Relationship advice?

[Moe]

‘60/M’ and ‘48/F’

 

 

Met a man on a dating app. We have been dating exclusively for two months. Here is the story. We talked and texted constantly for a month. I was relocating and needed some help throwing away furniture and he offered to come help me so I did not have to pay. He lives 5 hours away. I accepted and we agreed if we did not feel a connection, we would understand and he would leave. He was at my home for a weekend it was also my birthday. We celebrated and really hit it off. He helped me throw out all my large furniture and left back home for work Monday morning at 5am. One thing I have noticed is he is a very hard worker. The following weekend I was moving 2 hours closer to him and he came to my new place and helped me build all my furniture here. Weekend after that same, he came built more furniture, this was all his offering. Took me to dinner and the past two weeks he had a trip to visit his daughter in another state and granddaughter, the daughter is going through a divorce. We texted constantly and spoke once on the phone. He was there for 2 weeks. Upon his return everything changed. His mother is alone and he is with her a lot to help her but she is older and seems difficult. Her husband passed recently and he is her only family member left. He had one brother who was his best friend and he passed during Covid. 

 

He texted Sunday upon his return that he was resting and tired. Monday was very distant, I tried calling and texting no reply. Tuesday no contact. Wed I send him a text that I was worried and if he is ok and he replied that his daughter wants him to go back to the state because the soon to be x is acting like a jerk and she would like him there. His mom told him he can’t leave cause she feels bad and needs him with her. He got blood work done and they asked him to come back for more blood work and a colonoscopy and that he feels like he is being pulled in every direction. Of course I was compassionate and told him that I’m here if he needs a friend and that everything would be ok. Thursday no contact. Friday I did send a text asking him to talk to me because this is also not the pattern we shared. We have had the conversation about being exclusive and his behavior has matched that he was interested in a future together. He never replied to my message.  So one week of going very cold. Trying to make sense of this. 

[shouldhavelearned]

He should at least respond.

He probably does feel like he's being pulled in different directions. That's not a reason to do what he's doing.

[Moe]

I agree. I won’t text him again. If this is how he deals with stress, that’s not a good sign I think. At least communicate. It was night and day behavior since he returned from his trip. 

[HeartGoesOn]

I could be wrong, but it seems there's more to this than what he's telling you.

[Moe]

Anything is possible 

[TeeDee]

2 hours ago, Moe said:

Trying to make sense of this. 

He likes you but with everything else going on in his life, he's already over extended.  Dating & you have to be a low priority right now.  So bottom line is the timing isn't right.  There is nothing you can do except let him go

[Batya33]

My best guess is something happened during your time apart after recently meeting that changed his mind particularly since so much of  your short relationship was focused on him helping you for free basically.  Then he went to help family -it's a lot on him -or perhaps he met or reconnected with someone there. I know he offered. I find it odd how much help  you accepted from a stranger and that you invited him to your home the first time you met. Something is a bit off here so I'm not shocked he would ghost.  I'm sorry you're disappointed.

[maryamnawaz]

It will not going to work anymore