Too nervous to eat

[lllquid]

double post edit

[Jennster]

I used to be that way big time back in high school. I'd get super nervous my stomach would literally ache so bad. It got to the point where I had to take dramamine everyday to calm my stomach...it was all because I had this silly crush on this guy I saw at school. I stayed that way for a long time...I rarely get that nervous anymore but when I do my eating is the first thing affected. I'm not sure what to tell ya other than try to cope and you'll get over it

[AwdreeHpburn]

Illquid - Welcome! You're certainly not alone on this one! I USED to have that problem, of not being able to eat when too nervous.

 

You're right going out to dinner is a good way of getting to know someone but there are plenty of others that don't involve food. While you can't avoid going out for a meal forever, initial dates could be spent doing something more active.

 

Go to a zoo.

 

Watch a sporting game.

 

Go to a pool hall/bowling alley/casino

 

Get creative - and this could win extra points anyway and could buy time until you're more comfortable.

[TheWriter1]

wow this really speaks to me because my stomach is a mess of anxiety. You know how some people sweat when nervous...some people get headaches, well i get stomachaches...bad ones. It feels like im trapped, and when im trapped things start to bubble and i feel as if ill either throw up, or have to go to the bathroom. I usually just take an immodium when im having a crappy day but unfortunatley that stops my digestive tract completely so i can't very well rely on those for the rest of my life. I honestly have no idea what you can do. I responded just to tell you that you weren't alone and that if you can find an answer...more people than you think would love to hear it.

 

And to people who just say chill out and breath deeply...well...that doesn't exactly work.

[Mix Maxster]

And to people who just say chill out and breath deeply...well...that doesn't exactly work.

 

actually it does if you know how to do it properly. In the situation where she's right infront of you it makes it hard. But all it takes is a little pause and about a good half minute to do. I will look straight, look in my peripheral view of vision, feel the flow of air going into my nose while feeling my stomach and chest expanding and releasing. I find that by noticing those three things and making sure to concetrate on those three things, that the anxiety and nervousness subsides quite a bit. It helps you to gain focus on the situation and pay more attention to her than yourself, which I find is where the anxiety usually comes from.

 

I've found that I often will still have this problem, but by using that technique it definitely has helped. Also when you start to remove the general "worries" or things that cause the anxiety to begin with (typically a thought about the present situation that takes over all other mental faculties) that you'll soon realize how "dumb" it is to focus on those things and pay more attention to the situation and feeling that as opposed to worrying about the past or future. You may wonder how all this plays into it, but you'd be surprised.

[Markers]

for me this happens because I'm too busy talking with her.. go for coffee, no eating involved? sipping coffee is easy and quick, and you don't have to really drink anything if you don't want to.. Also it does not involve any tricky dishes like.. spaghetti.. no idea how I would eat that on a date..