Removing shoes before entering

[ignite]

My lodger has lived with me for almost two years now and one of the rules I had for my apartment is no shoes when inside. He definitely complied for some time early on but as time went by I think he has not been bothered to take them off at the door and then enter the flat. Last week I noticed when he came in he had them on again and before then, I was away. I have a feeling he's been doing this every day for a long time. So this is disrespectful now. 

I think when someone gets comfortable living somewhere even if that place doesn't belong to them, they start taking things for granted. 

Do you insist on guests and people who live with you removing their footwear whilst inside? 

[yogacat]

1 minute ago, ignite said:

Do you insist on guests and people who live with you removing their footwear whilst inside? 

Yes....🤗

[Seraphim]

No one I know wears shoes inside , could be a Canadian thing though. 

[Starlight925]

I don't care if people keep their shoes on.  In fact, I encourage them to keep them on if they ask.  

My friends/family are the same.  I've never been asked to remove my shoes.

But if you have a house rule, then yes, your guests/lodgers need to follow it.

[Coily]

For my house, I don't really care; unless I have just resealed my floors. But when I visit, I usually ask and follow the host's request.

[ShySoul]

Two of us in the place, we both place our shoes on a mat by the front door as soon as we enter. The rare guest understands the rules as well. Only an issue when the maintenance people have to come in. 😒

Why have dirty shoes messing up the clean floors?

[MissCanuck]

In my homeland of the Great White North (Canada), it is indeed customary to remove your shoes when entering someone's house.  

Where I live now (in the Mediterranean), it is not. People often wear shoes inside the home. 

Having said that, your issue doesn't really depend on general social norms. You have asked that he not wear shoes in your house. He is not respecting that, which makes it not acceptable. 

[Kwothe28]

6 hours ago, ignite said:

Do you insist on guests and people who live with you removing their footwear whilst inside? 

Depends. My house never insisted on it. Its normal when there is snow or harsh weather outside to remove your shoes. But other than that, my family and me never were insistent on guest removing shoes. Now my dads home, they always insisted on removing shoe inside. They have small hall when you enter where you remove them and take slippers if you want.

[Seraphim]

7 hours ago, MissCanuck said:

In my homeland of the Great White North (Canada), it is indeed customary to remove your shoes when entering someone's house.  

Where I live now (in the Mediterranean), it is not. People often wear shoes inside the home. 

Having said that, your issue doesn't really depend on general social norms. You have asked that he not wear shoes in your house. He is not respecting that, which makes it not acceptable. 

I agree, Canadian here and I have never known anyone who wears shoes in the house and in the winter not even remotely possible . 

[tattoobunnie]

Also an Asian thing.  I always take off my shoes, including my kids.  My husband on the other hand, can walk through ugh, I dunno, grossness, and never takes his shoes off.  He has mad ortho issues from a debilitating injury in his late teens, so I don't press, even though I tell him no shoes nation here.  I don't make this a battle, because any guests of mine are welcome to keep their shoes on.

[Batya33]

17 hours ago, ignite said:

My lodger has lived with me for almost two years now and one of the rules I had for my apartment is no shoes when inside. He definitely complied for some time early on but as time went by I think he has not been bothered to take them off at the door and then enter the flat. Last week I noticed when he came in he had them on again and before then, I was away. I have a feeling he's been doing this every day for a long time. So this is disrespectful now. 

I think when someone gets comfortable living somewhere even if that place doesn't belong to them, they start taking things for granted. 

Do you insist on guests and people who live with you removing their footwear whilst inside? 

Yes once we had our son. I made an exception for my MIL who used a walker. I have our maintenance staff put on foot covers.

[Cherylyn]

No shoes allowed in my house and same with my childhood house.  I have a 5 tiered shoe rack in my garage near the entry way door in the foyer.  We always enter the house through the garage and never through the front door.  Upon coming home or if in and out of the garage to retrieve something from the garage refrigerator and freezer,  we wear slide sandals or flip flops.  Shoes are placed on the shoe rack and we wear the slip on sandals which are immediately outside the indoor door.  We slip those on,  get what we need from the garage or the in-garage mail slot,  then back into the edge of the house,  slip off the slide sandals against the garage door and walk shoe-less on the indoor floor.  It keeps the house cleaner longer. 

For contractors or visitors,  we provide disposable shoe covers.  In the past,  I provided indoor slippers for them which were washed after they wore them so they're clean the next time they're at my house.

Whenever I visit my local in-laws,  they wear shoes indoors as do we at their house.  I don't understand how anyone can wear shoes indoors and be fine with a baby crawling on floors with public restroom bacteria on their shoes but as long as it's their house and not my house,  I'm fine.  (My sons did not crawl on floors where people walked indoors with their shoes.) 

 

[yogacat]

I have light colored carpet so that's why shoes come off. Otherwise, you can see dirt accumulating and it's very hard for me to get it out even with renting a professional rug cleaning machine. I think if I had hardwood floors I would not care as much. Hardwood floors are much easier to quickly clean vs. light colored carpets 😩

I say you're right in that aspect; maybe he has become too comfortable in the apartment and is not consciously breaking the rule. Let him know how much it means to you to have a clean and shoe-free home and remind him of the reasons. Just because you're away doesn't mean the mice can play 😂

[rabbitrok]

I've noticed in America this tends to be generational. The 40 and under crowd remove their shoes, while often older people won't. Growing up my Silent Gen parents usually wore shoes inside (this was also a health thing for them) but I, a millenial, definitely tell everyone to remove their shoes

[Batya33]

6 hours ago, rabbitrok said:

I've noticed in America this tends to be generational. The 40 and under crowd remove their shoes, while often older people won't. Growing up my Silent Gen parents usually wore shoes inside (this was also a health thing for them) but I, a millenial, definitely tell everyone to remove their shoes

For me it wasn't generational it was because I had a baby and even before he crawled he often had his diaper changed on a mat on the floor - so I didn't want to put the mat over gross stuff from the bottom of people's shoes.  I was in my 40s when I became a parent. My parents were born in the 1930s and no one really took off their shoes inside but there was also less knowledge about how germs spread etc.