if I learned how to do this, my life would be fruitful...

[sfboi415]

I keep telling myself that I need to expand my social outlets. And so I do that..but what usually happens is that I get along with one person and not the whole cohesive unit. It's not that I have an attitude problem and get on each others nerves..I think it is really because I don't share enough humorous things about myself, such as my opinions and observations about things, and mentioning the positive things that I'm doing. So, I get along with one person and we continue to talk after the social activity is done. For example, a girl from a play that I participated in still talk. However, one thing that I need to learn is how to set up the situation to where I can talk to her AND talk, connect, and get along with her friends. There are people I know who have way more friends than I do..they are an extended family. But there have been moments when I tried to connect with someone's "extended family" and they didn't vibe with me. Yes, they acted friendly towards me but no matter how many jokes I said or acted in a positive way, I was treated like I wasn't there. At a party with her guy friends, we talked about sports but the conversation wasn't going anywhere. I had to listen to the groupspeak going on with the friends, and put my two cents into it as well, which I enjoyed because it showed that I have an interest in what they're talking about. But that didn't work as well.

 

I know that there are guys who can easily make solid social connections quickly with their friend's friends . But how do they do it? Does anyone have any techniques on how to do this? To me it is more than just saying "hey, Matt how about me you and the rest of the group go to the theme park?"

[sfboi415]

no one's replied yet? how come?

[Alabama]

Try to become social, seems like the hardest thing in the world. I suggest if you have anything interesting to add or say, then when you get a chance to talk, do that. Or suggest if they want go to somewhere to hang out, then do that. Show that your interested when their speaking, to show that your listening. That way they know your not bored, if it interests you. There's not magic pill to becoming a social person, but all it takes is time. Good luck!