Need some advice on how to proceed

[Dragoncdf]

Ok this girl I met at work we started talking about a month ago. We went out to eat and back to my house to talk. She’s been to my house several times now and we hang out all the time. We recently went to the movies. We spend one of my breaks at work together and when I get off I hang out with her at work for an hour. We talk all the time on the phone. She calls me sweetie and we hug. The other day she talked about wanting to work out and called herself fat and I told her she wasn’t fat she was beautiful. That made her smile. When I tell her people are asking if we are a couple she says friends. One time she said friends for now. Do you think she wants more than friends? I feel like she does but I’ve been wrong before. How should I proceed?

[Cherylyn]

Treat her as a friend.  Continue being a real gentleman,  mind your manners and respect her stance. 

Since you work together,  think of the future should a relationship with her go awry.  Then you still work together and it will be awkward and uncomfortable.  🤨

Remaining friends or better yet as acquaintances is safer as long as you work together.

If you want more than friendship,  it's risky especially with a colleague.  Best to pump the brakes by remaining professional yet cordial without getting chummy,  no more "friendlies" outside the work environment and be wise.  🫢

[Andrina]

You two have different relationship goals so this will not work. In your shoes, I'd go back to being pleasant co-workers and let her know for your own good, no more hanging out. Why? No potential date you have will be comfortable with this "friendship" you have with her. It'll be a one-side emotional affair which will be holding you back from bonding with someone who's available to you to date.

To answer your question, words and action have to match. She's a touchy-feely friend who probably said friends for now to spare your feelings, but she's doing you no favors to not be clear-cut.

[shouldhavelearned]

Yeah, be up front and call it a date.

 

She declines, there you go.