Grieving my dog.

[FoxLocke]

Last weekend I had return my dog back to the animal shelter I adopted him from. Grant it, he did not die but it felt like a death...I am still in this very lethargic mood about it.

 

When I adopted him he was one month old. Now he is 12 months. He was a little Rat Terrier mix. Charlie(his name)was very rambunctious and was the epitome of love and acceptance. Whenever I had a bad day he was there to great me and play with me, and always managed to cheer me up.

He used to lick my: face, ears, and kiss me on the lips. He loved it when I scratched his belly, and he was the best fetch player...

 

Recently, Charlie became inconsolable and hard to take care of. I guess part of it was his breed and the other part of it had to deal with him mourning his own friend. The dog that lived next door to us, Kiki, died a month ago. Ever since then Charlie had gotten very depressed. There was nothing I could do to cheer him up...And he would howl and bark all night long. And when i would let him in the house he would tear up everything until he got to sleep with me...However, as a college student I couldn't handle it. I was getting no sleep and having more and more trouble keeping up with him.

I thought because he was a relatively small dog that he would be perfect for my lifestyle...And I tried every remedy(right down to a no bark collar), and nothing succeeded...

So finally I made the decision to put him up for adoption.

 

I tried to steel myself against the grief. I don't regret my choice, but it still hurts VERY bad.

When I signed him over to the shelter he started licking my face, and I just totally lost it. I walked out of the shelter very fast and started bawling my eyes out. I cried the rest of the way home and the rest of the weekend.

It felt like someone broke my heart with a sledge hammer. Now, I am just going through this whole process. I can't even bear to go in the back yard and look at his dog house. And everything I see reminds me of him...

 

This week has just been really sucky for me and it is only Tuesday. How do I deal with this grief. I never thought I had the capacity to fall head over heels in love with a little dog...Which is ultimately why I did what I did, because I wanted him to be happy.

 

I just really miss my best friend, and I hope he is somewhere happy.

[renaissancewoman101]

It is very easy to fall in love with a pet, even a small dog, and get attached to them. I have guinea pigs as pets. Most people see guinea pigs as small, throwaway pets, and yet I am attached to all four of my guinea pigs. When one gets sick, they go to the vet, etc. When I moved out here, I found out that I could not fly the guinea pigs out here so I decided to drive out here so that I could keep my pigs and bring them out here. I am very attached to them. Last year one of my pigs died after a long illness and rather expensive surgery. I ended up having the guinea pig cremated and I have her ashes in a jar that I buried at my best friend's house.

 

Maybe if you volunteer at an animal shelter once a week, it might help you get over your sadness. Not sure.

[FoxLocke]

Thanks for your reply about your Guinea Pigs. =0) It is uncanny how pets can become dear friends.

I'm thinking of getting rats as pets...Breeders say that they are as intelligent and loving as dogs. Plus, they would fit in more with my lifestyle.

I was actually considering volunteering at a shelter. But the nearest one is 25 miles away...Maybe if it is a once a week thing.

 

Anyway, I am sure I will get over this period of grief. I just needed to express my feelings about it. He was a wonderful pet and I will never forget him.

[Dako]

Sorry you had to give up your friend for adoption.

 

Since my divorce, I miss mine so much. That's her on the left. Someday I'll have another.

[renaissancewoman101]

Foxlocke, if you are planning to get a rat as a pet, get one from a rescue place. There are quite a few rescue groups for rats. Depending where you lived, I probably would know someone who runs a rat rescue, since a lot of them are also involved in guinea pig rescues.

[HaloDestroyer]

Hey Foxlocke...

 

I have an 8 year old Springer Spaniel, who is having a ton of trouble going to the toilet.

 

They think it might be a growth in his rectum, and he has been diagnosed with cancer as a result.

 

This dog has been my best friend for the past decade... I've known him longer than all my other friends. I named him. I play games with him. He's a good pal.

 

His little face lights up when I come home, and the feeling I get in my heart when I see that look is rivalled only by the look I get from my girlfriend when she sees me...

 

If he dies, I don't know what I'm going to do. I feel like you do already, and he's still here!! Someone has smashed my heart with a sledgehammer.

 

P.M. me if you want to talk.

 

Hope this helps...

[FoxLocke]

Rennasciancewoman, would you happen to have any links?

 

I have been reading alot about rats and I think they would be perfect for me.

[renaissancewoman101]

FoxLocke, if you are not comfortable telling on here where you live (city), PM me and I can let you know what rat rescues I know in that area or close by.

[CarnelianButterfly]

My dog was a rescue, she had a lot of health problems when I got her. A mix of German shep and Collie, long hair and a long pointed nose, cutest thing in the world. She was severely underweight, had heart worms, and a bad allergies. She was an older dog, so helping her was difficult, heart worm meds could easily have killed her (the vet never treated, afraid it would be too much) and she could never keep a good weight. I got to have 2 years with her before she died, its been about 2 since she's been gone, I still miss going home to her dancing and prancing around fluffy tail going in circles. She was the funniest dog and a real sweetheart, she'll always be in my heart even if she was just a dog.

[keenan]

Hey, FoxLocke. Am so sorry to hear about Charlie. Thanks for sharing your puppy love with us.

 

I'm crazy about my feisty orange tabby cat, and will be so sad to lose him someday. He's 11 years old now and sleeps tons and is losing his bright color, but he still runs around the house like a fiend, plays fetch with ink pens, and waits for me in the window when when I leave. He's like a dog.

 

Don't worry--Charlie will find a new home where he's happy.

[HaloDestroyer]

I got a baby snake a few months ago.

 

It's already starting to develop character, but it just reminds me of how much emotion dogs can actually express.

[renaissancewoman101]

HaloDestroyer, what kind of a snake do you have? Snakes and lizards and stuff like that scare me.

[HaloDestroyer]

It's a Ghost Corn snake. A beautiful little thing. Already bit me, little bugger!!

[red10]

Foxlocke - sooo sorry to hear about losing Charlie! Pets become family, and it's so hard to part with them!

 

I however would not recommend getting a rat - ONLY because their lifespan is usually not very long - maybe 1 yr. - I only know this cause my roommate loves animals and when she moved in she had 5 rats - they were really cute, but now she has 0. i've lived with her for about 1 1/2 yrs. the last one passed away over the summer....just some input

[NJRon]

Rats do have short life spans.. but for some reason, I don;t seem to get as attached to them as I do a dog. I realize that their lifespan is short... so it just seems part of the natural cycle of things. I like rats over other rodents because they are intelligent, you can actually train them.

 

I just got back from kentucky, where I gave my dog to my grandmother for safe keeping. I had him for 3 years but just am unable to give him the life he deserves right now. It was pretty pathetic really... I don't know how much ove rthe past couple of weeks I just laid there with him and petted him. I would break down every now and then. Leaving him there was rough, but was the best thing for him and I am confident he will get a lot more attention.

[renaissancewoman101]

Rats and guinea pigs are nice pets but they do have shorter life spans than a dog. My guinea pigs usually live about 3-5 years and I take VERY good care of them. My best friend's mom has been trying to convince me to get a dog eventually since they live a lot longer and they are more responsive to love and affection than are guinea pigs. Problem is I live in an apartment plus I am deathly afraid of dogs. I was attacked by a dog when I was little and the dog bit me and I needed stitches for that.

[NJRon]

Hmm... I would avoid that then If you want it, parrots actually live a very long time and bond very strongly with people. But, I hate birds personally.

[FoxLocke]

I am also considering having a cat as well.

 

I think I may be better suited for pets that do not need such an active lifestyle.

 

I had to do alot with Charlie because he was a Terrier and they have tons of energy to spare...And sadly that started conflicting with other things that I needed to do...=0(...

 

Anyway, I know about the short lifespan of rats(2 to 3 years, max), but I just love animals that are intelligent enough to give and receive affection. So, perhaps, until I finish school, having rats can be like substitute dogs.

 

However, there will never be another Charlie. He was one special little pooch and I will always love him. =0(

[orgasmictofu]

As a person who has worked with animal rescues for a good chunk of my life (and am planning to dedicate my life to the cause), I would highly suggest you not get a pet at this point in your life. Being a student in college is tough. It's financially draining and very time consuming. I know, I'm there. If you found you couldn't give the time or the energy for one pet, you likely won't have the time or energy for another.

 

I've had many rats in my life. They live much longer than 1 year. My last two rats lived over 3 years a piece and were healthy and happy their whole lives. They are a lot of work. They need DAILY attention. Please do not pass them up as maintenance-free or low-maintenance pets. My rats lived well because I devoted a lot of time into proper nutrition and housing. They lived on human grade food from the bulk food store and fresh fruits and veggies and lived in a massive ferret cage.

 

Same goes for cats. I've had cats in my life that required more than a bowl of food a day and a clean litter box. What if your cat develops diabetes and needs daily insulin and 2 feedings a day at a regular time? Will you say that it's too much work and rehome it?

 

I just hate seeing people finding their pets an inconvenience and then trying to rehome them. It saddens me. I've seen so many otherwise healthy animals go through shelter shock and develop serious health problems.

 

I'm not judging. I am just providing my opinion from years of experience in the field.

 

And on the bright side, if you don't get another pet until you are more stable in your life, you won't have to go through the same heartache again.

[renaissancewoman101]

Orgasmictofu, what kind of animal rescue are you into? dog, cat? If I ever have a house and some money, I want to run a guinea pig rescue. When I was living in Milwaukee, WI, I helped out at a guinea pig rescue two hours away from me. Of the four guinea pigs that I have, three are from rescues.

[orgasmictofu]

Orgasmictofu, what kind of animal rescue are you into? dog, cat? If I ever have a house and some money, I want to run a guinea pig rescue. When I was living in Milwaukee, WI, I helped out at a guinea pig rescue two hours away from me. Of the four guinea pigs that I have, three are from rescues.

 

Sent you a pm so I don't hijack the thread (it's a bad habit of mine)

[FoxLocke]

Don't get me wrong. I am not in the habit of rehoming and rehousing pets just because..

 

1.) My dog was the first pet that I have EVER owned...I knew full well the responsibility it was going to take. I made sure I could cover the vet bills, food, shelter, and all the other essentials...Unfortunately, it did not work out as I had hoped. My mistake was not finding the right breed of dog for my lifestyle...

 

2.) I took him back to the shelter as an absolute last resort. Believe me, I exercised every single option. The only way I could cure him was to purchase another dog and my budget did not allow for that.

 

I appreciate and admire your concern for animals, but don't judge me like that. I don't go out and buy pets just so that I can say I have pets. I really love the companionship they offer, but it got to the place where I had to decide. And I decided that I would not get another dog until after I finished with school.

[orgasmictofu]

I did say right in my post I am not judging you as a person. I'm sure the decision to give up your dog was a difficult one for you to do.

 

I was merely giving you my opinion based on what you're telling us. And my opinion comes from experience.

 

I'm sure you loved your dog. I'm sure you will love any pet you ever have.

 

But please think about what's best for the animal as well.

 

EDIT: I wasn't going to add anything else. But I would really like to give the OP some food for thought.

 

And this has nothing to do with who who are as a person. Just judging by your actions with the dog, and your response to me. Your response was quite defensive. I was just giving a suggestion, and you thought I was accusing you of not knowing what you're doing and being cruel and negligent. That's not what I think. I think you only have good intentions. That being said, and again this comes from experience, I think despite your good intentions, you are only willing to keep an animal as long as you are not being inconvenienced. And this is proven (at least in one case) by what you did with Charlie. You loved him, he was there for you, you provided him with food and shelter and medical care. But he was too much for you to handle, he disrupted your life, and you surrendered him at a shelter. PLEASE correct me if I'm wrong.

 

So what I would like for you to think about before you get another pet, is at what point would you have to rehome them? What would be your breaking point? Too expensive? Too stinky? Too noisy? Too complicated medical problem? Peeing outside the box? Boyfriend allergies? Having a kid? Moving? These are all very important questions to ask. EVERYONE should be asking these questions before getting a pet. Even if it's "just" a hamster. Those things can live upto 4 years with great care. So ask these questions with that life expectancy in mind.

 

Again, I am NOT attacking you. This is something I am very passionate about. It's my life. And I am just trying to help.