Wat do u find most attractive in a person

[Ursomeone]

hi ...

 

i dono if this has been asked before....uhhh any how i wanted to ask the ladies out there that wat do u find very attractive and sexy in a guy....hmm like u will love it...and wat about you ! guys ! wat do u say?

 

 

thanks

[shes2smart]

Keep up with me on verbal banter & make me laugh.

 

When I was single, a guy who could do both of those things could turn me into a pile of goo.

[miscom]

Funny - rather - quick witted!

Looks into your eyes during conversation.

Puts his hand on the back of your head or cups your lower jaw with both hands while you are kissing.

[kimichuck]

Keep up with me on verbal banter & make me laugh.

.

Couldn't agree more there isn't a bigger turn off than a bloke who you can't converse with and is constantly serious!

[DropToZero]

Keep up with me on verbal banter & make me laugh.

 

When I was single, a guy who could do both of those things could turn me into a pile of goo.

 

Funny - rather - quick witted!

 

Thank you two for both proving a point I've been trying to prove to every nice and shy guy on this site....just thanks.

[ShySoul]

Thank you two for both proving a point I've been trying to prove to every nice and shy guy on this site....just thanks.

 

Never denied verbal banter or quick wit wasn't important. The question is, what does banter and wit mean? They are pretty vague terms. Nice/shy guys have just as much wit as the next guy, they just show it in a different way. When they feel comfortable, they'll have better jokes and make you laugh more then you thought possible. And they can still be nice about it.

[shes2smart]

Thank you two for both proving a point I've been trying to prove to every nice and shy guy on this site....just thanks.

 

Never denied verbal banter or quick wit wasn't important. The question is, what does banter and wit mean? They are pretty vague terms. Nice/shy guys have just as much wit as the next guy, they just show it in a different way. When they feel comfortable, they'll have better jokes and make you laugh more then you thought possible. And they can still be nice about it.

 

Well, I think the point DropToZero was trying to get accross is that it's more about the guy's personality than physical appearance. There have been a number of posts on here from guys hung up on their physical appearance and (wrongly) assuming their perceived lack of physical attractiveness is what's been preventing them from having success with the ladies.

 

What is perceived as witty or funny is going to be subjective and is going to be different for each person. If you're interested in someone and you find they have a very different sense of humor from your own or -- God forbid -- NO sense of humor run for the hills! I don't care how hot s/he is...if you can't laugh together you're doomed.

 

I'd always been a smart-a**....then I got into radio and became a professional smart-a**. (hence the screen name...it had NOTHING to do with intellectual superiority but rather a smart mouth that's gotten me into trouble more than once) Anyway, nearly every radio person I've met has been a smart-mouthed, quick-witted, somewhat filthy-minded person. I thrive on this sort of mental stimulation. I particularly enjoy working with people who are even more quick with the wise cracks than I am -- they make me better.

 

So, being in this environment professionally and enjoying it, it had to spill over into my personal life. When I was single, a guy who I could trade wise cracks with...and who could even one-up me from time to time...was far more interesting than the rest. As I've mentioned in posts elsewhere, there's no one physical "type" I've been attracted to. If you lined up all my previous bf's, you'd see no common physical traits. (Although, if you lined them all up, they'd be much easier targets.....oops, there's that smart-a** thing again) What they all had in common was the ability to stimulate my brain through conversation.

[DropToZero]

The question is, what does banter and wit mean?

 

It means what she said...banter means to tease, and the quick-wit is when someone can come up w/ these comments fast so the conversation is always goin and she is always laughing. The idea of being just a little bit over-confident and funny at the same time is so attractive to women....even older women(no offense at ALL!)...as you can see Shy....it doesn't matter what age you are, women are not going to 'realize' all of a sudden and figure out they need a 'nice' and 'shy' guy to take care of them.

 

 

 

Nice/shy guys have just as much wit as the next guy, they just show it in a different way

 

Not really...not until I figured out how to open up and got out of being nice could I really tease girls and flirt with them well to that point. I just can't seem to get it by most guys that ask questions on this site about how well this works and most of them are too afraid to try it....always afraid of getting slapped and being 'mean'....when in reality I haven't met a girl yet who hasn't met me half-way and is trading comments back w/ me and she's always laughing when I'm talking to her. So you can do what you want....be nice and nothing else, which is really not a way to literally 'stand out'...or tease and try something new, see if it works for you...I dont know how many times I have to say it for everyone to get it, being a bit 'feisty'(as I was called once)...or eluding....funny...little bit overconfident and quick witted is so attractive to women, it doesn't matter what you look like, drive, money ..etc, you can get ANY girl with it.

 

 

 

When they feel comfortable, they'll have better jokes and make you laugh more then you thought possible

 

Better jokes? I dont think so...I couldn't get a girl to laugh if my life had depended on it back when I was nice and only nice. Haha, I think I used to literally celebrate in my mind from time to time when I could occasionally get a girl to laugh at something I had said. NOW....this stuff just rolls off of my tongue...and its me still....and she's always laughing, nor do I care anymore if she's laughing(not celebrating). You can keep telling me its 'mean' ...it wont work in the end...it's cruel and not nice...whatever man, I dont really care when you have nothing in the end to back it up but an occasional girl laughin at you and saying you're nice and I'm dating someone else now, and have about 10x more girl friends(good friends) than I ever had by being nice...lets just put it this way, I had a cell phone in HS, but it hasn't really been put to use until not too long ago(college) w/ all the numbers from friends I have in it now.

 

So...all in all, like even these women have said, whenever you ask a woman what she wants in a guy...like 9 out of 10 will say "A guy who can make me laugh"....plz tell me if I'm wrong. It's soooo attractive to women it's not even funny(no pun intended)...that's always my input...do what you wish.

 

 

 

When I was single, a guy who I could trade wise cracks with...and who could even one-up me from time to time...was far more interesting than the rest

 

Yea...most girls can't keep up...I've only met a few, but most of them are just far more experienced daters than me or have b/fs...doesn't mean I dont have fun messing w/ them tho hehe.

 

Ahh I'm done...hit me w/ something else I can rebuttle on in order to make my points stronger...but I should probably say what I find in a girl attractive to better this post....if she can keep up, and she takes care of herself....she's attractive to me...trust me, I..like shes2smart don't have any preference b/c every girl I've found myself attracted to have all looked completely different.

[smallworld]

Drop, I can't speak for all nice guys, but I can speak for ShySoul. "Nice" means different things to different people, but I consider Shy a "nice" guy because he genuinely likes and respects women. He doesn't have to tease, because when he flirts he's very adept at letting a girl know he likes her without resorting to insults, teasing, or mockery.

 

I on the other hand am more like you Drop. I tease and insult people I like, because it's the way my family shares affection with each other. Online it can be tricky to do that, but in the real world if you saw me – 5 ft scrappy girl with wild hair – you'd see why others might find getting insults from me endearing. So believe me I get what you're saying. All I'm saying is there is no one right way to flirt. And Shy's never going to resort to teasing, because it's not in his personality to do so. Whatever works, use it. Different girls like different things anyway.

 

As for what I find attractive, I'd have to say intelligence, compassion, wit/banter/double entendres, chivalry, and a man who loves me for my mind.

[I_love_rain_hugs_and_you]

There are seven criteria that I looked for in a girlfriend:

 

1. Similarity in interests, values, ambitions, dreams, and personalities

 

2. SOmeone who deeply loves me

 

3. Somone who is caring

 

4. Someone who is happy and doesn't suffer from unreasonable mood swings

 

5. SOmeone romantic

 

6. Someone who is responsible and mature. Doesn't tell fart jokes.

 

7. SOmeone who is humble but confident:

 

As for physical appearance, long hair, browner skin, a great smile is hot

 

This is why i think that Jasmine Trias is the hottest girl in the world!!!!

[kskm]

When you first meet someone your judgement is based on their looks- with that said I find that a great smile and good skin tone sexy.

Once you get to know someone your judgement changes and you want more then just looks- then I look for things like someone that can carry a conversation, can humor me, has confidence ------ This is not to be confused with c*ckiness. Nothing will turn me off more then a guy that is jealous.

[DropToZero]

Drop, I can?t speak for all nice guys, but I can speak for ShySoul. ?Nice? means different things to different people, but I consider Shy a ?nice? guy because he genuinely likes and respects women. He doesn?t have to tease, because when he flirts he?s very adept at letting a girl know he likes her without resorting to insults, teasing, or mockery.

 

Yea Shy's a little bit different I ...think...but I'm not sooo sure. Shy answer me one question...if you saw a random girl in a mall or at a store that you seemed initially attracted to...would you go talk to her and ask for her number? B/c if you say no, then I dont see what separates you from the rest of the nice guys, b/c most of them are shy.

 

Anyways, I'm not LITERALLY insulting people/girls. I've become somewhat of a smarta#$ and I know it...but it's what works. I dont sit there and tell girls that they're ugly or that they're dumb...etc, you can fill in the rest. I tell girls ...(based on actions, like a comedian) that ..lets just take tonite for example, girl at work is carrying some boxes on a cart....she drops them on this step and they all fall off of the cart. I saw it and say "Wow...smooth...I told you not to use carts, you can't control them" and I'm smiling during all this and say it in a funny tone..more or less sarcastic. Then the next time she grabs a cart, I remind her of what she just did and say she should use one.....then I ended up getting hit with the cart hehe....but she was just playin around and so was I. Does no one seem to understand what I'm saying....I'm still a nice guy, I just use that teasing to flirt with her, and her and I are always goin back and forth at it, she tries to trip me all the time, so I do it back....any questions?

[Napoleon Bonaparte]

Kskm I have seen some girls that go out of their way to make guys jealous by going on about an ex or how hot some other guy around them is while rarely if ever complimenting you. I can understand why they would be jealous when the girl is indulging in that kinda behavior.

[kskm]

I wasn't responding to anything except what attracts you to someone. That's all...

 

If a girl is acting like that then I classify that as Games. I don't play them and I would leave her on the spot.

[ShySoul]

Well, like attracts like. If you want to be a smartmouth your going to get one, but don't be complaining when those smart mouths of yours go too far and either someone gets hurts or your whole relationship becomes nothing but teasing.

 

Your cart example, heres how I'd handle it. I'd say "Yeah, those things are tricky. Just last week I must have done that about a dozen times.Think they have it out for us." It'll get a smile and make her laugh. It can also become a running joke for the two of you, an ongoing war of man vs machine. You'll never look at carts the same way again, and when she does she'll smile thinking of you. And you get all of that without ever putting her down for a second. And I came up with that in about 5 seconds after reading your example. Now thats quick wit.

 

I've used that humor with several girls, and they keep coming back for more. Got a few girls who will message me evertime they see me online, girls who talk to me at random. Hey, I spent over 10 hours talking to someone in the last couple of days, just the two of us and I lost track of the number of times we kept each other laughing. Had serious talks, funny talks, silly talks... everything. So I seem to be doing pretty darn good for myself.

 

So you can be funny and witty without teasing. And if you want some humor without being a smart aleck, Bill Cosby. Or if you need super fast wit, try watching the show Gilmore Girls. If you can keep up with them, your a master.

 

What separates me from the other shy/nice guys, is that I see shyness as a strength and not a weakness, and I have the courage to stand up for it. I've got it all, being shy and nice I more easily empathise with people and can provide the comfort factor to a greater degree then most. I can make her feel special as I'll remember to do things others may forget, the little things. But I also have the ability to stand up for myself and not be shy when the situation calls for it. Instead of seeing one way or another, I am the best of both worlds.

 

Also making me different, I don't tend to be attracted to complete strangers so the situation at the mall or store wouldn't happen to me. But I'm always up for hypotheticals. No I wouldn't go up to her and ask for her number. That's because the 300lb boyfriend standing next to her would be reason not to. Oh wait, was that another humorous, witty remark? Sorry about that. I'd talk to her. Number would depend, no use asking for a number if its clear that she wouldn't be someone I'd enjoy talking to, and I can judge character pretty good, pretty quickly.

[DropToZero]

Well, like attracts like. If you want to be a smartmouth your going to get one, but don't be complaining when those smart mouths of yours go too far and either someone gets hurts or your whole relationship becomes nothing but teasing.

 

If that's what you think...but not every girl is as good at it as I am...like I said it depends. Some girls can lay it on thick and be great to flirt with...others I can lay back a little and not be so flirty b/c they're just not as flirty or are somewhat shy...it just depends...and yes I can tell, I have NEVER hurt anyone w/ what I've said....and if the time came when I did, that'll be the day...if she did get pissed b/c of something I said, it'd be a personal problem, b/c she can't take a joke...and yes I'd tease her for that too. Actually....I remember once that DID happen....and I did tease her for not being able to take a joke and being too serious...SHE apologized for snapping back at me and I left w/ her number.

 

 

 

And I came up with that in about 5 seconds after reading your example. Now thats quick wit.

 

lol...5 seconds isn't fast enough.....I did it in about 1 b/c I knew it was her that dropped em from the second I heard it happen, and you're reading the example...in person is juuuuust a bit different.

 

 

I've used that humor with several girls, and they keep coming back for more. Got a few girls who will message me evertime they see me online, girls who talk to me at random. Hey, I spent over 10 hours talking to someone in the last couple of days, just the two of us and I lost track of the number of times we kept each other laughing. Had serious talks, funny talks, silly talks... everything. So I seem to be doing pretty darn good for myself.

 

I have a question...why do you keep using online examples...anyone can be ANYTHING they want online even if you know the person...personally. It's just easier....It's not true until you can do it in person...and I know that b/c when I was put to my first test w/ a girl I had pretty much 'met' online thru one of my friends....the first time I hung out with her I was afraid to try anything that I said to her online, but after a couple of hours and 2 movies, I opened up and let it on her the whole nite....and 5 other girls that came into her dorm. Her and I stayed up till about 4 am watchin movies and looking at stuff online while I teased her about stuff. As another example...in person*...she picked one of the movies, which as soon as we started watchin was horrible and everyone told her to change it b/c it sucked....I teased her the rest of the nite for not being able to make good choices...got hit on the shoulder a few times for that..and a hug when I left...my first real test was a success I'd have to say. Because in the beginning when I first came into her dorm, she and I were sitting really far apart and I was up against a wall not even facing her lol!

 

You would go talk to a girl that you found attractive? That's news to me...b/c from what I've read, I would never be able to tell you wold take that kind of action. Anyways....you can say you judge character quickly...but I hope you're not that quick...you may miss something.

[ShySoul]

...but not every girl is as good at it as I am...if she did get pissed b/c of something I said, it'd be a personal problem, b/c she can't take a joke...

 

Wow, all hail King DroptoZero(yes, I can be just as sarcastic and teasing as anyone). Clearly if something you said offended a girl, it was the girls problem, couldn't be you. Feel sorry for girls who encounter you. But, like my momma once told me, "boy, that smart mouth of yours is gonna get you in alot of trouble one day." Difference, my smart mouth referred to my use of intelligent comebacks to supid nonsensical remarks, your smart mouth refers to ego and the fact that you think girls couldn't possible be offended by you.

 

5 seconds isn't fast enough

 

Well, I counted the seconds it took me to read what you said and laugh about how you thought it was funny. You know, your right about that. People who use those jokes are funny, but not because of the jokes. They give nice guys and girls a good laugh at how foolish people can be. But I can come up with those things in a split second. I swear, I don't even think, they just come out. And they accomplish everything... nice, sweet, memorable, and always gets a laugh.

 

anyone can be ANYTHING they want online even if you know the person...personally

 

Nice to know your assuming people are different online. Try recognizing that people are who they are, regardless of where they are.

 

I teased her the rest of the nite for not being able to make good choices

 

Another one second change. How about, saying you thought the movie was good too, so its good to know someone has the same taste in movies, even if its bad ones. You'll still get her attention and a laugh and it will make you stand out while everyone else is ragging on her, your the lone one taking her side.

 

As far as hitting, ever thought that not every girl is going to show interest by hitting someone? The girls I like wouldn't do that anyway, so thats irrelevant.

 

I have a question...why do you keep using online examples...

 

There online and in person. I'm thinking of one girl in particular right now that I had several classes with last year, had lots of fun because I kept up the wit and never resorted to teasing. Or the girl who just asked me to hang out with her next week when she gets back from vacation, whom I also had clever and fun conversations with.

 

you would go talk to a girl that you found attractive? That's news to me...b/c from what I've read, I would never be able to tell you wold take that kind of action. Anyways....you can say you judge character quickly...but I hope you're not that quick...you may miss something.

 

I can get the general outline fairly quickly. I can get more out of 5 good minutes then most probably pick up in an hour. That's what shy people do after all, there good observers. Once they put the observation into practice, its a deadly combination. But I always leave room for all possiblites.

 

You understimate me. Which is precisly my strength. You never suspect the shy one, which is why when they spring into action they are can be so suspectful. They've got every bit the mystery, every bit the skills, every bit the "game" they just know how to play it better. You'd be surprised, and action is my middle name.

 

And now, I'm going to have me a jello pudding pop...

[OceanEyes]

Whoa, seems like this thread has been taken over by Drop and Shy debating over what's attractive and what isn't! I guess something that I should mention is that being laid-back and easy to talk to would be something that I'd definitely look for?

 

Seriously .. there are certain traits that will appeal to some women, and some that will appeal to others. There is no *concrete way* to seduce or entice women. You guys spend too much time arguing about what the best way is to be. Who cares? Go out and make it happen!

 

I'll have to agree with Shes2Smart about the sense of humour element - there are different types - and if you're not compatible this way, it's doomed from the start. Honestly! It really only takes this one seemingly small detail to turn someone off. For example, I would find something like an Adam Sandler comedy routine absolutely hysterical. If I couldn't share this with a guy, or if he found it "ridiculous", I'd head for the mountains. I'm a goofy, politically incorrect girl. If I knew right away that the guy I was dating wasn't on the same comedic wavelength as me, my immediate reaction would be bad vibes. If you can't laugh together at the same type of humour, then you know right away that you're incompatible.

 

About teasing: In my opinion, if you do it right, can be very effective. It creates sexual tension between a man and a woman - whether or not you want to admit it. When a man jokes around with a woman or teases her - whether it involves joking about her hairstyle or trying to trip her - it creates tension between them. You don't have to be "rude" or "fake", it's about being playful and having a sense of humour. I think teasing is probably one of the best ways to create tension and to really get to know someone better.

[whatdoyado]

Gosh it sounds like Shy and DropToZero need some time to cool it. lol

 

Shy's approach isn't going to bite him back, but DropToZero teasing may not always be the best tactict. If a guy teases then I'll do it back, or if he says it wrong then yeah, I'm not...thrilled. Now if a guy like Shy is understanding about "dropping the boxes" it might make me feel like more of an idiot, but it's still comforting because then hey, I'm not the only cluts.

 

DropToZero, I think Shy ment when he said "5 secs" like a girl saying they'll be ready in "one minute."

 

Honestly, DropToZero, your hot-headed and I'm sure you know it...plus it wouldn't kill you to be the one who is nice, would it? Shy's been taking your heat, stop grilling eachother. Have you guys thought that each approach might work, just not on every girl.

 

Anyways, to answer the post I would most likely be attracted to his personalty. Has to make me laugh. A nice smile is always a plus too!

[Napoleon Bonaparte]

Kskm I wouldn't tolerate a girl who did that. I was simply commenting.

[I_love_rain_hugs_and_you]

Anyway, does anyone else here think that Jasmine Trias is HOTTTTTT!!!!??

[DropToZero]

I dont have long, but I want to comment on a few things....but I feel I'm taking over this topic and changing its discussion tho ehhh

 

Another one second change. How about, saying you thought the movie was good too, so its good to know someone has the same taste in movies, even if its bad ones. You'll still get her attention and a laugh and it will make you stand out while everyone else is ragging on her, your the lone one taking her side.

 

No....SHE even knew it was bad and wanted to change it lol, and I was the only one really messing w/ her b/c of it. I love gettin that "I can't believe you said that" look....its soo much fun.

 

As far as hitting, ever thought that not every girl is going to show interest by hitting someone? The girls I like wouldn't do that anyway, so thats irrelevant.

 

Yes...actually if you would look around, most of the guys that tease and flirt like I do are getting hit on the shoulder....touched all the time. I didn't just get hit on the shoulder that nite, she put her hand on my thigh af few times while we were sitting next to one another.

 

Because again...I was like you, I used to watch my friends do the SAME exact things I do now back when I was in HS, and I'd always be the one telling them to stop playin around with her and leave her alone. I was the one the girl ran behind if the guy was chasing her w/ a hose....or if someone was tryin to get her w/ food or something b/c somewhat of a food fight had started hehe. I always thought it was stupid crap and it was just annoying the girl....yet for some reason...I never did date much in HS...wonder why that was? It didn't dawn on me until later that this type of attention and teasing is what attracts girls...its just how it is, doesn't mean I understand it...it just does. So then I look back at all my friends when they were flirting w/ girls and doing those things and think about how much I could have learned from them and how much more fun in HS I would have had if I could have loosened up and tried what they did when it came to girls.

 

 

 

But, like my momma once told me, "boy, that smart mouth of yours is gonna get you in alot of trouble one day."

 

Mom's dont know anything about dating...sorry...If I had kept listening to my mom I would still be trying to get my 1st date in my life. Sorry moms...and yes I had to literally say that to my mom, I told her not to give me any more dating advice till I was married, then she could help me all she wanted.

 

You're right Shy tho, I think I do give you less credit than you're worth...I will admit that, I underestimate some things about you.

 

 

Nice to know your assuming people are different online. Try recognizing that people are who they are, regardless of where they are.

 

That I'm not so sure about....people in chat rooms can be anyone they want...and online. Like even I had done....I wasn't really that good at flirting w/ this girl till I had done it in person....when I was talkin to her thru IM it was simple to think of those types of responses, and the real test didn't come until I met her. It's just the idea that people can open up more and NOT be themselves on the internet, b/c there are no identities besides the ID of your s/n or whatever.

 

Agreed w/Ocean Eyes ...again..I forget to mention sexual tension...that's the point that MAKES a girl want to touch you b/c of how much you're flirting with her.

 

 

 

Honestly, DropToZero, your hot-headed and I'm sure you know it...plus it wouldn't kill you to be the one who is nice, would it?

 

Depends on what you mean by nice....if you mean like I used to be...then no I won't, it would kill me lol, I was 'nice' and only nice for like 15 years of my life and it got me no good dates in HS, and rarely any close girl friends.

 

Hot headed?...no....you misunderstand...I'm just tired of typing these same ideas over and over again...Shy and I are always goin at it yea I admit tho. I've just been trying to spread what I've learned as much as I can....and its goin soo slowly. Yet every guy I have helped in PM's...has said I'm helping them....so you can tell me whatever you want...I know I'm helping other guys get the girls they are attracted to.

[spatzcolumbo]

Wow so i have been away from the boards for a few weeks, and i check back and still Shysoul and the others are debating the whole nice guy / teasing thing.

 

As i've said countless times before, why do nice guy and teasing have to be kept separate?

 

I'm a nice guy, but i tease women in a fun way that they enjoy. Old news to half the people who are reading this post - they've heard me say it before.

 

Teasing can be fun if you know the other person enjoys it. All it does (as has been said before) is create and stimulate sexual tension. The next time you walk into a crowd of people, and that girl is there, she will IMMEDIATELY be on her toes ready for whatever you might throw at her as a teasing remark. SHe notices you straight away, and is ready for the fun that you're about to have. I'm not saying that this doesn't happen with Shy's techniques - i'm sure it does. What i AM saying is that the teasing humour thing works for me, and i love it when a woman teases me back - it shows she has a sharp mind and can use it for other things than serious conversation. It shows she has a fun side that matches my fun side.

 

Point in case, a few months ago i was at the pub with some friends, and a girl who i flirt with a lot walked in and saw our group. The guy sitting next to me got up to leave, and the girl immediately looked at me with a grin on her face and said "oh great look who i get to sit next to" sarcastically. I pointed to an empty table in the corner and said "there's room over there", and so the teasing / flirting begins for the whole night...and we're laughing and joking with each other all night!! Nothing wrong with that!!

 

Anyway i've said enough!!

[shes2smart]

As i've said countless times before, why do nice guy and teasing have to be kept separate?

 

They don't. After umpteen million years doing radio (ok, it's really only been 22 years, but some days it feels like umpteen million), I can tell you the key....shared with me by one of my former Program Directors many years ago.

 

There's a line between "funny" and "mean".....the key is staying on the funny side of the line.

 

Some people don't understand where the line is and go too far. Some people have no sense of humor or are so politically correct that they don't find anything funny. Everyone's going to define that line differently.

 

When you're dealing with a large group of people (like a radio audience), if you connect to your listeners at all, you do get a sense of where the majority of them draw that line. Once you get that sense, you know how far you can go.

 

While I am discussing this from the professional part of my life, much of it still applies to the personal. KNOW YOUR AUDIENCE. Once you do, you'll be able to get that sense of how far is "too far" and what topics are off limits for smart remarks.

[spatzcolumbo]

2smart, that was my point exactly, and you backed it up

 

Its like i said a while ago in a different thread - you have to know who you are talking to, what flicks their switch, and what switches them off!!

 

If you can work that out, then you're on the right track. Alongside this in relationship terms is that you are more than likely going to weed out the people who don't do anything for you (in terms of flicking YOUR switch). If someone responds well to something, and you find it fun, then the attraction might build.

 

I like to think that i am socially aware enough to be able to interact on a number of different levels. I said to shysoul before that i think it is important to be able to talk to different people in different ways. You say about there being the 'line' and this rings true with my theory. Everyone has a different 'line' and the hard part is working out how to talk to them. I like to think that i talk differently to people i am attracted to, whilst still being true to who i am. On another level, i will not talk that way to someone i am just friends with, or someone i work with.

 

The teasing usually naturally comes out when i am attracted to someone - and i generally manage to judge them correctly.

 

i think you are right when you say that social interactions and things at work can often act as good parallels to things in your personal life.

 

Equally there are different KINDS of funny and teasing. There are the funny lines i can come out with around my friends, and then there are the funny and teasing things i can come out with when flirting. They are completely different. The flirting funny is usually a lot more risque and subtly plays to a very different level than the 'normal funny'.

 

Does that make sense?