i want her back!

[nate321]

Well i met this girl (whitney) about 8 months ago. I am in love with her very much and she loved me or least thats what she said these past 8 months and she showed it so i believe that she did. Well this past week she went out of town and we didn see each other on the weekend like we ussaly do but we chat on the internet and she told me that she missed me so much that she felt like she was dying and that she loved me so much.

ok so then the next week roles around and she acting kind of weird but so was i. i was a lil stressed over job issues. she is acting distant like when i talk to her, her response is just like one or two words answers there was really no conversation going on and i nocticed when she was talking to other peaple she was laughing and talkin back. so i confronted her about it. when i told her she was like really well we will talk about it later.

i told her that i was tired of hurting and i didn like expressing my feelings to her not know if she felt the same way but i would if i had to. when she wrote back it was bad she said " nathan i do love you and im scared of losing you but i think my feelings are changing. i just need some time and i dont think i need a boyfriend i just dont know what i want im not sayin we wont ever date again i just need some time." that hurt so bad becuz i love her so much.

well that night came and i know i done i all the wrong things i called her and we only talked a little. so i sent her an email i know i should not have done that i kept calling and kept emailing. sunday hurt alot so i called her agiian and around the end of our convo i started crying and i said "i just want to be apart of your life, and i want you so bad. there was really no response. that afternoon someone told me if you want her back dont chase her. so i havent called her since and it as now been a week but i have talked to hr a little everyday when i see her. i also got on the internet to night and i didn say nothin to her but she said hey to me and we talked and she was into the convo. but do i need to talk to her to get her back? and when she wants to talk how do i go about it. i am willing to do anything to get this girl back! any advice at all would help the most. please i truly love her and dont wont to push her away!

[friscodj]

Oh man, Nathan, this post sure sounds like me in a few past relationships. I have some thing to say to you:

 

1) There is nothing worse than being madly in love with a woman, she in love with you, and then suddenly having her flake out and start getting confused. The lesson I learned the hard way was when a woman starts having doubts, telling you she loves you but needs time, is not sure anymore...run. Don't walk, don't wait for things to change, you run my brother...

 

2) Why do you want this woman back? Do you want to be the only one really in this relationship? Why do you want to be with someone whose heart isn't in it? You've got to think of the big picture here outside of your heart.

 

3) There's nothing worse than a woman who doesn't want to be with a guy (or isn't sure, whatever) and having him crying and pleading to be part of her life. You do this sort of thing in private. She knows how you feel about her. All your crying and pleading is doing is confusing her more. Sure this might "win" her back but the reconciliation will be short-lived and based on your efforts to get back together when it should be balanced.

 

So that's my piece, I really feel for you bro, I really do.

[elveden]

Well I was gona reply with a detailed post but friscodj kinda took the words out of my mouth

[jchan]

Avoid her like the plague. By the time she realizes what she wants, she'll already be in the arms of someone else.

 

Are you sure you want to waste your time and effort for that?

 

When someone flakes out of a relationship, it's no use telling the person how much you love them and how much you care for them. It may only push them farther away as they would want more time and space to think things more clearly.

 

NC all the way! you don't need to deal with the emotional drama that's coming upon you.

[NiceGuysFinishLast]

I would reccomend you get some self help books and keep positive man! It worked for me. Once you realise all the blessings in your life, you wont feel half as bad as you do now, I promise. I would recommend End the Struggle and Dance with Life by Susan Jeffers (sounds cheesy I know, but it is proper good) or Embracing Uncertainty by the same author. It really does put things in perspective mate, and you will not only feel better about yourself, you will stand a much better chance of getting back with your girl, and if things dont work out, you will have the peace of mind to know that it will not destroy you. These books come highly recommended from me, and I've been there mate. Best of luck with however you choose to deal with it.