player too before anyone and had rumours to keep me from him.

 

Just to let you know right now, get out now, before you are in deeper and you can't get out of it.

 

I am divorced now from him and have a new boyfriend that doesn't go to jail or anything like that.

 

REthink the BROAD out look on this....so what you did what you did in the past, people are going to talk, who gives, if you don't believe that you are one, then there's your answer.

 

Plus, you only have known him for a month.....this will be easy for you to leave and be STRONG and CONFIDENT.....have more self-esteem in yourself.....there are plenty of GOOD MEN out there for ya.

[Momene]

We had this conversation on the BBC board (England). Lots more young people these days go through promiscuous periods when between relationships, yet remain totally faithful when in one.

 

Tell him yes you did sleep around once but you won't while you're together.

 

If he can't accept that, tell the jailer to throw away the keys!

[confused25]

I don't think this guy is good for you, I think you deserve someone better. Don't give up hope yet! There will be other guys out there that will treat you the way that you should be treated.

[Aschleigh]

I can only imagine that jail is very stressful and that he may be taking out this stress on you by accusing you of things. If he's in jail for anything violent , he probably has an anger problem and that might be behind the stuff he is saying. Either way it has little to do with you.

Find someone who eventually you feel comfortable telling anything to and who doesn't judge you for anything. Find someone who can actually LOVE you. It feels so good and you deserve it.