Its all so messed up

[abcd1234]

Hey everyone,

 

I guess ive been posting a lot recently about myself. I really just need to post right now to get all of these thoughts and feelings out before i try to make sense of them.

 

Well, ive just started 6th form college and im not sure yet if i like it. Ive been put in a tutor group with one person from my friendship group who im familiar with, but not like best friends with or anything. I was kind of hoping to be with some of my closer friends but im not really too bothered. What i am bothered about is that everyhting is different, i havent yet spoken to some of the people whom i have been friends with for years, i miss hanging out with them but because we are so busy i just havent got the time.

 

Ive got some new friends though! And i think they are all really cool. Ive been hanging around with them over the summer and got to know them. Im worried that the group will gradually grow apart but i know that we have somethign strong and special so even if we do get distant at times, i hope we can always be friends.

 

There is one girl whom i really like but im not too sure if she is interested in me in the same way or just wanting to be good friends, its driving me absolutely nuts! Shes got a little bit of a rocky history when it comes to relationships (been cheated on and messed about etc.) but we seem to get on soooo well. We have so many good times together, she has even said so herself! Im actually not sure whether i would want to persue a relationship with her or just remain friends becuase it is great at the moment!

 

I must say that i absolutely hate the fact that everything as changed, im not afraid of change and i dont dislike it, i think it is a very healthy thing. Its just that i am having trouble adjusting i guess. When i say 'change' i mean being split up from friends, having these mixed up feelings about this girl, meeting loads of new people all at once (it's very overwhelming).

 

One positive thing is that i am enjoying the subjects and courses that i have signed up for, i seem to have at least one friend in each and the proffessors are very enthusiastic about teaching us.

 

Sorry, if this is a little disorderly but i just needed to get these thoughts out. There is probably a load more thoughts that im starting to repress and im going to do my best to sort them out before they become bottled up inside. I didnt post them becuase i dont want this to drag on for you all. lol

 

Thanks, abc

[Tigris]

Ask the girl what she wants out of the relationship. Once you find out you can go on from there.

 

Good luck.

[DN]

Life is about change - it is sad sometimes but can also be exciting. You will be going to university, getting a new job, moving house and home, getting into (and maybe sometimes out of) new relationships.

 

A lot depends on how you go about regarding it - as something to fear - or as a challenge to be enjoyed and taken advantage of.

 

Carpe diem - seize the day. And make the most of it.

 

As you grow older, you'll find the only things you regret are the things you didn't do. ~Zachary Scott

[Alabama]

Change is inevitable. Yet we can eitiher accept it or let it overwhelm us. You're doing good, so keep it up. If you really like this girl, then ask her out. The worse she can say is no. Good luck!

[arwen]

Hey abcd,

 

I moved from being a student to the working life the last few months, all is new and in fact there is nothing to be sure of at this moment. The same circumstances give me very different moods, one day it feels like one Big Black Hole I fell into, another day it feels like all is possible in life and since I am committed to nothing (no relationship and no contract at work), I am free to go wherever I want to.

 

You see? It's all about the angle from which you look at it. As DN says, life wouldn't be life if it wasn't for the changes. Try to think positive and keep your goals in mind.

 

Ilse.

[abcd1234]

Thanks all, you really helped!

[abcd1234]

Ok, ive figured out that im actually starting to like 6th form college, i still feel a little anxious when i get on the bus in the morning but i seem to end up enjoying myself during the day and the feeling goes away.

 

Im starting to think that its just down to this girl, its weird, and i dont really know where to start. Our whole friendship group is very loving, we always hug and have a great time and everyone supports each other fully. This is fantastic but it also has a downside - it is hard to tell when someone is paying extra special attention to you and likes you more than just a friend.

 

Therein lies the problem, im finding it hard deciding whether or not the attention that she pays to me is just normal or if it is something special and meaningful. I mean, today when i saw her this morning she was a little quiet, but then at lunch break i saw her and she ran over and gave me a big hug we then walked to form and joked around for a while, right afterwards i felt absolutely fantastic, all my troubles and feelings of anxiousness were gone. We were supposed to go to the pub at the weekend but she canceled becuase she had to be up early for work the next day (her sister dragged her oput anyway but she said she had a bum time becuase she was just sat on her own, she even said she wished she had re-invited me), however she said that we could do something this weekend instead to make up for it. The point is, i cant tell whether she just sees me as a really good friend or something more, its so confusing!

 

I can't talk to her about it becuase it would only put our friendship on the line if she doesn't feel the same as me, she knows that i like 'somebody' but i cant tell if she knows that its her! If we do go out this weekend (i.e. she doesnt cancel again) then do you think i should talk to her about it, and what should i say??

 

Also, if she cancels this weekend, would that be a good sign that she isnt interested? I mean, she said that she wished i could have been there last weekend and she came up with the idea of going out this weekend (but im not sure if it was just to make me feel better).

 

Am i just over analysing everything?? Geez, why do this feelings drive people crazy? Its such a struggle, but i know that struggle is just natures way of strengthening things, but it still drives me crazy! lol