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My Mother loves me just the way I am...


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Today I opened up to my mother about my sexuality. It was a long process but it was the most gratifying experience in my life.

 

The conversation started off about religion, and I told her that I was losing faith in our religion. Then she asked me why. I told her that it was alot of personal things that I am so afraid of sharing...

 

Then out of the blue she asks, "You're not gay are?"

 

Then I just said, "Yeah, I am..." Then I started sobbing, because now there was no turning back. I had been thinking the worst case scenario...

 

But then I felt her arms around me and she gave me the warmest hug that I've ever had. I told her that I was sorry and that I tried to change my whole life. I was scared that she would stop loving me and et al...

 

Then she said, "That was not going to happen. My love is completely unconditional...I'm so hurt that you thought otherwise..."

 

Then we had a long conversation about everything...I told her about my suicide attempt when I was 17 and how I've been so bitter with a chip on my shoulder.

She said that she had no idea that I was gay. She has this stereotype of all gay men being effiminate and that I am just a regular boy.

She said the only thing that would concern her is that she is worried about other people's ignorance.

 

We just talked and talked about everything. All of these wounds that I've had from the past I was finally able to talk about them.

I've felt like I've had this wall around me my whole life and now, for the first time, I am finally being the real me...

I had been having doubts about my religion but not about faith. When I felt my mom's love I know that there is a god...and that I am not a mistake.

 

When I first joined enotalone.com I was so scared and emotionally damaged. I didn't want to be who I was. But after talking to all the great people here all of you gave me strength and courage. I felt like such a coward and now I realize I had nothing to be afraid of.

 

Thank you everyone here who accepted me and told me everything would be okay. Thank you all for taking the time out to answer my inquiries. And more importantly thank you for being friends. Even though I've never seen your faces I see you all as friends...Because you took the time to help me grow. Had I not known there were other people out there going through the samethings I never would have had the strength.

 

Thank you all so much.

 

My mom accepts me just the way I am.

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THAT'S GREAT FOXLOCKE!! I knew your mom would be so supportive of you! Now you must feel a great deal off of your chest! I know I did when I came out to my mom.. I'm so happy for you right now, it made my day to here that.

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FoxLocke,

 

I'm SO happy for you!!!! You have a wonderful, wonderful mother and I'm glad that things turned out well and she accepts you for who you are! You should be so proud of her and proud of yourself as well for having the strength and courage to be who you are and to share all of yourself with your mother!

 

[Does a happy, coming out dance in FoxLocke's honor]

 

 

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Thanks everyone...

 

We have both been talking about everything alot. This has been the first time I could be completely open about everything...Today I skipped my first class because we just talked and talked and talked.

 

We are both going to goto family counseling, at her request. We have so many issues to talk about and for the first time we are going to. This has been a good thing for me because now there are no more secrets between us.

 

Thanks everyone for supporting me. I couldn't have done it without all your support

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Fox,

 

Wow I just saw this thread now, and I have to say I am absolutely thrilled, I felt a great sense of relief and happiness for you when I read your post, as I have been following your posts here for a while. I always knew in my heart things would actually be okay for you, once you were ready to come out to your loved ones, and I am so happy that did come true.

 

Your mother's reaction was much like the one my mum had when my brother came out - and it brought them tremendously closer (she and my brother and his partner talk nearly everyday even though my brother lives in another province now wiht his boyfriend). Never underestimate the power of a mother's love for her children.

 

I am absolutely thrilled, and it's weird to be this excited for someone I never even met, but I am just because I have been following your posts for a good while, and you have come a long way in accepting yourself - and now it is wonderful to find your mother does too...

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FoxLocke,

 

I am happy to hear that your Mom loves you just the way you are.My Mom was like that as well,we were very close.

She only wanted to see my happiness whatever that proved to be.that is beautiful,I believe a parent's love should be unconditional but unfortunatally it not always is.FoxLocke we are a few of the lucky ones.

 

Take care.

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