How Others Perceive Us

[AntiLove_SuperStar]

Recently, I and four others in our college drama class worked together for several hours a week to put on a play which was assessed as a major part of our final year grade, so it was fairly intense and it got to the stage last week whereby we were all on a rehearsal break, sitting around and having one of those sleepver-style conversations (we are all girls), as you do. About sex/life experiences.

 

I didn't mind, I'm a fairly open person and see these people as trustworthy (well, trustworthy enough, you can never tell), and over the course of an hour I revealed I'd had a drug problem, far too many relationships than is appropriate for my age, that I'd dropped out of my first attempt at college, that I have a lot of sex, I'd had an eating disorder that put me in hospital, at least two psychiatrists, I'd gotten physical with a boyfriend's best friend just hours after he begged his parents to allow him to go out with me (he was a strict-ish Muslim), I'm fairly gay (currently have a boyfriend, would say I'm 60-70% attracted to girls though)...etc.

 

The others were pretty surprised. I always think..well..assume..that the type of person I am is written on my face, but it would appear I give out an unassuming/"nice" kind of persona!

 

It knocked me sideways a little bit. You really can never go on appearances, can you?

[ElektraHere]

Anti

 

Can I ask you a question? Have you ever had a relationship with a woman? I ask this because you mention that you are 60-70% attracted to them. Do you think that your unhappiness and other issues stem from not being able to be yourself? Meaning someone who is able to be in a relationship with a woman.

[AntiLove_SuperStar]

I certainly have had a few relationships with women...and had non-relationship fooling around as well.

 

I realised I was like this when I was 14, and am completely comfortable with it. I told my mom when I was 15! My boyfriend knows, and so do most of my friends. I barely even give it much thought.