Introverted guy is so confusing

[JuJubee33]

Hey guys I am new to posting so I ask you to please help me post this on the right board... anyway... I have a crush on an introverted man at my work... we do not work together in the same department and only see each other on breaks so work isn't an issue...

He had been grabbing things from me and letting his fingers graze my hand and the prolonged eye contact is like so exciting lol he will come from a separate building to get me when its break time and always walks me back there after breaks... his whole face smiles when he sees me as does mine when i see him. I started noticing this as did coworkers who are rooting for me. We do not spend a lot of ttime alone together as we dont talk outside work. When we are able to take a break together alone we cannot stop talking and its awesome. He has started talking to me quietly when others are with us on break. He is always so sweet. We have both admitted to each other that we have interest. However, I am ready lol im ready to hang out outside of work and get even closer... he kissed me once and has not again but continues the touching, talking, and smiling. He isn't a text or phone call guy outside work so he doesn't text back all the time but has started to acknowledge I sent him a message when we are at work. I know he's single and is shy... but so am I lol let's do this already UGH what do I do. Idk if he likes me or what I truly want him too... I need another kiss lol

[Wiseman2]

4 minutes ago, JuJubee33 said:

 only see each other on breaks  I am ready. im ready to hang out outside of work and get even closer... he kissed me once 

Sorry this is happening. Did he kiss you during work hours? Do you feel this is sexual harassment? Please go to work and be professional. Perhaps he doesn't date coworkers. However you mentioned that you're not ready to date. So how exactly would you like to move forward beyond inappropriate flirting at the workplace?  Has he asked you out?

[Batya33]

He doesn’t seem shy at all when it comes to showing sexual interest and interest in you. I originally met my very shy husband at work. We also worked in different departments. After meeting three times at work events he called and asked me to lunch. We NEVER flirted at work. Or anything like that. We kissed on our 4th date I think. Why not simply ask him to grab lunch during the work day ??

[Coily]

How old are you two?

I think in a way he has told himself that you two are seeing each other, and hasn't realized that he hasn't truly communicated that with you. You should ask him where he likes to go for dinner out, and if he will take you there. You will probably have to initiate some, as in the current dating climate he his getting mixed messages about what he should do. And it's okay to initiate.

[Kwothe28]

1. He is not really introverted. Introverted people dont really go around and kiss their coworkers.

2. Dating somebody from work is a bad idea overall as if things go awry, you still have to see that person every single day. So do be careful with that.

[Andrina]

2 hours ago, JuJubee33 said:

He had been grabbing things from me and letting his fingers graze my hand and the prolonged eye contac

This actually sounds creepy to me. Where you're getting that he's introverted and shy, I don't know, with everything you described. 

Logically, when you've both expressed your "interest" in one another, the next step would be for him to ask you out. The fact that he hasn't means one of two things:

1. That he's not single as you assume or have heard, and it's also likely the reason he can't freely communicate by phone after work hours.

2. He's single but is just not that into you. He likes the fact you have a crush on him, and it gives the work day an extra spark, but he will never ask you on a date.

Don't blame what you assume as "shyness" as the reason he's not asking you out. Kissing you and saying he has interest shows he bold enough to do that, and he'd especially have no anxiety about you accepting since you kissed him back and told him of your interest.

Don't let yourself be the mouse the cat has fun batting around. Get your answer by asking him to meet outside of work. If he hems and haws, has excuses and delays when this will happen, etc., he's not a good dating prospect, so it's time to end your socializing with him at work. Because when you're emotionally bonded to an unavailable man, it will prevent you from being mentally available for better dating prospects. If he happens to say yes, you will move to the next level, which is what you want. Let us know how it goes.

2 hours ago, JuJubee33 said:

However, I am ready lol im ready to hang out outside of work and get even closer... he kissed me once and has not again but continues the touching, talking, and smiling. He isn't a text or phone call guy outside work so he doesn't text back all the time but has started to acknowledge I sent him a message when we are at work. I know he's single and is shy

[Jaunty]

Yeah that's not "introverted."  Well, I suppose he might be introverted but he's practically a masher insofar as how he's coming on strong.  That kind of thing at work is extremely forward.  It's weird that he's ONLY macking on you at work, and he only acknowledges your texts at work as well.  

It's possible that he has a girlfriend. 

Since he's already acting like you are his girlfriend at work, though, you might as well just bite the bullet and ask him out yourself.  If he turns you down  you will need to face that he's not really available and is just playing around.  Hope it goes your way!

 

[catfeeder]

If I can’t understand what you want from your post, then how is he supposed to know?

If you two are talking so much, why not just ask him?

[rainbowsandroses]

3 hours ago, JuJubee33 said:

We have both admitted to each other that we have interest.

I'm curious about this comment. 

When did this "admission of interest" take place and in what context?  

And why if you both admitted to having interest (I presume interest in each orher?) neither of you took the conversation further like asking for a date?  Which is what people typically do when they have interest and admitting it to each other. 

Make sure you're not projecting your feelings on to him and reading into things he says and does that aren't actually there.  Which is quite easy to do and happens when we really like someone, I've done it myself.  

Agree with others, he's no introvert and curious why you believe he is.  Even assuming he is, introverted men are still capable of asking a women out when interested. 

The whole things sounds odd imo, and I can't shake this feeling he may be toying with you a bit.  I hope I'm wrong.

In any event, since this is your workplace and frankly it doesn't matter if you're in different departments or not, I would dial this back and stop indulging this guy's whimsies.

Just my take. 

Good luck.