Hate my family. (rant)

[Empathy]

I....HATE....my family! My dad in particular. I'm getting sick and tired of hearing how everything is my fault. How I'm tearing the family apart and how I'm responsible for my father's psychological damage. He said that all of the problems in his life were a result of me! When in truth it's my father that is the problem! He is the most inflammatory, self-centered, egotistical, SOB and liar I've ever encountered in my god forsaken life! He's been physically abusive in the past and still threatens to be abusive all the time. He's verbally abusive. Always has been and always will be. And thinks that just because it's HIS house I'm living in that he can invade my privacy! I just got something in the mail. I was opening it and he says, "What ya got there? If it's coming into MY house and as long as I'M writing all the checks around here I'm going to know everything that comes in the mail!" He starts into me before I even have a chance to answer! My jaw drops. The last time I checked just because I'm living in my parent's house doesn't give them the right to invade my privacy. It wasn't anything secretive but that's not the point. So I calmly ask him not start anything with me (because he's ALWAYS provoking me) and I walk away. As I'm walking away I hear him saying, "This is MY house. I'M paying for everything and as long as I'M paying for everything I'LL start whatever I want to!"

 

I'm getting sick and tired of "I'm God in this house and you'll do whatever I say!" I'm getting sick and tired of him being abusive to me, provoking me. Everytime he starts stuff with me and I try to defend myself (not even raising my voice. I could be pleading with him, tears in my eyes and everything.) he says, "See? This is what I'm talking about! You just won't shut up! That's it! I'm leaving." Then as a result my mother says, "I'm not going to lose my husband because of you! You're out of here!" Then my sister gangs up on me and starts saying that everything is my fault and she threatens me and tells me I just need to get out! And I have NOWHERE to go. I tried to get away a couple of weeks ago but they had no room for me at the YWCA, I got sick and had to come home. They gang up on me several times a month and I just don't know how much longer I can handle the burden of blame! It's the same thing over and OVER again!

 

I'm just sick and TIRED of being the GD scapegoat around here! I'm tired of everyone beating me up constantly and telling me that it's MY fault the family is deteriorating when it's NOT. I'm sick and tired of all this BLAME! I HATE MY FAMILY!

[CarnelianButterfly]

My dad opens my mail on occasion and especially my bank statements.

I live at an apartment near my school most of the time, but I go home to visit my Mom. I don't even like being in the same room as my father, he does the same schtick "I pay the bills, its my houses, yadda yadda". I have an older brother who is obviously my dad's favorite, they're a couple of farting, belching jerks. He sits on his butt all day, comes home and sits on the couch, he gets crappy if he's asked to do anything beyond picking up the mail.

[justpaisley]

Where do you live? Why can't you move out? I lived on $6 an hour (slightly over minimum wage) for a while - sure, it wasn't fun, but I did what was necessary because there was no way I was going to live at home. Find a roommate, find a good job, and get out of there!

 

I'm so sorry you're going through this. I hope your situation looks up soon.

[robowarrior]

Dee dee dee dee dee MOVE OUT!

 

Most misery in life comes from other people, your dad is the source of your misery in your life, so you definitly want to escape from the house and live life the way you want too. Some people say that getting away from their parents is the 'best' decision they ever made in their lives. Fundamentally he is right, his house, gives him claim over whatever he wants. Many people think they can 'control' other people, but that's only the case if you 'let them' control you. You have free will, i say make the best of it.

[Empathy]

Ok. I'm going to post this for the 50 THOUSANDTH time. I HAVE NOWHERE TO GO. No car. No job. No money. No friends that I can live with. Which is why I had to resort to the YWCA in the first place. This is also another reason why I said that my post was a rant. Because I just KNEW that someone was going to come on here and tell me to move out as if I haven't thought of that before. I can't get out. All I can do is ***** about it until I can get my sister's car. As of now I'm screwed. Sorry...I'm just at my wit's end.

[LostInMyThoughts]

I hate your family too.

 

Wanna help me hate mine?

[Bethany]

Get a job.

[justpaisley]

I know that problems, while you're having them, seem hopeless. Yours is not. You don't have to live as a slave to your dad's mood swings just because you need your sister's car. What is keeping you from getting a job, saving a little money for a security deposit on an apartment, and moving out? Don't yell at everyone again, let's try to work this out.

[Tigris]

Please can you tell me what country you live in because I've never heard of the place mentioned on your avatar before?

 

Secondly, is it possible that the YWCA might have a place now? I don't know anything about that organisation, sorry.

[demons-princess]

all i can say is it sounds like it sux BIG TIME SUX!well im doin finw with my family but i can say do what i di i hide my letters in a notebook in my room under my dressor and te rest of my stuff as for what he says to you just ignore it while hes talking just think of something else and when hes done go for a walk to col down!

btw

my mother reads my email before i do and so ushually i dont get to read my OWN email becouse she deletes it! its annoying but i deal with it i just go into my recently deleted so i always get to read it anyways

[AwdreeHpburn]

Sorry - I hate my family too.

 

Is there any way you could get a job?

 

In the US, its a federal offense to open someone else's mail. If its addressed to you, your NOT a minor, its against the law, in the US anyway.

[Empathy]

Get a job.

The only problem is...I live 15 minutes driving distance from the city. No bus lines and it's too expensive to get a taxi. If I got a job I'd have no way of getting there.

[Empathy]

I know that problems, while you're having them, seem hopeless. Yours is not. You don't have to live as a slave to your dad's mood swings just because you need your sister's car. What is keeping you from getting a job, saving a little money for a security deposit on an apartment, and moving out? Don't yell at everyone again, let's try to work this out.

 

And I really wasn't yelling AT anyone. I was just yelling. I'm frustrated. I've held it in for so long that I'm this close to exploding. Not AT anyone. Just exploding in general. I'm sorry if it gets misconstrued that way.