Need suggestions

[Sutopa]

What to do when my bf wanting to meet with or talk with my parents, but my parents are not approving it and don’t even want to talk?

[AndyPandy]

How long have you been with your BF and why don't your parents approve of him or meeting him?

[Sutopa]

Almost 3 years and my parents are not liking him as my lifepartner as we are same in age and classmates. 

[ShySoul]

How old are you? Do you live with your parents?

As long as and him are adults and can handle all the responsibilities that come with being adults together, then it doesn't matter what your parents think. This is your life and your partner, not theirs. They have every right to voice their concerns. They don't have to be happy about it. And you should try to treat them with respect and listen to what they say. But it's ultimately going to be up to you and your partner to decide what is right for you.

I would calmly and respectfully tell them that you understand they aren't happy about it, but that you and boyfriend want to discuss everything and see if something can be worked out that will make everyone feel better. You are respecting them while still asking to have your voice heard as well. There is a chance you could address whatever issues they seem to have with him, calming their fears. And it might even give the two of you something to think about so you are sure you are ready for that step. Just try to keep everything civil and not let it devolve into bickering and fighting as that won't help anyone.

[MissCanuck]

Why don't your parents approve of him?

How old are both of you? 

[Sutopa]

24

[Batya33]

6 hours ago, Sutopa said:

What to do when my bf wanting to meet with or talk with my parents, but my parents are not approving it and don’t even want to talk?

You tell him - my parents are not supportive of my choice in a romantic partner so I don't want to put you through meeting them.

If I were your boyfriend I would then end it unless there was a way to resolve this but that is because I am a person who found immediate family very important in  the choice of a life partner.  Other people don't care or don't care as much. If  your boyfriend wants to meet them it sounds like he does care and he is entitled to care.  

Are you willing to cut ties with your parents and choose your boyfriend? Are you sure their disapproval is simply based on age/classmate status?

[ShySoul]

What kind of people are your parents? Do they tend to judge others? Are they overly cautious? Could they have a valid reason for not wanting this union? Are they overall supportive or are they the kind to find criticism and fault with things?

How is your relationship with them otherwise? Is it solid and you don't want to mess it up over this one thing? Or are their other issues?

Good parents should want their child to be happy. They should want someone who genuinely cares for and loves the child. They should also recognize their childs freedom to make their own choices, even if they wouldn't do it themselves. They wouldn't put their child in a position of having to choose. Likewise, neither should your partner.

I'd look at who is causing the problems versus who is trying to resolve them. Who is the one showing you more love and respect? 

It is your life and your choice. You should do what will make you happiest. Sorry you're in this position.

[MissCanuck]

4 hours ago, Sutopa said:

24

And this question?:

8 hours ago, MissCanuck said:

Why don't your parents approve of him?

 

[rainbowsandroses]

9 hours ago, Sutopa said:

Almost 3 years and my parents are not liking him as my lifepartner as we are same in age and classmates. 

Okay again, why don't your parents approve of him as a life partner?  

So what if you're the same age and classmates?  That's not a valid reason to not approve of someone.

What's really going on?  We need more context.

For example, is he a different religion?  Is this a same-sex relationship?  

How old are both of you?  

In any event, if your parents disapprove and don't want to meet him, there is not much you can do unfortunately.

It's a shame because it will definitely drive a wedge between you and your parents and eventually between you and your boyfriend.

My guess is your parents are hoping for the latter.

 

 

[TeeDee]

18 hours ago, Sutopa said:

What to do when my bf wanting to meet with or talk with my parents, but my parents are not approving it and don’t even want to talk?

You are 24.  You don't need their approval but it would be nice to have. 

You best start sticking up for him & forcing the issue.  Highlight all of his good qualities & help them to see him in a better light.  

Enlist the help of an older adult they respect who has meet your BF who can attest to his suitability.