Muzik Posted June 8, 2006 Share Posted June 8, 2006 "you act like we are still going out.." "so...whats wrong with that" she tells me that she doesnt know how to act with me. she loves me and wants to be with me but she said she will hurt me again. last night she told me that everyday she wants to call me and tell me that she wants to get back together with me. i pour my heart out to her telling her "i want to be with you but i really do want you to be happy and if your not happy with me then dont bother" there are these two girls that like me, but i have told her i dont want them and i want just her. she gets so pissed when i talk to them even if its just "hey wutsup...oh nuthing just hanging out, and yourself" she asks and asks for my myspace password and i ask her why and shes said just to have it, and i told her BS and said truthfully why. "just to see what your saying" and i got a little mad and she said your right i trust you. like i said we are "broken up" and i said "what do u mean trust me?" "like if your talking about sexual stuff or flirting" of course im happy that shes like that cos its shows me she cares...right? im really confuesed constantly thinking if we will ever get back together, i really do want her back and would do anything to be with her, shes amazing and beautiful and i cant picture my life without her. i read a few of these post of the "NC"(no contact") i told her last night after she said she doesnt know how to act with me, that im just going to go away. she told me she would NEVER forgive me if i left her. I REALLY DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO...please someone help me? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melrich Posted June 8, 2006 Share Posted June 8, 2006 You've answered your own question. You two need a break from each other and that includes a break in all contact. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Muzik Posted June 8, 2006 Author Share Posted June 8, 2006 but i dont want her to hate me, i mean i want to be with her. shes calling me later tonight...just dont answer...i just feel horible that i would be doing that, just cause i know i would hate it if she did that to me... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RandomAdvisor Posted June 8, 2006 Share Posted June 8, 2006 she told me she would NEVER forgive me if i left her. Um, what? You two aren't even together anymore. You're under no obligation to stay with her. You don't say so but I get the impression she dumped you, right? So now she wants the benefits of being in a relationship with you without actually being in one. Meanwhile, if something better comes along she can drop you like a hot potato and move on to someone else guilt free. Stop letting her use you like an emotional tampon and go to no contact. I wouldn't want someone like her as a friend, let alone a lover. Do you have classes with her? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Muzik Posted June 8, 2006 Author Share Posted June 8, 2006 hah yeah she did dump me. thats the thing last night she told me that she DOESNT want to be with anyone ever again. she told me that she had a bad day and i asked why and she said i was thinking about "us" anf if i made the right decsion. i told her its out of my control i cant force her to be with me. no we go to diff schools. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melrich Posted June 8, 2006 Share Posted June 8, 2006 but i dont want her to hate me, i mean i want to be with her. shes calling me later tonight...just dont answer...i just feel horible that i would be doing that, just cause i know i would hate it if she did that to me... I wouldn't just cut her off without any explanation. Sit down with her and explain that neither of you are moving on and this is not good. That it's best that you don't see each other or talk to each other anymore so that you each have a chance to get over the relationship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Muzik Posted June 8, 2006 Author Share Posted June 8, 2006 yeah i guess...i dont want to move on i want her back, but theres nothing i can do...thanks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bethany Posted June 8, 2006 Share Posted June 8, 2006 Melrich is right. Every day you stay like this she just hurts you and keeps you and your emotions dangling. I know you don't want to leave but things can't stay this way, can they? She made the decision to end it now it's your turn to take control of the situation. You have to tell her to let you go. Only then can things change for you both. Hopefully through a period of NC, she will miss you and she will wake up to the fact she wants you back as her BF again. But more importantly than that, it will give YOU a chance to heal, which can only be a good thing. Give yourself a little time to yourself and center yourself and ask her to respect your wishes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RandomAdvisor Posted June 8, 2006 Share Posted June 8, 2006 Tell her that you don't want to speak to her again unless she decides she wants a relationship with you. You'd be surprised how quickly that helps her decide she wants you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thegirl_00 Posted June 8, 2006 Share Posted June 8, 2006 Shes keeping her guns pointed at you buddy... get away form her fast. I know women like her type. She holding on to you, but only by a thread because she doesn't want you to get involved with anyone because it'll make her jealous. But on the flip side she doesnt want to be with you (hense that she broke up with you) She wants you to keep begging her to go out with you because she wants to keep her options open. I would bet that if there were guys who liked her she wouldn't hesitate to talk to them and hang out with them, but she would still tell you she "wants to be with you". She sounds confused and you don't need to get caught up in the confusion. Go no contact right away and explain to her that it hurts you to be stay in contact with her when you can't have her, or w/e works best for you. Good luck Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Muzik Posted June 8, 2006 Author Share Posted June 8, 2006 yeah all fo you are right. i just dont want to hear it lol. i WANT to do the no contact, im just afraid it will back fire. hopefully it will work today would have been our 1 year, i guess im just really hurting right now, iv never felt like this about someone and i dont want it to be with someone else. i have had many other realtionships befor her and i havnt felt comfortable with them. with her i can be myself and i know that she hurts me but i always defend her. once she starts crying i give in, and i know when i talk to her adn tell her about the NC she will cry and i just dont know how to handle that... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rnorth Posted June 8, 2006 Share Posted June 8, 2006 You know what, do what you want to do. If its in your heart to get back together, then do it. If you don't know, then take space. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RandomAdvisor Posted June 8, 2006 Share Posted June 8, 2006 How could it backfire? You tell her you dont want to speak to her again, you get her out of her life, should be end of story unless you are forced to see each other (IE, work in the same place, or have classes together). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bebecole Posted June 8, 2006 Share Posted June 8, 2006 that damn myspace is nothing but trouble!!! you guys need so time apart to figure out yourselves Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Muzik Posted June 8, 2006 Author Share Posted June 8, 2006 i mean backfire as she sees that she never needed me or wants nothing to do with me. she wants to be with me but is afraid she will hurt me thats the only problem right now. so i fig NC and she will learn that she really does need me or...what im afraid of, she moves on... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thegirl_00 Posted June 8, 2006 Share Posted June 8, 2006 well she broke up with YOU so don't be the sucker who tries to hold on to a thread to get her back because it very rarely works. Your WAY better off going no contact. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Muzik Posted June 8, 2006 Author Share Posted June 8, 2006 yeah ill do that. she teases me too much and i just get more adn more confused everyday. she wants to hang out 2mrrw and she told me she would wear her "sluty skit" and i said" cool" and she got pissed and would get in this mood adn only give one word answers. and i told her to stop and iasked whats wrong and shes said all u said was cool u didnt even play along... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GottaLetItBurn Posted June 8, 2006 Share Posted June 8, 2006 Both your feeling will change, you will want to see other people. This girl is just immature and clingy, I would get away from her. She just wants to keep you around until she finds someone better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Muzik Posted June 9, 2006 Author Share Posted June 9, 2006 i know she sounds like that but thts the thing out, its like she may be immature and clingy but i still love her and i still want to be with her. i DONT want to be with anyone else and im stupid for wanting to have her back but i cant live without her Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brando Posted June 9, 2006 Share Posted June 9, 2006 Do you really believe you cannot live without her. ??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Muzik Posted June 9, 2006 Author Share Posted June 9, 2006 yeah...shes just ewverything i ever wanted. i know this is stupid and you are guna say thers other people out ther for you, but i dotn want anyone else and she wants to be with me too, shes just scared shes going to hurt me again and this her not getting back together with me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brando Posted June 9, 2006 Share Posted June 9, 2006 I am not doubting your feelings, just be careful right now belieivng you need her so badly...it will hinder your healing process... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Muzik Posted June 9, 2006 Author Share Posted June 9, 2006 yeah i get what you mean. i just watn to talk to her soo badly and i don want to do the NC she wants to hang out. i mean she tells me she wants to be alone with me all the time and she likes being with me cos she can be herself we talk for like 8hours a day and never get sick of each other, i just watn her back so badly Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thegirl_00 Posted June 9, 2006 Share Posted June 9, 2006 Well you asked us for advice and we gave our two scents, but only you can make the decision. Hope you at least took some of this into concideration because a lot of us here trying to help you have experienced the same problem and don't want you to dig yourself in a deeper hole. Good luck Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Muzik Posted June 9, 2006 Author Share Posted June 9, 2006 i know and i thank you for your help. my friend saw that i was on this web page and he went and blabed it to her. he was telling her that all when i told her im happy we are friends and that "You’re right, I don’t think either of us have been happy and I can see why it’s ending. Of course I’d like to stay together and work on the problems, but there’s no point if it’s only me that wants it so I can see that this is for the best"(thank you majord23) was all from this page, she told him that "you" guys dont know her and how can u make a jugment on this realtionship....so i got in big trouble there. And im not gunna lie it did work. she told me that she felt horrible and that she doesnt know why i said that and that she wants me back...so im slowly getting there...thanks! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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