what should i do?

[kneeajfo43]

hi, i'm a 15F and my friend, also 15F, just confessed to me about being taken advantage of by a guy (16M) she considered a friend. this happened just a day ago, when they went to hangout like usual. my friend told me he was acting weird from the beginning but she just tried brushing it off. she then started telling me about how he started getting closer to her, telling her that he's liked her since 8th grade and other creepy, sexual stuff before trying to kiss her. she said that she told him that she didn't want it and kept trying to move away, but then she froze and felt like she couldn't do anything once he started touching her. i know the obvious thing to do is tell somebody, but i'm also not sure exactly how to report him and my friend is terrified to. she thinks that reporting him is going to ruin her life because he also has a picture of his hand on her and is afraid he'll spread it if she does something. she told me that because of that she doesn't want to report him, and said that she and the guy promised to keep it a secret so it'll be okay. i'm going to keep trying to persuade her to tell someone, but if she decides not to what should i do? should i just go and tell someone?

[yogacat]

I’m really sorry to hear about what happened. It’s great you’re supporting her. Let her know it wasn’t her fault and she deserves to feel safe.

Encourage her to talk to a trusted adult, like a parent or school counselor, who can offer guidance. Suggest she reach out to a confidential support service for advice and support.

Respect her choices about reporting, but if you’re worried about her safety, you might need to consider reporting it yourself. Keeping any evidence, like messages or photos, could be helpful if she decides to report later.

Your support is important, so keep being there for her and help her find the right resources when she’s ready. If she’s not ready to report it, support her decision while gently guiding her towards resources that can help her cope. Just keep being a good friend and help her find the right resources when she’s ready.

[ShySoul]

Best thing you can do is simply be her friend. Listen and support her. Comfort her and make sure she feels safe and doesn't blame herself.

Has he indicted he would reveal this photo if she tells? That's blackmail, a sign he is willing to manipulate her to get away with what he did. There is also the risk he will show it regardless and use it set whatever narrative about things he wants. 

Try to encourage her to speak out, to not let fear dictate her actions. See if she is willing to talk to an adult. But respect her choice, whatever it is. 

[Andrina]

2 hours ago, kneeajfo43 said:

i'm going to keep trying to persuade her to tell someone, but if she decides not to what should i do?

Is she ensuring she will never be alone with this guy again? Where did this happen? In one of their homes?

I'd present to her that a photo can be deleted from his phone by authorities before that photo is spread. I'd also explain that the fear and embarrassment of speaking to her parents or any other trusted adult is a small price to pay for the safety of herself and other females he most assuredly will assault. This is a baby step he's taking that will progress to far scarier behavior. When he gets away with that, he'll move up to a worse level. For the over all good of other women in his sights, he needs to get psychological help ASAP. Perhaps at his young age, mental health counseling can steer him into being a healthier human being.

Think of the guilt of knowing a monster is in the midst and staying mum, then seeing what he's done to other innocent women, which would've never happened if he'd been reported as soon as it happened. 

Good luck and let us know how it goes.