Should I give something for valentines day?

[odysseus77]

Rather recently me and my ex have began talking again after 1.5 years of no contact. We have talked on the phone on several occasions and went out once and had a very good time. This is the girl who I have always wanted to be with, and i still want to be with her, but I don't want her to feel as if I'm needy or moving to fast back towards a relationship...so the question is, do I send or say anything regarding valentines day? Obviously I want to send some card or flowers that say will you be my valentine? However, I dont know how she feels about us being "us" again, and in one conversation she said, "I always will leave the window open for us to be back together, because I have never loved anyone like you, but right now I am still very confused." So what do I do?

[daredevil]

Let things develop, don't show too much and take things as they occur, I don't think its the right time to show more feelings than she does, because it might scare her away... let her do the first step thingy of using words and feelings for you again...

[DN]

Send her something small, like a bunch of flowers, but with no message other than Happy Valentines Day. That will let her know how you feel but will not be too much pressure.

[Darketernal]

I wouldn't send her anything, as it always backfires at you. You are showing her that you are dependant on her, while it should be the other way around. It sounds strange but its better not sending her anything and showing her you have a independent functioning life of your own without her in your life.

[deejay74]

i am not going to send anything to my ex for v-day cuz v-day is for romance and couples. my ex and i are not a couple anymore, nor is there any romance between us.

 

my question is, what about a birthday? my ex's birthday is coming up at the end of feb. and i feel i should just send her a friendly card and that's it. is this a bad idea? i wouldn't be sending her any lovey-dovey type of birthday card, something funny and completely neutral.

 

she broke up with me 3 days before new years and by then, it would be close to 2 months since the split. personally, i don't see any harm in it but then again, some of you on here may have a better idea.

 

let me know.

[coooolsome]

You could buy a single pink carnation. As long as she isnt dating anyone. I did that with my ex before we got together but not b/c I liked her. She didnt have a valentine and I just did it.

[friscodj]

She's "very confused", as she states. If you start getting mixed up in that, you're in for quite a ride...one which I've taken many times before...and would not want to take again...

 

I say let her make the effort and the moves, which she will do if she would like to get back together I think. No gift, just a quick "Happy Valentine's Day" during a phone call, email, etc. You still want to be with this girl so a friendship is out of the question I think...

[NR498E]

If you and a ex are no longer together.Thus ex's, you never send them anything!

Whether it's a birthday,Christmas,or Fourth of July that is your ex.Not your friend, not nothing.And you for damn sure don't send them anything on Valentines Day.

 

Ex's are ex's not friends, and if your one of the lucky few that does manage to become true friends with an ex then maybe.But that is as rare as a me getting out of bed before noon.

[Scout]

You could always take the humorous approach and have a card made up that says "Happy Valentine's to My Favorite Ex!"

 

Lol. Actually, I have no idea. This holiday always leaves anyone in a vaguely-defined "relationship" scratching their head...