it's getting too complicated for me to comprehend

[sparkles_]

heyy so it's been quite a bit of a week for me but I just wanted to rant and get a bit of advice also this might be a bit long so yeah

basically I have been seeing so many things with my ex's name on it like I see his name so much it's crazy. so basically we met through Instagram I used to know him when we were children. we dated for like 2 months and had a wonderful relationship and I really loved him and thought I was in love but unfortunately we broke up almost like 2 months ago cause of the distance (it was me who did it) he wanted to try but I wasn’t convinced cause I’m going to be making a pretty big move soon and I just wasn’t sure it was right to continue and I also did it so I wouldn’t lose him in the long run (as we agreed to become friends like before) and it was pretty hard for both of us. and we were best friends for like a month before dating like really close so even like after the breakup we tried staying friends and used to talk cause even he said he wanted that but then he randomly started ghosting me and I thought it was to get over it but he didn't communicate and I tried talking to him for like 2 weeks and he'd just ghost and like reply really late and it was frankly annoying. but then I was missing him and sent him an entire thing on like how much I love him and want to be with him (I did this cause I realized I was losing him anyways) and he was like I would have preferred this a month ago and how he doesn't feel as strongly anymore and doesn't want to try online again. BUT THEN he said he still wants to meet me in July. and it's so confusing cause why do you wanna meet like *** and I think it might be to like make out or something cause he finds me physically attractive and most my friends think he still likes me but is just letting his ego take over cause male ego yeah. and like he was really in love with me back when we were dating and even like after it so it's weird for me to think he has moved on but maybe idk. but I just don't know why he wants to meet still and then like recently on a random Monday at 3 am his time he stopped sharing his location so idk what’s happening. And then I ended up removing him from my spam and then recently I saw he unfollowed me on Apple Music which is hilarious but still. I know he’s doing this cause it bothered him that I removed him from my spam and is being petty. and I asked for a sign if it’s really going to work out and I saw his name on a random car so lol.

pls help and send advice

[TeeDee]

First paragraphs are your friends.  Use them.  You will get more responses if somebody doesn't have to read a wall of text.  

This is a problem of your own making. 

These are the salient facts that jumped out at me: 

• You knew each other as kids 
• You reconnected on social media 
• Based solely on this reconnection you claim the two of you were "best friends" for a month before you started dating 
• You dated for 2 months & claim you were both in love
• Despite being "in love" you broke up with him because you anticipate making a "big move" "soon
• After you dumped him, you are now mad because he's no longer at your beck & call 

 

Sorry but it sounds like you have no idea what love or friendship looks like.  Both take years to develop & solidify. Both involve loyalty.  Your behavior was much too flighty.  You jerked this poor guy around for at least 3 months & don't understand why he doesn't care to prioritize you.  Get over yourself.   Leave him be.  Perhaps send a holiday card or occasionally like a social media post but after what you put him though why would he want to be your friend, just to get more of the same? 

Best of luck with your big move.  

[ShySoul]

You are both to busy playing games and reacting out of fear and insecurity. A real relationship needs communication, honesty and trust. Instead we have a situation were you each try to pull the other in only to push them away. As long as that happens, you will never get anywhere and only become more fustrated at things. That applies not just here, but any potential future relationships.

What are your actual feelings for him? Throwing out all the extra nonsense and just looking at who he is as a person and how well the two of you relate to each other, is this someone you can see yourself with? Is this someone who you would want to put in the time and effort to have a real relationship with? If not, let it be. If so, then you need to take a look at your behavior and figure out how to not engage in some of the things you've done. Same with him. You would need to learn how to have a mature relationship where you set groundrules, talking and communicating on what each of you needs to feel secure.