Time's flying by and I'm very agitated... (long read)

[Expression]

*Groans* just going through a bout of depression and wanted to get it out;

 

It's the graduating year at uni and I'm rapidly approaching the end.

 

I'm still trying to work out what I plan to do afterwards, but the other equally depressing thing is that I'm without a real set of friends within my course. I mean, know a few people here and there (only via group work for the most part), but everyone seems to know so many others and have so many connections. It's obvious to me that everyone entered their courses conveniently with friends whereas I chose mine alone, so my friends of the past are off in other courses. Hence I'm constantly left as a loner trying to maintain myself amongst a bunch of well-established social groups. I don't have that solid bunch of friends in my course that everyone else has.

 

The frustrating thing is that it's really difficult (at least for me) to try and integrate myself into a group of friends at this stage - when everyone's already been together for a while, with a history and a closeness that a newcomer like me would have no clue about. I honestly think I'd fit in (I have a sense of humor, have broad tastes, etc.) but how does a minor newbie dig his way into a bunch of spotlighted pros? I'm just a blip on their radar.

 

Metaphorically speaking, think of a public transport map; everyone would be city stations, with various routes crossing closely together, whereas I'd be a rural station, located far off with only a couple of routes into the city.

 

Yeah, it'd be easy to go talk to people. But it'd be short-term and I'd just be like an "incidental" person to them; meeting them, but only on the most superficial level. I wanna be able make enough of an impression that I'm deemed worthy of continual interaction, rather than just be "just a guy in this course".

 

So relating this to the forum; amongst the crowd is a lovely, lovely girl who I so admire, but of course, is happy with her set of friends. We're doing the same 3 units, but I've never spoken to her or interacted with her in any way. And yet she doesn't seem too out of reach, because her social group appears to be primarily 3-4 other girls. But they all have connections to others, which makes her indirectly linked with a larger group. Hence, there are plenty of other guys who probably have a better impression.

 

I also usually take the same path she takes going from and to the uni. Naturally, I don't know the specific times she's walking there, and when I see her, she's with her friends. I think I've passed her once when she was alone, but I hesistated and missed an opportunity. If I ever catch her alone again, I'm so telling myself to talk to her! Easier said than done of course. I'm not really looking into any "signals", because I'm not much of a star player what with my lack of a social group, but I'm pretty sure she has glanced at me on occasion when she didn't have to. (But hey, I could've just been in her line of sight).

 

Was hoping to be in her timeslot for this semester's practical work, but just the luck, I've been allocated elsewhere AND with mostly people from yet another course. (While she's been placed with her friends and their friends.) Put another way, I've been kicked out of the building I just entered again, while the building she's in is being reinforced...

 

*SIGH* I so don't wanna get to the end of the year as the lone wolf I am now.

 

 

 

Anyway, I welcome thoughts. Feel free to offer me any consolations

[CrystalDawn]

There is nothing wrong with being a lone wolf. But I also understand why you don't want to be. Just say hi to the ones you know alittle bit and just slowly work up from there. Just Hi or hello can do alot, and when you do talk to peers just be yourself. The same goes for the girl, just say hi to her at first and take your time. It's okay if she's with her friends when you say hi they will notice you too, that can be a good thing. Chances are several people like you already but just don't know how to approch you. In a way everyone's shy. Some just manage to get over it more than others.

[BeingMe]

Reading your situation took me to a simple conclusion, it's just a matter of time so my advice is to relax, take it easy and time will do the rest

[Alabama]

You've only just begun your school year, so I suggest as the above user, just relax and you'll make plenty of friends in time. All it take is time. Good luck!