People who make claims of being well off say one thing and do another

[WorkSux56]

12 hours ago, Jaunty said:

People who have a great deal of discretionary income to spend live differently than those of us who either don't have it or don't choose to spend lavishly.  If we've been to someone's home, gone to restaurants,  entertainment, or traveled with them, or observed what kind of stuff they have, we will get a clue.   

The people we surround ourselves with definitely develop a sense of our general financial situation as well. 

In what ways are you so bad bad bad with your bucks?  

Well, I can't really explain it. We just click as friends. I kind of doubt that they are privy to details of my life without me knowing it. Not unless they did something like run a credit check on me, but them doing so without my knowledge or consent would be illegal. My money situation just hasn't really come up. I've gone on some hunting trips with one of them where I purchased my license and pitched in so as to cover the ammo I used and any food and beverages I consumed. I used his rifle, of course. And they have had me over to their homes. I've done things with each of them where they just treated me. They know that I am not just rolling in dough. They see that I'm just an average working class guy. But details have just never really come up . 

[SophiaG]

19 hours ago, WorkSux56 said:

they really should just keep their mouths shut.

Why should they? It feels good (to some people) to boast. And when situations like this come up they can just change their mind and tell you to get lost like they did.

[SophiaG]

2 hours ago, WorkSux56 said:

And they have had me over to their homes. I've done things with each of them where they just treated me. They know that I am not just rolling in dough. They see that I'm just an average working class guy. But details have just never really come up .

Rich people can be observant and snobby. They don't need any details. With the apparent wealth gap they probably already mentally prepared for the day you come to them for money and were ready to tell you off and discard you as a friend. Sorry for the disappointment, but there is really not a lot more to be done there. Meanwhile, you can make all the changes in YOUR power to turn your financial situation around. Are you going to do that?

[Batya33]

6 minutes ago, SophiaG said:

Rich people can be observant and snobby. They don't need any details. With the apparent wealth gap they probably already mentally prepared for the day you come to them for money and were ready to tell you off and discard you as a friend. Sorry for the disappointment, but there is really not a lot more to be done there. Meanwhile, you can make all the changes in YOUR power to turn your financial situation around. Are you going to do that?

Certain people who are rich can be snobby.  I've met people with little money who are as well.  Just having money doesn't make you one way or the other as far as character and integrity. OP they didn't have to do a credit check -I agree they sensed how you were with and about money.  

[tattoobunnie]

16 hours ago, WorkSux56 said:

I really do appreciate the responses here. But I have said,. multiple times now, that they didn't know a thing about my financial situation. Not unless they are somehow privy to details about my life and they become privy without my knowledge. In which case, that would raise many other questions. I really do doubt that that is the case, as they would have said to me that they are fully aware of my financial situation. I keep on saying that I never got the chance to explain anything to them. They had NO clue as to what I was about to say before they chewed me out about they didn't have money just lying around. I have stated this over and over again and still, the responses I get are "well they know how bad you are with money". Am I bad with money? Of course. But they don't know that. This point keeps getting missed 

If you know how to work within budgets and manage money, a person can guestimate how much you earn, save, and spend by your job, car and living situation, how often you eat out vs cooking.  It's very easy to spot a house poor person.  

Not trying to be a jerk, but "A fool and his money are soon parted."  Instead, ask them advice on how to get out of the mess you made. You defaulted on a loan because you are overspending on a lifestyle you cannot afford.

[Seraphim]

6 minutes ago, Batya33 said:

Certain people who are rich can be snobby.  I've met people with little money who are as well.  Just having money doesn't make you one way or the other as far as character and integrity. OP they didn't have to do a credit check -I agree they sensed how you were with and about money.  

I agree , my brother is wealthy and isn’t snobby at all . He is also a financial advisor and helps others become wealthy or better off than they are. 

[waffle]

On 9/11/2024 at 1:39 PM, WorkSux56 said:

"I have WAY more money than I'll ever need. If you ever get into a jam, financially, don't hesitate to ask. I've got your back". There's the quote. 

Was alcohol being consumed during this conversation?

I think we are missing a LOT of context here.  How did this subject even come up?  What was being talked about that prompted this comment?  Were both friends in attendance or were these comments made separately by the friends in question?  How long was it (timeframe) between this/these comment(s) and your request attempt(s)? 

Personally I think your friends are braggarts .  And therefore probably broke.  That would explain a lot, wouldn't it?  Which brings me back to my original question. . . how drunk was everyone?

[yogacat]

For two friends to have such a visceral reaction so quickly, in two separate cases, is bizarre.

It's described as almost as 'lashing out' towards you.

I understand if a person doesn't want to loan anyone money, for whatever reason. And yes, they are within their rights to be put off if they feel it 'for charity' in any sense. But what I can't understand the reaction of each [-]friend[-].

I would think they would just say something like "I know I said that I'd help you, but I've reconsidered". If they don't want to engage in such a conversation, why offer so unmistakably strong of support in the first place? 

In any case: We obviously cannot tell you what your friends' motivation was and what they were thinking.

And it is also somehow besides the point, really.

I think what matters is that you learned that asking them for financial help won't go well so better avoid doing so. 

That may hurt since you were encouraged to do so by them before. So, you were let down. But in a way you may have been too bold in your request and that set them off. Also, your motivation might be different than theirs.

The underlying dynamic is that you brought them in a situation where they felt cornered and where they had to explain and they didn't like it. Some people hate to be in that position, friends or not. So, it was open confrontation, in a way, too. They didn't respond as you would have liked but they responded in some way.

Again: In a way that is not helpful for your need but you tried. It failed. So now you know what to expect. 

[WorkSux56]

7 minutes ago, waffle said:

Was alcohol being consumed during this conversation?

I think we are missing a LOT of context here.  How did this subject even come up?  What was being talked about that prompted this comment?  Were both friends in attendance or were these comments made separately by the friends in question?  How long was it (timeframe) between this/these comment(s) and your request attempt(s)? 

Personally I think your friends are braggarts .  And therefore probably broke.  That would explain a lot, wouldn't it?  Which brings me back to my original question. . . how drunk was everyone?

We were drinking, pretty buzzed. They may well be braggarts and broke and I was too blind to see it 

[WorkSux56]

2 minutes ago, yogacat said:

The underlying dynamic is that you brought them in a situation where they felt cornered and where they had to explain and they didn't like it. Some people hate to be in that position, friends or not. So, it was open confrontation, in a way, too. They didn't respond as you would have liked but they responded in some way.

 

Can you clarify what you mean by me bringing them into a situation where they felt cornered? Because...I don't THINK that's what I did. In both cases, all I got out was "here is my situation. Tell me what you think". That's all I got out before they lashed out. At that point, my intention was to lay out my situation and then see what they thought. They became hostile and cut me off. If they were sensing a money request, I could understand some standoffishness on their part. But, to be downright hostile at the very notion of me even asking for their thoughts on my situation? That's what too me aback. Perhaps you meant that I made them feel cornered by asking for their thoughts on my situation. I'm beginning to piece together that those two guys don't have money. At least not like they tried to portray. They very well may be frauds. But, that doesn't mean that I am any less at fault for my own situation. Nobody placed a gun to my head and made me mess up. I am the sole party responsible there. It's time for me to brush up on my bartending skills and take some side gigs 

[Batya33]

5 hours ago, WorkSux56 said:

We were drinking, pretty buzzed. They may well be braggarts and broke and I was too blind to see it 

So you chose to drink and chose the consequences - I am shocked you didn't share this in your first post and it makes it much more clear that there is more to the story - asking someone for money -loan or gift -is a huge ask and very serious -you chose to do it when you were drunk and so were they. 

If you mean they said you could borrow money for any reason and said this while drunk I mean it's common sense that people who choose to drink choose the consequences of blurting stuff out.

[Tinydance]

On 9/12/2024 at 2:43 AM, WorkSux56 said:

Well people need to quit sauntering up to me like movie stars who just got out of a limo and talking about how they "got my back" only to scream their heads off later. When somebody boasts of having more money than God, a person like me is going to naturally think of that as a loan option and as a way to begin bettering my situation 

Well dude (you are one right? Lol), I hate to say it but it's not really their problem that you're in a bad financial position. As you said, you admit it's all your own doing. And sure you could borrow money from them but you said you're terrible with money. So then you'd just spend it and ask for more. Unless you're actually homeless you need to take responsibility over your own life. They don't actually owe you anything. Also just because someone is rich why do they HAVE to give someone money? I mean I'm not rich but I can go up to every homeless person I see and buy them all food and clothes. I can afford it but I prefer to spend the money on myself and my own family. I don't think that makes me an a - hole.

[Tinydance]

In all fairness I think every one of us is probably financially better off than someone else. E.g. We could all probably give some money to a homeless person. And yes it's nice to help people but I don't think you're a bad person if you don't. And to be honest I'd be more inclined to help a homeless person than a friend who's bad with their money and that's why they need help. 

[Cooley]

OP...my guy!! Where do I even begin? Well, let's unpack some stuff, shall we? 🙂 First off, I've been where you are. I've made bad decisions with the green. I had to learn the hard way to be better with it. I've been on the other side too, meaning I've "loaned" it out. Chalk that up to another bad decision. A loan is a gift by another name. I have only been paid back once, and I did like the creditors do when someone defaults. Settled for pennies on the dollar. It was a relative. Yeah...never again. BE BETTER, my guy! It starts with you! I had to look at my reflection in the mirror and say those words to the guy looking back at me.

As for your buddies...they may have SOME money, but not as much as they let on. I don't know them, but going off my own experiences, people who brag, well, they are oftentimes overcompensating for something. Slamming a few cold ones and telling you they "got your back". How credible did you REALLY think that was? Your buddies are NOT among the 1%. That much I can say with total confidence. Look, people SAY things all the time. I have heard of people making such "offers". At best, take that with a HUGE grain of salt. That wasn't light at the end of the tunnel. It was a freight train coming your way. You say you need to brush up on your bartending skills. Shoot, do that. You can make some nice side money. That's your lifeline. Not somebody else with money. And please, please, unlearn that "share the wealth" nonsense. Don't be a hippie. That gets you nowhere. 

I'm not trying to pile on, and make you feel worse. I did the same thing. I once lived off of daddy government. I had NO shame in taking a handout. But, you know what I was doing? I was STEALING from those who actually worked. Their tax dollars kept me afloat. And those working people's taxes were going up because people like me were bumming instead of working. You know the saying. No such thing as a free lunch. I had to start over and remake myself a few times. I THINK I got it right the last time. Fingers crossed. At least you recognized that it's on you. So, do what you gotta do to fix you! And for crying out loud, pay your buddies no mind. They can't do squat for you anyways. Not that it's their job to, but no...they couldn't, even if they wanted to. Drunk or sober, anybody who says "I have way more money than I will ever need" is clearly in la la land. You can do this. I did it. And like I said, I was a bum. Ask for guidance (not money 🤨) along the way. No shame in that. 

Anytime anyone says anything about "having your back" be it with money or just anything, again, don't read too much into it. It sounds nice, sure. But...it's not what it sounds like. At the end of the day, YOU gotta have YOUR back. Just like I gotta have my back. At any rate, I hope this helps. 

[Cooley]

17 hours ago, Batya33 said:

So you chose to drink and chose the consequences - I am shocked you didn't share this in your first post and it makes it much more clear that there is more to the story - asking someone for money -loan or gift -is a huge ask and very serious -you chose to do it when you were drunk and so were they. 

If you mean they said you could borrow money for any reason and said this while drunk I mean it's common sense that people who choose to drink choose the consequences of blurting stuff out.

NOTHING good ever comes from alcohol consumption 

[Jaunty]

OP - do you question yourself at all for expecting to hold people to things they said when drinking?   

Seriously, I think you need some hardcore reality checks on several fronts.

1)  Get responsible for your own financial life

2) Do not expect other people to bail you out, especially casual acquaintances 

3) Stop taking things people say when drunk / partying as actually for real

[Cherylyn]

I will go against the grain here by saying this: 

You have to learn human nature.  Some people are hypocrites who talk too much.  They claim to be well off,  they make false promises to help you when you're a friend in need yet when it's time to deliver,  you are rejected and snubbed.  This is the way of the world for many.  Grow accustomed to it.  Don't be naive.  🤨

Should you confront them and they sense your realizing their hypocrisy,  they'll become either defensive,  gaslight you (deflect /  change your perception of the facts / change the subject),  make excuses,  admonish you and do anything to release them from taking responsibility for what they've said to you in the past.  Another tactic is for them to tell you they don't want to talk about it and they'll shut you down just like that.  You're toast.  You might as well talk to a wall because the result is the same.  You'll get absolutely NOWHERE.  Most people would never admit fault if their very life depended on it.  You will always be to blame.  The best thing to do is not engage in the first place.  It's an effort in futility. 

No,  they didn't regret saying anything to you.  They would just deal with it later which is a flat out "NO" to you. 

Don't be confused nor hurt.  Accept the ugly side of human nature and nothing in this life would ever shock you anymore.  Grow thicker skin.  Don't put people on a pedestal and don't put stock in people.  This is how it is with people.  Change the way you think and you will lower your expectations and lower your standards in people meaning they don't always possess the integrity you envision.  Expect less to nil of people and you'll have a reality check regarding people in general no matter who they are ~ friends,  acquaintances,  family, everyone. 

Many people or friends are "Good Time Charlies" and "fair weather friends" meaning whenever times are good,  everyone has a good time,  all is merry and jolly.  Then when it comes to survival,  suddenly,  it's a different story. 🫢 It's every man or woman for himself or herself.  It's a very serious,  cut throat,  dog eat dog world out there.  😠  Life is fiercely competitive. 

A lot of people are financially comfortable.  However,  I don't hear many people promising to have your financial back when you need them.  It was wrong of your friends to go so far as to say they will help you when you're in trouble.  They should've kept their mouths shut.  😷  They shouldn't have offered to help you someday if they have no intentions to deliver.  This is why they're hypocrites.  They're not the type of people to follow through with their promises and instead,  they back peddle and admonish you for your folly.

Also know that some people have lent money to others only for them never to see their loaned money 💰ever again. 😠 Not that you're the type to never repay but it does happen.  Or, when returned favors are expected someday,  there are none to be had and some people felt cheated,  deceived and betrayed.  This unfair arrangement doesn't always apply to money either.  Some people have helped others in other ways and when it's their turn to ask for help or need help in any form,  they're either met with excuses or silence.  It happens.  Or,  if people do anything for you or give anything to you,  they're awfully cheap and stingy. 

All of my relations with friends and family do not revolve around money.  This is why we're compatible.  We're not banks nor lending institutions.  We don't mooch off each other.  Everyone pays their own way in our relationships. 

Money creates a lot of discord amongst friends and family.  It's a fast way to make enemies.  😡  The two do not mix.

Another thing to consider is your friends who are not real friends who say something but don't mean it.  They're just full of hot air. 😩 Not that you should expect anything from them but you need to choose your friends more wisely.  Don't be with friends who talk but don't walk the talk.  They don't mind boasting how well off they are and they make insincere offers to you.  They're not worth admiring nor respecting.  None of my friends act like yours.  My friends know how to behave properly and honorably. 

As for you,  you may not like it but you'll have to accept how this world works and it's not always in your favor.  It's either sink or swim and people only want a good time with you.  Whether you need a job,  money,  help,  labor or care,  most of the time,  you're on your own.  It's a harsh reality check.  No one has your back except you.  😐

 

 

[ShySoul]

Money is an artifical human concept in the first place. You can't take it when you go and when die, it won't matter how much you had. Rich or poor, we all end up in the same place. 

It is far from a measure of a person's worth and not something to be proud of or to criticize others for. It's not something to brag about. And if you don't have it, there could be many reasons including things beyond your control.

If people offer to lend money, they should be willing to go through with it or just not offer at all. Don't be a hypocrite who promises one thing and then backs out when someone actually needs you. If you really do have all that money, then it's not going to kill you to lend, or even give, some. I'm sure you can cut back on a few things if it is really that big an imposition. For starters, a little less alcohol.

And if you are really so smart with your money, why not impart that knowledge to the other person instead of bragging about it and making them feel worse. Teach a man to fish and they will be fed their whole life.

On 9/12/2024 at 11:15 AM, WorkSux56 said:

But, to be downright hostile at the very notion of me even asking for their thoughts on my situation? That's what too me aback...But, that doesn't mean that I am any less at fault for my own situation. Nobody placed a gun to my head and made me mess up. I am the sole party responsible there. It's time for me to brush up on my bartending skills and take some side gigs 

Not seeing you are at fault here. If you didn't even ask for the funds, then they overreacted. And there is a good chance it was all silly posturing on their part.

That you are taking responsibility for messing up is also good. I don't sense you were leeching off of them or asking anything unreasonable. Going to someone for help us a difficult thing as it as, something that is a last resort. I don't see that you wanted to do it, or even had a chance to do it. And you seem to want to get out of the hole you are in. Good for you.

Sorry if I missed it, but what was the issue that caused your financial problems in the first place? Do you have a way to address that? Working extra jobs can help get you back on your feet, but unless you address what went wrong, I worry you will repeat the mistakes and fall right back down. Do you need any assitance with that?

[Tinydance]

1 minute ago, ShySoul said:

Money is an artifical human concept in the first place. You can't take it when you go and when die, it won't matter how much you had. Rich or poor, we all end up in the same place. 

It is far from a measure of a person's worth and not something to be proud of or to criticize others for. It's not something to brag about. And if you don't have it, there could be many reasons including things beyond your control.

If people offer to lend money, they should be willing to go through with it or just not offer at all. Don't be a hypocrite who promises one thing and then backs out when someone actually needs you. If you really do have all that money, then it's not going to kill you to lend, or even give, some. I'm sure you can cut back on a few things if it is really that big an imposition. For starters, a little less alcohol.

And if you are really so smart with your money, why not impart that knowledge to the other person instead of bragging about it and making them feel worse. Teach a man to fish and they will be fed their whole life.

Not seeing you are at fault here. If you didn't even ask for the funds, then they overreacted. And there is a good chance it was all silly posturing on their part.

That you are taking responsibility for messing up is also good. I don't sense you were leeching off of them or asking anything unreasonable. Going to someone for help us a difficult thing as it as, something that is a last resort. I don't see that you wanted to do it, or even had a chance to do it. And you seem to want to get out of the hole you are in. Good for you.

Sorry if I missed it, but what was the issue that caused your financial problems in the first place? Do you have a way to address that? Working extra jobs can help get you back on your feet, but unless you address what went wrong, I worry you will repeat the mistakes and fall right back down. Do you need any assitance with that?

If I may just play devil's advocate here. I think people can be in different financial situations at different times in their life. For example, they might say they can help out when they're single and don't have kids or much life commitments. Then later they get married and have kids so their expenses and commitments are much bigger. Or for example if someone has a high paying job and they say they "got you" but then they lose the job. 

I just felt a bit iffy about this post because the OP admitted he's really bad with money. Like, if your friend is struggling for a legitimate reason like they've been robbed or victim of domestic violence, of course you try to help. But if they're just bad with money the motivation to help would be a lot lower for me. If let's say a friend said to me they can't make rent or bills and I gave them money. But they spent it on entertainment and still didn't cover the rent or bills. That would make me mad and not inclined to help them again. It's just an example.

[ShySoul]

13 minutes ago, Tinydance said:

If I may just play devil's advocate here. I think people can be in different financial situations at different times in their life. For example, they might say they can help out when they're single and don't have kids or much life commitments. Then later they get married and have kids so their expenses and commitments are much bigger. Or for example if someone has a high paying job and they say they "got you" but then they lose the job. 

I just felt a bit iffy about this post because the OP admitted he's really bad with money. Like, if your friend is struggling for a legitimate reason like they've been robbed or victim of domestic violence, of course you try to help. But if they're just bad with money the motivation to help would be a lot lower for me. If let's say a friend said to me they can't make rent or bills and I gave them money. But they spent it on entertainment and still didn't cover the rent or bills. That would make me mad and not inclined to help them again. It's just an example.

I agree with on you on all points.

Of course you should only loan what you can afford, and situations can change. And a person shouldn't expect free handouts all the time. But I don't believe he was doing that. Didn't seem like they even gave anything a chance either. There were no explanations on either side. 

I skimmed the post, so honestly I might have missed something. But I'm wondering why the poster is bad with money. Seems like figuring out what went wrong with asking them is a waste of time and the real focus should be on what his financial issues are and how to address them. Would like more information on that to see if he could be pointed in the right direction and actually fix the root of the problem so he won't have to ask anyone again.

And feel free to be a devil's advocate with me anytime. I've actually been very impressed by your posts lately. You're smart and I appreciate how open to things you are.

[Batya33]

8 hours ago, Tinydance said:

If I may just play devil's advocate here. I think people can be in different financial situations at different times in their life. For example, they might say they can help out when they're single and don't have kids or much life commitments. Then later they get married and have kids so their expenses and commitments are much bigger. Or for example if someone has a high paying job and they say they "got you" but then they lose the job. 

I just felt a bit iffy about this post because the OP admitted he's really bad with money. Like, if your friend is struggling for a legitimate reason like they've been robbed or victim of domestic violence, of course you try to help. But if they're just bad with money the motivation to help would be a lot lower for me. If let's say a friend said to me they can't make rent or bills and I gave them money. But they spent it on entertainment and still didn't cover the rent or bills. That would make me mad and not inclined to help them again. It's just an example.

Same. To me money is extremely real.  Making it, saving it, spending it and the freedoms it can bring. It means we can now send our son to a private school that is not only so much safer but it's his dream school -he loves it - it means that my stress level is decreased because we can afford to have him take teen uber home if his carpool ride doesn't work out or some other unusual situation and because we can afford it I'm not stressed about where is this extra $ going to come from? It means for real I was able to donate to my friend's daughter's gofundme as she is trying to write a kids book and she is a kid.  It means for real if the power goes out and our food goes bad it's a hassle to replace but we can afford it with our real money - and that really helps my mental and physical health -that sense of security.  I have money because I worked hard for it (not everyone has money because of hard work, I get it).  And that means I can give more to charity.  I strongly prefer giving to causes over individuals. 

And yes money is real in its impact so a person who has money might not suddenly because of a poor investment, illness in the family, flood damage to a home.  There are also private reasons that the person asking might not be aware of.  

I did give $$ to someone who was bad with money many years ago because it affected my extended family's well being.  I regretted it as it  was never paid back by that person -another family member had to pay it back to me.  So frustrating.  It wasn't a small amount at all. I hope never to have to be in that situation ever again.

[Cooley]

I really like the last several replies. The OP needs encouraging. He sounds a lot like me, as far as how I used to be. I was probably WORSE than him. I had buddies who worked while I didn't. To me, they "had money". but that wasn't saying much at all, because I had a goose egg to my name. But, I EXPECTED them to take me drinking on the weekends and buy my smokes. Granted, smoking cigarettes wasn't terribly expensive back then, but still, me expecting draft beer and cigarettes to be covered by friends? Ohh....embarrassing. What was wrong with me? Well, for one thing, my working buddies enabled me by covering me in the first place. I was an unemployed BUM. I didn't deserve a trip to the bar. Yet, I came to expect that from them. We actually had fights over it when they said they'd leave me at home if I didn't get a job soon. Like...I threw tantrums if they left me out of the Friday night festivities. So, to shut me up, they just took me along. Also, I had a "share the wealth" mentality. I told the OP to get out of that mindset, and I MAY have jumped the gun. I sense he MAY have that same mindset I had, but obviously, I don't know for sure. Someone told me something back then that is still resonates with me. They said "the problem with socialism is, eventually, somebody has to do the work".  How true! 

I do think that even at his WORST, the OP is not as bad as I was. OP, you CAN do it! Just get a new mentality. Cherylyn said it best. Learn human nature. Your pals gaslit you, big time. I've seen that happen. I've been gaslit many times. Shoot, I've done the gaslighting. I gaslit my working buddies with guilt trips galore. I'm certainly not proud of it. But think about it. You didn't even get one word out about your situation and they were jumping all over you, telling you how they didn't get to where they are by being stupid with money. That made you think "oh no....what do they know...and how do they know?" and you were then too freaked out to go any further. That was done to shut you down. Mission accomplished. They didn't want to even hear about it. That's people for you.

 

Hang in there!! 

 

 

[Cherylyn]

1 hour ago, Cooley said:

I really like the last several replies. The OP needs encouraging. He sounds a lot like me, as far as how I used to be. I was probably WORSE than him.

I do think that even at his WORST, the OP is not as bad as I was. OP, you CAN do it! Just get a new mentality. Cherylyn said it best. Learn human nature. Your pals gaslit you, big time. I've seen that happen. I've been gaslit many times. Shoot, I've done the gaslighting. I gaslit my working buddies with guilt trips galore. I'm certainly not proud of it. But think about it. You didn't even get one word out about your situation and they were jumping all over you, telling you how they didn't get to where they are by being stupid with money. That made you think "oh no....what do they know...and how do they know?" and you were then too freaked out to go any further. That was done to shut you down. Mission accomplished. They didn't want to even hear about it. That's people for you.

 

Hang in there!! 

 

 

Thank you @Cooley.  I appreciated your kind words. 

Yes,  learning about human nature is definitely a rude awakening to be sure.  It's a very sobering reality check. 

Naivete doesn't pay.  ☹️

When you're knowledgeable regarding human nature,  nothing ever surprises nor shocks you anymore.  It's the way of the world.