Online and Questions

[nftw]

................

[ElektraHere]

I hate to be a downer but I wouldnt put all your eggs in one basket. I too met someone online. First we were occasional hellos, then it moved to IM's they start to get heated (yes cyber sex), then we started talking on the phone.We talked for hours and hours about anything from how are day was to music to sex. I was falling for him but I was just a fantasy. He and I eventually met and I was ready for him and a relationship and he was done with it all. He broke my heart and spirit.

 

All I can say is watch your heart. LDR are hard and they are especially hard when its an online LDR.

[monkey1]

This kind sounds like he's not ready for a relationship. I mean in general it's hard to be with someone who doesn't express their feelings well like you do, but he on the other hand is similiar to you because he can't give a straight answer, or kind of beats around the bush about things.

 

I think your "clear" answer is he doesn't seem to be "clear" up to now about how he feels about you or what he defines what your relationship is. I think if someone wants to be with you, they'll know how to express it and not be so wishy washy about it.

 

I think I'd just leave him as a friend I talk to once in a while, or stop talking to him all together. I don't think he's a winner here.

[ElektraHere]

This kind sounds like he's not ready for a relationship. I mean in general it's hard to be with someone who doesn't express their feelings well like you do, but he on the other hand is similiar to you because he can't give a straight answer, or kind of beats around the bush about things.

 

I think your "clear" answer is he doesn't seem to be "clear" up to now about how he feels about you or what he defines what your relationship is. I think if someone wants to be with you, they'll know how to express it and not be so wishy washy about it.

 

I think I'd just leave him as a friend I talk to once in a while, or stop talking to him all together. I don't think he's a winner here.

 

Monkey where were you when I needed you???? ;-)

[nftw]

Hello,

Thanks a lot for your answers..

Well, first of all, i didnt expect these kind of answers..

I tought with all the things I said, it was a kewl cyber relation i was living..

 

i know he isnt ready. And I am not either anyway...

We live our things on the internet day by day...

 

i just wanted to... i dont know..

im kinda down right now..

 

when 2 person say to each other they are close and have something real...

but, some ppl who are outside hear about it and tell you to completely drop it..

 

i dont know anymore..

[ElektraHere]

Hello,

Thanks a lot for your answers..

Well, first of all, i didnt expect these kind of answers..

I tought with all the things I said, it was a kewl cyber relation i was living..

 

i know he isnt ready. And I am not either anyway...

We live our things on the internet day by day...

 

i just wanted to... i dont know..

im kinda down right now..

 

when 2 person say to each other they are close and have something real...

but, some ppl who are outside hear about it and tell you to completely drop it..

 

i dont know anymore..

 

Hun,

 

I was in your place. My guy was not my b/f nor did he ever admit to it. However, we crossed the line of a casual online relationship. When you cyber or have phone sex. Or even when you get closer like I did and actually sleep with them it is crossing the casual line.

 

You must do what you must. Just be careful with your heart. I wasnt and gave it to someone who was not deserving of it.

 

We are no longer friends which is a sad fact but a must. SO if you are willing to risk it all then go ahead but you may just lose it it all in the end.

[annie24]

when 2 person say to each other they are close and have something real...

but, some ppl who are outside hear about it and tell you to completely drop it..

 

well... you may have something real online....

 

but it is not real until you meet in person! you never know if you have that same chemistry offline. it is important to meet in person before pinning too many hopes and dreams to a screenname.

 

we say this because a lot of us have been there. get along well online, meet in person, and it's a disaster. or he could be Mr. Right!

 

either way, gotta move things to the next level (ie, meet in person), or just drop it.

[monkey1]

Monkey where were you when I needed you???? ;-)

 

Huh?

 

nftw ... I don't know, I mean people here can only give advice based on our personal experiences or just what we think with the information given. You probably have a better idea about this guy and your situation than anyone else does.

 

Cyber relationships are/can be very confusing and hard to deal with so you're not alone. It's hard, ha even when it's a face to face relationship, to figure out how the other person feels. The easiest/hardest way to find out is to just ask straight out. It's hard because you may not hear what you want, but the best way to find out is not beating around the bush and just ask.

 

People do find love online and it varies. sometimes you find a close great friend and sometimes you find your partner.

 

And as already suggested, just be careful with how you go about dealing with this. You deserve, as anyone, to be with someone who loves you and wants to be with you without a doubt in their mind.