billuser Posted May 25, 2006 Share Posted May 25, 2006 Hello. I know that this is not the correct topic, but I don't know where else to put it. introduction : So, here it goes, I am 27, fat, ugly, never had a gf, one more thing, I am not ubly because I am fat, I have a truly ugly face, I think that even if I get rid of some weight, then I will be even uglier. I am insecure and in general, I have many other phsycological problems. I know it is pathetic, but hey, that is life (PLEASE don't start with some advices that anyone can give like "lose some weight" or "have confidence" or anything like that). So, now, to the point. I got a new job 3 months ago. There is one man, he is responsible for our training (the new employers) in the company and he is a great person (I am not gay), I just like him, but when we are talking I see that he is looking at my face (his pupils are all over my face )and his eyes pupils are very very small. He is not gay too, I can surely tell that, but why a man is looking at me that way? I know that women unconsiosly judge men from their looks, for example, if a man is handsome, a woman will be friendlier to him (of course, this goes beyond only looks, but looks is the first stage), but I had no idea that some men also do that. I would hate to know that my trainer feels sorry about me or thinks that "hey, he is really ugly". What should I do? I know there are not many things I can do, but how can I change his mind about me? Thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dako Posted May 25, 2006 Share Posted May 25, 2006 Maybe he looks at everyone that way. How truly ugly are you on a scale of 1 to 10? I have a friend who's a solid 8 and he's very successful with work and cute women. After a while, I seldom think about his looks because of his personality and confidence. I know that sounds trite, but he's really an eyesore! Of couse I don't really believe you're ugly, but I'll take your word for it. I've spent most of my life feeling I was hideous. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LostInMyThoughts Posted May 25, 2006 Share Posted May 25, 2006 Well, how do you know he thinks you're ugly? Yes men judge other men, we do it. I have a friend who's a solid 8 and he's very successful with work and cute women. After a while, I seldom think about his looks because of his personality and confidence. I know that sounds trite, but he's really an eyesore! Dako, if your friend is an 8, how is he an eye-sore? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dako Posted May 25, 2006 Share Posted May 25, 2006 An 8 on the ugly scale. He could be a character actor in horror films. The official newly-minted Dako Ugly scale, Keith Richards would be a 1 John Merrick, the Elephant Man, would be a perfect 10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LostInMyThoughts Posted May 25, 2006 Share Posted May 25, 2006 An 8 on the ugly scale. He could be a character actor in horror films. LOL! I thought you meant the good looks scale. I was like, damn, I'm an 8-9, and if 8 is an eye-sore, well I better just invest in a life-time of vaseline. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
coollady1957 Posted May 25, 2006 Share Posted May 25, 2006 I think he meant on the ugly scale that his friend is an 8 which means is close to darn ugly. LOL I am gonna have to start typing faster. By the time I type my replies and send it , there are about three or four that pop up before I get it done. I think I have to much distraction around me to be timely with my replies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CarnelianButterfly Posted May 25, 2006 Share Posted May 25, 2006 An 8 on the ugly scale. He could be a character actor in horror films. The official newly-minted Dako Ugly scale, Keith Richards would be a 1 John Merrick, the Elephant Man, would be a perfect 10 Keith Richards is just ugly, John Merrick had a debilitating disease that I don't think should have him on the scale. Had he been born in the last 20 years, his deformations could have been corrected or alleviated. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
billuser Posted May 25, 2006 Author Share Posted May 25, 2006 OK, I am very ugly but this is not to discuss now, my personality and confidence sucks, so, bad looks + not mental charismas + luck of confidence = * * * *, BUT, I never had such problems with my frineds, or with others, I know he thinks that way because he has very small eye pupils, when his eyes are upon some girls we have at work, his pupils are getting bigger (like mine I guess). But I don't want to be judged from men that way. I think he is feeling sorry for me and that way, I also feel sorry for mysel, you know, a looser in girls allmost everywhere is equal to looser in total. * * * *! I don't want more phsycological problems right now.. I had enough so far... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
billuser Posted May 25, 2006 Author Share Posted May 25, 2006 LOL. OK, I just read what I wrote, I think that the last sentence does not make sense (sorry for my bad english), I meant that if one is a looser in girls, you know, never had a gf, stil a virgin etc... then, this person is considered from everyone to be a looser in every other aspect of life. That's is Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dako Posted May 25, 2006 Share Posted May 25, 2006 Keith Richards is just ugly, John Merrick had a debilitating disease that I don't think should have him on the scale. Had he been born in the last 20 years, his deformations could have been corrected or alleviated. I was groping for a familiar reference there. Any suggestions for a 10? I suppose this guy has some reaction to you, but it might be for some other reason. Sometimes the chemistry between people is a bigger factor than appearance. I always thought calling another guy ugly was a friendly way to communicate. At least my friends tell me that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CarnelianButterfly Posted May 25, 2006 Share Posted May 25, 2006 I was groping for a familiar reference there. Any suggestions for a 10? An orc from the Lord of the Rings? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dako Posted May 25, 2006 Share Posted May 25, 2006 Fair enough, but I had to look up that reference. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LostInMyThoughts Posted May 25, 2006 Share Posted May 25, 2006 LOL. OK, I just read what I wrote, I think that the last sentence does not make sense (sorry for my bad english), I meant that if one is a looser in girls, you know, never had a gf, stil a virgin etc... then, this person is considered from everyone to be a looser in every other aspect of life. That's is I don' think thats true. And guys pupils get wider when the look at women they're attracted to, its subconsious. Just because it doesnt happen when he looks at you, doesn't mean anything. It's like, when I see a naked women, I might pop a woodrow-wilson. When I see a naked man (I see naked men all the time, just before you ask RayKay... ), I don't get aroused. Does that mean I think the naked man is ugly or w/e? No, its just a physiological response to sexual attraction. And even if he didn't find you attractive? So what. That's not going to affect your job performance is it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dako Posted May 25, 2006 Share Posted May 25, 2006 Lost, Good points! I had a guy looking at me too closely just last week. I didn't stick around to measure his pupils, though! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
puppylove Posted May 27, 2006 Share Posted May 27, 2006 I'm not a very chatty person often I notice myself staring at peoples faces,as I'm always fascinated with shapes of eyes and every feature of a persons face, maybe its because I used to draw people. I'm sure that guy will stop staring, perhaps you remind him of someone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daddy Bear Posted May 27, 2006 Share Posted May 27, 2006 The official newly-minted Dako Ugly scale, Keith Richards would be a 1 John Merrick, the Elephant Man, would be a perfect 10 first Tourette's, and now he goes after the Elephant People. tusk, tusk, tusk. and at the same time he compliments Keith Richards' looks by placing him below Merrick on the scale. Dako has sunk to a new low. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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