keefy1972 Posted May 9, 2006 Share Posted May 9, 2006 derrrrrrrrr Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
freedom Posted May 9, 2006 Share Posted May 9, 2006 good luck.. You've made a decision, the only way is up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PersonalGrowth Posted May 9, 2006 Share Posted May 9, 2006 Don't be so hard on yourself. To begin with, NC is easier said than done. It is especially difficult in your situation where you have to see her at work. You went for it - you lived, you loved. You deserve to have someone who mirrors back your feelings and excitement. Take what you can from this - some little lesson or tidbit. In time, probably lots of it, she will fade into the distance and you will wonder what you ever saw in her. In the grand scheme of life she will be but a blip on the screen or your motion-picture in the making. Congrats on Day 1. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keefy1972 Posted May 9, 2006 Author Share Posted May 9, 2006 Thanks PG. Nice way of putting it. I know all of this, its just as you said, much easier said than done. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Bugg Posted May 9, 2006 Share Posted May 9, 2006 Keefy, I'm proud of ya...and so is Ringo..... Seriously, you are in a TOUGH spot. MOST people break up with their ex'es and never have to see them again. You have to see your ex if not everyday, on an intermittent basis, and some of those times she keeps you "hanging"...by asking you to hang out with her, flirting with you, etc. Who WOULDN'T have a tough time with that, if they still had feelings for that person? I agree with the previous poster. You did what you could..and in the grand scheme of life she is a blip. NC is MUCH easier said than done...but doable nonetheless. You just have to make that commitment to yourself and stick with it. It's mind over matter... Congrats on Day 1......Be strong Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bacci Posted May 9, 2006 Share Posted May 9, 2006 Keefy, You did right and though telling her she's not that great might sound bitter to others, its just the truth and she knows it, and you're not bad at all. You've done the right thing. She was giving you just enough hope to keep you hanging there, keeping her options open. Let's see what she does now, initially she won't buy it, she'll see how long will you be able to keep that NC , SHOW HER. Later, it won't matter so much. I'm doing the same thing, following your advise and drawing from your experience. We are all together on this and if you can do it so can I. You are an inspiration to me, I want to see you come out of this being all that you can be. Its her turn to experience rejection, even if you are still hoping somewhere deep inside for a reconciliation, achieving it lies not in seeking it, but perversely, in turning away. Being self possesed again you'll interact out of strength, not weakness. To arrive at this point you must settle an account of the break up that legitimates it, (she is not that great) concluding that it didn't meet your needs. Reconciliation is a matter of redefining self, other , relationship and, it turns out, timing as well. Move on, she may want back or not, who knows, next time it might be you who is not willing to return to what was nor create something new with her. For now, let her realise what has been lost, let her sink to where you have arduously climbed out, stop giving her this ego boost, take care of yourself. Keep posting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keefy1972 Posted May 9, 2006 Author Share Posted May 9, 2006 derrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brando Posted May 9, 2006 Share Posted May 9, 2006 Well im glad to see you learned to focus on you now. It will be difficult at first, from what i have read of your posts, but in time it gets much easier. No need to point a finger, whats done is done, and you learned so far what you needed to learn. Hang in there, and remember to take care of you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keefy1972 Posted May 9, 2006 Author Share Posted May 9, 2006 derrrrrrrrrrrrr Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bacci Posted May 9, 2006 Share Posted May 9, 2006 Sounds like you have really moved on emotionally. I am sure you will implement the necessary changes to heal completely and in the meantime somehow manage to help others do the same. Good luck and stay strong. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keefy1972 Posted May 10, 2006 Author Share Posted May 10, 2006 derrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Bugg Posted May 10, 2006 Share Posted May 10, 2006 Definetely her trying to get you to bite Keefy....don't DO it!!!! Step away from the phone and nobody gets hurt! This is only day 2...expect to have some weak moments, but don't let them be on HER terms. Stay strong Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenny_mcs Posted May 10, 2006 Share Posted May 10, 2006 Keefy- I have just read some of your previous threads, and I'm posting to support you in your NC. Your ex strikes me as incredibly selfish. She obviously *loves* the fact that you have not been able to get over her. A few days after you sent the e-mail requesting that you 2 break all ties she calls you? Lame. Stay strong in NC and don't give her this power over you anymore. I am rooting for you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Bugg Posted May 10, 2006 Share Posted May 10, 2006 In 100% agreement with Jenny, Keefy..... I'm rooting for you too!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keefy1972 Posted May 11, 2006 Author Share Posted May 11, 2006 It was a good day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Bugg Posted May 11, 2006 Share Posted May 11, 2006 YAYYYYY Keefy....Good for you!! I am sure she was boring holes in your back with her dagger eyes..LOL Oh well.....too bad ,so sad!! Keep it up!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keefy1972 Posted May 12, 2006 Author Share Posted May 12, 2006 derrrrrrrrrrr Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Bugg Posted May 12, 2006 Share Posted May 12, 2006 Keefy, your moods will fluctuate. It's normal...but remember: It's these back and forth feelings that have kept you stuck for so long! At least now you can start moving forward. You will second guess yourself, but please DON'T. Just remember that you contacting her is ONLY satisfying HER ego.... Congrats on day 4!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keefy1972 Posted May 12, 2006 Author Share Posted May 12, 2006 Thanks Lady Bugg. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brando Posted May 12, 2006 Share Posted May 12, 2006 way to go keefy. Making your female co worker laugh during your conversation with her was priceless. Glad to hear your doing well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keefy1972 Posted May 14, 2006 Author Share Posted May 14, 2006 Thanks Brando. Day 5 is complete and I'm doing great. Working out, feeling good, feeling strong. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keefy1972 Posted May 14, 2006 Author Share Posted May 14, 2006 Day 6 is in the books and I feel good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keefy1972 Posted May 15, 2006 Author Share Posted May 15, 2006 It's one week today! I feel good about it so far but everyday is different. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Bugg Posted May 15, 2006 Share Posted May 15, 2006 Good job Keefy!!!! You are 100% right about the advice thing. Even if it is helping ONE person, then it certainly DOES make it worthwhile!!! Keep going strong....if you feel weak, come and post here. We are all here to encourage, and "listen" to you, if need be... You're doing great!! Be proud of yourself! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Confusion1974 Posted May 15, 2006 Share Posted May 15, 2006 Whauw Keefy! Well done!! And thanks again for your support! Hope one day I will be able to let go as well Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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