No results with online dating - advice

[waldglory]

I'm male 32, am 6ft tall, make 6 figure income net, very muscular and have over 6 inch penis size (6.5 inches). So technically I have all the tools that society says would help men with attracting women.

 

I started lifting weights from early age of 17 so I've had muscles all my life but never been in any romantic relationship (girlfriend).

 

I started seeing escorts from an early age of 18 out of curiosity and it became a habit. The good thing is I've had sex with lots of really good looking women in this way, many of them have called me hot or given me compliments on my body.

So as I was seeing escorts I never really bothered with any dating. I tried online dating and don't get any results.

It could be that I only like white women and I am a British Indian man, although all the escorts I've had sex with have been white women and quite a few have been attracted to me.

 

I think online dating is best suited for white men. In terms of hobbies I lift weights every week, have been doing that for 15 yrs. I do yoga sometimes but very small classes and no real opportunity to communicate with women there, all in a rush.

 

I do salsa/bachata classes but nothing materialised there, at least can improve my dancing.

I don't drink and bars and clubs are not my scene. I have even tried cold approaching women in supermarkets before and got a few numbers but nothing happened, they mostly ghost.

 

I am thinking the only solution is to keep increasing my income to higher and higher levels to say 300-400k in a year and then become a sugar daddy.

 

That way I guess you have the power to choose the desirable women you want and work and arrangement out.

 

It is sad though as I see men that I seem to be inferior to me in relationships with women and I never understand it.

 

The long term isolation has made me very misognystic and develop some hatred towards women. I am also very narcissistic as a result of isolation to some degree and having a me against the world type mentality with something to prove.

 

Narcissism can be a good trait though for achieving things as if you have a big ego you have to achieve more to satisfy it. It is no wonder some of the most successful people in the world are narcissistic, Elon musk is an example as well.

 

Any help and advice would be appreciated. 

[ShySoul]

53 minutes ago, waldglory said:

The long term isolation has made me very misognystic and develop some hatred towards women. I am also very narcissistic as a result of isolation to some degree and having a me against the world type mentality with something to prove.

Assuming you are being serious about this, perhaps this is the problem? 

Why would a woman choose to be with a man who openly states that he hates them? Why would anyone want to be with someone who describes themselves as a narcissis and feels the need to inflate their own ego while labeling others as inferior? How can you trust someone who brags about their sexual conquests and how they have been with loads of "hot" women? 

Your priorities are backwards. Love, dating, relationships... those aren't dependent on money or power. As you've discovered, you can have tons of money, a great physical physique, lots of sex, and yet still be lonely. In the ends the one muscle that matters most is the heart. Compassion, kindness, honesty, trustworthiness, a sense of humor, willingness to be there for the other person - those are the kinds of qualties that make a relationship.

As long as you are focused on physical or material things, nothing will stick. As long as you carry feelings of hatred towards others, you will push people away. And yes, there might be some who will go along with it. But do you really want to say that the only way you can get someone to be with you is to pay them? Or do you ultimately want more?

Oh, and I can't remember the last time I heard someone say anything good about Elon Musk. He might be wealthy and "successful" but he's far from the worlds most popular person. He's had multiple marriages, but also multiple divorces. Maybe there's more to a successful relationship then money, power, and influence?

[lostandhurt]

Wow where to start.

Your thread is full of statements that tell you why you are getting nowhere with women.  I was thinking of multi quoting each one but for the sake of making this easy.  Re-read your whole thread several times as an outsider and then tell us what you see.

 If you are paying a woman to have sex with you then you cannot take anything  they say seriously so let those comments go.

 I big dose of humble pie would help right off the bat.  Then some self reflection on your view of women as a whole.  Since you have not really been close to a woman that you were not paying I will give you a secret.  Women can sense and see all the negative traits you listed.  I know you listed them as positives but they really are not. In your first sentence you stated your income and penis size like that is the most important part of who you are.  Women want way more than that.

 You have a lot to learn to be successful in dating but all those years of using prostitutes has skewed your views and habits so you need to unlearn all that and start fresh.

Lost

[poorlittlefish]

Women are not going to know (or care) about your penis size until they're actually in bed with you. To get to that point, your personality, values and interests will be (or should be, for anyone decent) the most important thing. Please place less value on physical and material attributes and work more on being a nice person with healthy attitudes. 

Also in relation to health, most women would probably feel uncomfortable with your past sexual history. Keep it to yourself and get yourself tested before you get intimate with anyone you are interested in. 

[Kwothe28]

Cant believe you boomers fall for bait so obvious. If he is really all that "douschy" some woman would at least like him lol

[Capricorn3]

3 hours ago, waldglory said:

It is sad though as I see men that I seem to be inferior to me in relationships with women and I never understand it.

The long term isolation has made me very misognystic and develop some hatred towards women. I am also very narcissistic as a result of isolation to some degree and having a me against the world type mentality with something to prove.

Narcissism can be a good trait though for achieving things as if you have a big ego you have to achieve more to satisfy it.

When reading your post several times I can see why you get no results with dating.  The men who you deem to be "inferior" but yet in relationships are probably successful because they do not display narcissistic misogynistic hatred towards women.   Also, your very first opening sentence was already off-putting - can you guess why?

Showing off and bragging is also not very appealing to most people and just because you have "lots of big muscles" doesn't automatically mean that you will attract all women - (speaking for myself only, I can't stand the muscle gym rat look, I find it gross).

Some self-reflection might go a long way because all the things you think are important, are not.  Carry on the way you are and you'll continue to have zero success.

[waldglory]

4 hours ago, lostandhurt said:

Wow where to start.

Your thread is full of statements that tell you why you are getting nowhere with women.  I was thinking of multi quoting each one but for the sake of making this easy.  Re-read your whole thread several times as an outsider and then tell us what you see.

 If you are paying a woman to have sex with you then you cannot take anything  they say seriously so let those comments go.

 I big dose of humble pie would help right off the bat.  Then some self reflection on your view of women as a whole.  Since you have not really been close to a woman that you were not paying I will give you a secret.  Women can sense and see all the negative traits you listed.  I know you listed them as positives but they really are not. In your first sentence you stated your income and penis size like that is the most important part of who you are.  Women want way more than that.

 You have a lot to learn to be successful in dating but all those years of using prostitutes has skewed your views and habits so you need to unlearn all that and start fresh.

Lost

I don't really think women are that clever though. Some women are infatuated with serial killers and highly narcissistic men as well. 

 

So I don't really think that women can sense much. 

[Andrina]

2 hours ago, waldglory said:

I don't really think women are that clever though. Some women are infatuated with serial killers and highly narcissistic men as well. 

 

So I don't really think that women can sense much. 

Perhaps mentally off, dysfunctional women go for that. Apparently, you've been surrounded by emotionally healthy women who can intuit ugly thoughts and also steer clear of men who pay for sex. You don't have to voice what you're all about when women sense by your vibes to stay far, far away.

[lostandhurt]

5 hours ago, waldglory said:

So I don't really think that women can sense much. 

And here is your problem.  Women, real unpaid women have years of experience with guys like you and can spot you a mile away and they want nothing to do with an ego driven narcissist.

 Sure there are broken people out there that are drawn to other broken people but is that what you want?  Some ex stripper struggling to get through life that thinks all she deserves is someone that does not respect her?

The color of your skin or nationality has very little to do with your lack of results in dating.  Describe what your dating profile looks like and what you wrote.  We may be able to help you in that regard but your attitude really needs a make over.  Not saying that to be mean, just factual.

Lost

[catfeeder]

I can't imagine the problem. If your profile is anything like your post, I'd be all over that.

[TeeDee]

My advice:  get off on line dating.  It's a good idea in theory but my experience was that it is filled with people who have no in person social skills.   Stay away from the escorts.  They are warping your view of what meaningful social interaction looks like.  A real relationship is not transactional.  

The fact that you see women as inferior bleeds through your interactions with them.  Women sense more than you give us credit for.  Nobody wants to be with a man who thinks she's less than.  

You are a successful person so look in your industry.  Go to conventions, networking events, chamber of commerce meetings, continuing education opportunities & see who is around there.   Perhaps if you find a woman who earns as much or more than you, she will see the value in her. 

Tell everyone you know that you would like to meet somebody.  For all you know, your mother's work BFF has a niece that would be perfect for you or your buddy's GF's college roommate would be a great fit.  Your circle doesn't know to look (& screen) for you if you don't ask for help.  Your ego probably works against you here because you don't want anybody to know there is something you are not succeeding at.  

Get more involved with groups that do things you are passionate about:  art, saving the planet, politics, whatever.  Just go in person & meet people.   If you change your circle to include people you admire, perhaps that will help you mitigate the idea that you are better than everyone.  

[MissCanuck]

On 6/7/2024 at 8:56 AM, Kwothe28 said:

fall for bait so obvious. 

Exactly my thoughts. 

This is an obvious troll post. 

[ShySoul]

On 6/7/2024 at 2:50 AM, waldglory said:

I don't really think women are that clever though. Some women are infatuated with serial killers and highly narcissistic men as well. 

So I don't really think that women can sense much.

And yet women are clever enough to sense your attitude and go in the opposite direction. And women here are clever enough to point out how illogical your comments are. 

And yes, I'm pretty sure this is a troll. But if he wants to dish it out, he should be prepared to read how sad he sounds.