To move or not to move?

[lovecrazy]

Ok well this is still up in the air....High up in the air actually!

 

Back Story, my boyfriend works for a Tech company, who sell, and do support for resturant Point of Sale Systems. Well basically an opening came open in Charlotte NC, we live in Atlanta, GA. And I am all for moving, I feel I need a change as well, and with my job, the company is all over the world...

 

But they might close the Charlotte Office, then his superior asked him if he would move to Chicago. He said they were going to send him up there, in a few weeks. I told him that I didnt know if I wanted to move that far away.

 

Charlotte is only 4 hours from my mother, which is not that much of a drive. but Chicago is like 12 hours, or more.

 

I also am thinking of asking for a bigger commitment...which in all honesty wont be a good thing, because I know I wont get it. Win is not ready for marriage, or for an engagment. I am willing to move, and be near him. But that is changing alot of my life for him....am I being selfish? I honestly really dont want to move....its so cold in Chicago, and I want to stay in the South. I dont like the North...

 

Advice, comments? Please! and thanks

[ElektraHere]

Winchica,

 

You have been through alot in the last few months. Although a move may do some good I think in your heart of hearts you know what you need to do. If you know right now that Chicago is not the place for you and that your b/f isnt ready for any commitments I would perhaps stay behind.

Its like an eskimo moving to Hawaii. Yes they may want to try it out for a moment but ultimately they would not be happy for a long term stay. Although on the other hand you could go up there and find an opportunity that you can't find in the south?

You need to follow what your gut is telling you. We tend to ignore that and then we kick ourselves for not listening to it.

[RayKay]

Hey Chica!

 

Hope you are doing well, I think of you often!

 

I agree with Elektra, you HAVE been through a lot the last while. I can understand your need to be near family very well, it would be hard to move very far away. You never know, you might love it! The North is not that bad - it has lots to offer too.....and I am MUCH more North than Chicago! but I certainly can understand your hesitancy without having a formal commitment as well.

 

Maybe rather than getting engaged/married now, you should discuss some plans for the future, like for instance does Win express he DOES plan on marrying you within a couple years for example?

 

What about him moving there, and then you going to visit a few times before you decide to move up or not?

[lovecrazy]

Hey Chica!

 

Hope you are doing well, I think of you often!

 

I agree with Elektra, you HAVE been through a lot the last while. I can understand your need to be near family very well, it would be hard to move very far away. You never know, you might love it! The North is not that bad - it has lots to offer too.....and I am MUCH more North than Chicago! but I certainly can understand your hesitancy without having a formal commitment as well.

 

Maybe rather than getting engaged/married now, you should discuss some plans for the future, like for instance does Win express he DOES plan on marrying you within a couple years for example?

 

What about him moving there, and then you going to visit a few times before you decide to move up or not?

 

We have talked about it, and he has expressed in a few years, he would be ready to marry me...

 

And I agree with what everyone is saying....