My ex broke NC

[astralholic]

Well, I won't give the whole backstory because sometimes I don't even believe it, but here's the gist. I broke up with her because I couldn't deal with her issues anymore. It started to wear me thin and one day I just called and said I was through with us. I'm starting to believe she may be a manic-depressive. Anyway, I've seen her two times after that. Once, we made a plan to hang out. She broke it off and said she didn't want us to end up in a fight. I thought to myself when I got the message, thank God because I regretted making plans with her. Anyway that was three weeks ago and I haven't spoke with her since. By the way, if anyone wants to know how the dumper sometimes feels, well....this has been harder for me than getting dumped because I love her so much. The only thing that separates us is that the fact that I'm a man, she's a woman, and her issues.

 

I had deleted her number's from my cell. I got a text tonight while hanging with my buddy. It said, do you still hate me? I thought it could be her, but wasn't sure. My buddy being well himself quickly texted back, I don't hate anyone signed (My nickname, which I'll keep private). Well, I got home and ran through all my numbers in my phone book. Yep, it was her. The question I have is, what should I do? Half of me says shoot her off an email and tell what's going on, that I didn't know it was her number, sorry for the absurd response, etc. Keep it light and that's it. The other half of me wants to say screw it and what's the point? See the thing I've realized is that people don't change. Sorry to burst people's bubble, but they don't. I talked to quite a few people and they all say the same thing. Move on they say and it's weird because all of them said, that was the one they loved the most. I think once you get to a certain age everyone has one of those under their belts.

 

Sorry this has been so long, but unless someone can show me something positive that can come out of contacting her I think I'll just let it go, wake up in the morning and try to forget. Which is something that is so hard to do.

[youngmom25]

well I think you should weigh your pros and con's on this one. Remember the reasons that you broke up with her and they obviously bothered you a lot for you to break up with her in the first place. If you respond in anyway to her you are giving her the ok for her to think you still care and there may be a chance for you two to get back together. If you don't respond even though you weren't the one that sent the text message she will think you don't want to talk.

 

So if you want to deal with all the things that bothered you in the first place again I would talk with her, if not let it all go and move on.

[Fisch]

Hi astralholic,

Man... im in the same exact boat as you. I broke it off with her because i just couldnt handle her "problems" anymore. I have my doubts all the time, its only been a month. I think i love her, but there was something missing. I wish we had an answer, that we just knew what decision would lead to the best outcome. But i just choose to give it time, explore other people and things and we will gain more insight on what we really had. You sound a lot more confident then me about what you did, just remember if u contact her things may get more painful for both of you, it takes a long time to heal from a deep relationship. On the other hand life is short and sometimes its not worth pushing the people we are close with away. Good luck man.