aggierocker Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 Can being worried make a person off sync. Im worried I may ve lost a friend. Link to comment
Scout Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 Is this something your mom requested you do? Do you feel guilty because you're pissed about having to do it? Link to comment
nottoogreen Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 Im out in this neighborhood passing out fliers for a jehovahs witness convention. I feel bad doing something i dont believe in. You are 19 years old. You do not have to do this if you do not want to. In order for you to be strong, you must learn to follow your senses and your heart. Link to comment
aggierocker Posted June 21, 2006 Author Share Posted June 21, 2006 It makes my mom happy and that has benefits. Im pissed at her for forcing me into this situation. Link to comment
BellaDonna Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 AggieRocker, Do you still live at home? If so, Are you working? Do you have a plan to be independent in the near future? What about college- and living on a campus away from home? I can understand that dissent from the religion you were raised in may cause your mother to be very upset. However, if you can live on your own, you will get less grief from your mom because you won't be around her as much. It appears that you may be shunned for choosing not to participate: link removed You are an adult and can make your own decisions now. Have you ever had a heart-to-heart talk with your mom and told her your feelings about this? BellaDonna Link to comment
aggierocker Posted June 21, 2006 Author Share Posted June 21, 2006 Yes to all of the above. She just has that extra useful money. Link to comment
ElektraHere Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 Then either stand by what you believe in or stand by the $$$$. You have choices!!!!! Link to comment
nottoogreen Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 Concur with ElektraHere. You want to stay out of situations which down you though. Also, there are other jobs out there. Get going, once you are rolling it only get's easier. Link to comment
Scout Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 Yes to all of the above. She just has that extra useful money. Aggie, I hope one day you will not give the idea of money the importance you how do. You can see how it makes you sell yourself out. You've played "confidante" to your father over his affair with his girlfriend, so you can get money. You are passing out flyers over a religion you disagree with because of money. We come into this world with our soul, and that's the only thing we leave with. At any point in your life, if you can't say you stayed true to your soul, you are going to be a very miserable person who has a hard time even looking at himself. And I think you're already struggling with some real issues regarding self-respect. This could be one of the reasons why. You put yourself in situations you feel incredibly uncomfortable in, simply to get some kind of temporary reward. This is no way to live, my friend. You can do better. It would also help if you would stick through most of your threads, so we can better work through these issues for you as they arise. Just saying so in advance based on my past experience posting on your numerous threads. Link to comment
aggierocker Posted June 21, 2006 Author Share Posted June 21, 2006 I feel I cant get out of this on my own. My dad isnt really into the religion but he still goes to shut mom up. Link to comment
BellaDonna Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 What do you think would happen if you didn't go? BellaDonna Link to comment
ElektraHere Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 Aggie ~ If you ever expect to get on with your own life and actually achieve things you must THINK for yourself. I have seen MANY posts from you asking questions about what you should do, say, how you should wear your hair, etc. It's time you embrace being an adult and start making the desicions as one. Link to comment
Scout Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 The way to get out of this isn't going to be an overnight process, but there is a way to get out of it. First, you need to move out on your own. Get college loans and a better paying job with more hours. Plenty of people, myself included, put themselves through college this way. As long as you are dependent on your mother and father for shelter and money, you are going to be forced to do things you don't want to do and that make you miserable. What seems to be holding you back? Do you fear you can't take care of yourself? It's normal to have those fears at your age. And yeah, you might make some mistakes or stumble along the way...in fact, you very likely will. The trick is to just keep getting back up on your feet, and not let fear of failure get in your way. Link to comment
Scout Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 And let me tell you something else...if you put yourself through college, your parents won't be able to hold putting you through after you graduate! Oh yes, if you think the guilt trips are gonna stop after you graduate, you're wrong. When you won't want to go to a Jehovah's Witness meeting or something with your mom, watch how fast she'll say, "And to think we put forward so much money to put you through college, you can't even do this one thing for me." But - she can't say or do those things if you have supported yourself. Link to comment
aggierocker Posted June 21, 2006 Author Share Posted June 21, 2006 I wouldnt get money. I have a car note, loans, books to buy, and a house to pay for this fall. Im helping dad pay the bills. Im worried. Are silly ideas worth it? Link to comment
nottoogreen Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 It's time you embrace being an adult and start making the desicions as one. Please think about what Elektra and other said. Me thinks part of your problem is mom living in a fantasy world. You are young and got to grow up. Please be stronger. Link to comment
Scout Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 I wouldnt get money. I have a car note, loans, books to buy, and a house to pay for this fall. Im helping dad pay the bills. Im worried. Are silly ideas worth it? Loans and Pell grants can pay for school and books. Loans can be paid back after you graduate, for as little as $150 to $200 a month. If your car payment is too high, trade it in for a cheaper payment, or sell it and buy a very used car. Also, bike around as much as you can, this will get you in great shape and exercise like this will also release all kinds of wonderful endorphins that elevate your mood. What do you mean you have a house to pay for this fall? Do not buy a house right now, that's chaining yourself to more debt. Another thing, you could always take a year off from school to work full-time and save up money, or even travel for a year. There are many websites where you can find "volunteer" or "intern" jobs working on eco-farms and such around the world. What an adventure that would be! (And a great way to snip the apron strings.) Link to comment
nottoogreen Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 I wouldnt get money. I have a car note, loans, books to buy, and a house to pay for this fall. Im helping dad pay the bills. Im worried. Are silly ideas worth it? You are worth it. Also Scout made some more good suggestions. Please consider change in your life for your future. No need to be a depressed sitting duck doing drugs to forget... Link to comment
Scout Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 Aggie, here is a wonderful website that can direct you to jobs around the world for young students (or probably, for anyone of any age). The jobs are very outdoorsish/socially responsible. This could be the answer to your current dilemmas...travel and get a new perspective from seeing the much bigger world around you, save up some money, and get away from your parents. Many of these jobs provide housing, too. Check it out! link removed Link to comment
ElektraHere Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 Aggie, I work fulltime and go to school fulltime. I also have car payments, rent payments, other bills, and I am doing it. I am alot older than you to. I am using the student loans to further me in school. Yes I will have to pay on them in the future but its well worth it in my book. This may sound harsh but you need to grow up, quit * * * * *ing, and just do it. That is if you want the life YOU want to lead. Link to comment
itsallgrand Posted June 21, 2006 Share Posted June 21, 2006 Aggie, I hope it is alright for me to post this link and it doesn't get wiped out. link removed I have a dear friend who was raised JW. This site helped him a lot. He was 21 when he finally decided to leave the religion. I understand how difficult it is, the unique circumstances it presents. The others have given great practical advice and encouragement. I think it may help you to work through some of your spiritual and world beliefs: find out what it is that YOU believe apart from what you have been taught. Take a gander at the site. It offers many perspectives. Good luck. Link to comment
aggierocker Posted June 22, 2006 Author Share Posted June 22, 2006 Ive been to those sites. So a friend and I were drinking tonight. We were talking about religion and even he said if you believe for yourself, it betters 10x. Link to comment
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