I am quite certain that my soulmate and I have crossed paths, but she has kids and man.

[Batya33]

3 minutes ago, Citizen89 said:

Someone asked if other women at work flirts with me.

The answer is no. And you know what else.. they talk about their husbands...

Yes some people reference their spouses at work and some don't.  Depends on context.  I actually avoid it and avoid mentioning my child unless I have to to explain an absence.  I want to be seen as an independent person who is there to work.

[MissCanuck]

When was your last relationship? 

[Citizen89]

Just now, Batya33 said:

Crushes and flings aren't set in stone either -and here you are asking whether you'll be a stepdad? So you're thinking about this far in the future thing and yet at the same time she' hankering to throw away her marriage because you made eyes at her and had a somewhat personal convo with her? 

Let's say she got a little bit excited and was very emotionally available. She didn't react the way taken women usually do. Taken women usually distance themselves somehow. You can't "get to them". They sort of make it impossible to form chemistry at any deep level. Another word for it is that they act boring..

[Batya33]

1 minute ago, Citizen89 said:

Let's say she got a little bit excited and was very emotionally available. She didn't react the way taken women usually do. Taken women usually distance themselves somehow. You can't "get to them". They sort of make it impossible to form chemistry at any deep level. Another word for it is that they act boring..

She was available to flirt at work when you interacted with her.  Nothing to do with fancy "emotionally available'.  Are you emotionally available for a real relationship? Chasing after married women and fantasizing to this extent is inconsistent with that.

[Citizen89]

1 minute ago, Batya33 said:

She was available to flirt at work when you interacted with her.  Nothing to do with fancy "emotionally available'.  Are you emotionally available for a real relationship? Chasing after married women and fantasizing to this extent is inconsistent with that.

I didn't know she was in a relationship when we first talked for 75 mins.

[redswim30]

8 minutes ago, Citizen89 said:

I didn't know she was in a relationship when we first talked for 75 mins.

So what?  This means nothing.   You are reading WAY too much into extremely casual interactions. 

I'm married and I don't bring up my husband to co-workers I barely know.  Not because I'm unhappy, just because I like to keep my private life private. 

[Citizen89]

Just now, redswim30 said:

So what?  This means nothing.   You are reading WAY too much into extremely casual interactions. 

I'm married and I don't bring up my husband to co-workers I barely know.  Not because I'm unhappy, just because I like to keep my private life private. 

It's not the lack of mention, it was her reactions to me. She just got way too happy and excited for a woman who's married. I've met countless women in relationships and it's pretty dead chemistry between us. 

[boltnrun]

1 hour ago, Citizen89 said:

Other people have formed the impression that she likes me based on her account of me. We will see each other outside of work in a months time.

Alone.  Not a get together with coworkers or a company event.  

1 hour ago, Citizen89 said:

We have been on the phone for non romantic reasons. She told me there that she has a kid. She didn't actually tell me that she has a husband even there.. but other people have. I didn't know she had two kids either, but it wasn't relevant to the conversation..

Btw, even on the phone it feels incredibly strange with her. Same vibe as face to face. Like this person means something to me. Our first introduction was on the phone and I instantly felt a connection. Her voice isn't sexy or anything. pretty regular.

On your personal phones?  Or at work?

So the answers to all my questions is "no".  I figured as much.

I guess when she never leaves her husband (or she does but doesn't get involved with you) or months and months go by with nothing more than "twirling eyes" and your own interpretations of her actions it might become clear to you.  But a man like you who has many, many women falling in love with him should have no trouble finding someone else.

Look, we're trying to get you to see reality.  But you don't seem interested in reality.  So unfortunately things will play out.  But please do not bother this woman.   She's most likely at work to work, not to have illicit affairs with coworkers.

[Citizen89]

Just now, boltnrun said:

Alone.  Not a get together with coworkers or a company event.  

On your personal phones?  Or at work?

So the answers to all my questions is "no".  I figured as much.

I guess when she never leaves her husband (or she does but doesn't get involved with you) or months and months go by with nothing more than "twirling eyes" and your own interpretations of her actions it might become clear to you.  But a man like you who has many, many women falling in love with him should have no trouble finding someone else.

Look, we're trying to get you to see reality.  But you don't seem interested in reality.  So unfortunately things will play out.  But please do not bother this woman.   She's most likely at work to work, not to have illicit affairs with coworkers.

You weren't there.

[Citizen89]

Just now, boltnrun said:

Alone.  Not a get together with coworkers or a company event.  

On your personal phones?  Or at work?

So the answers to all my questions is "no".  I figured as much.

I guess when she never leaves her husband (or she does but doesn't get involved with you) or months and months go by with nothing more than "twirling eyes" and your own interpretations of her actions it might become clear to you.  But a man like you who has many, many women falling in love with him should have no trouble finding someone else.

Look, we're trying to get you to see reality.  But you don't seem interested in reality.  So unfortunately things will play out.  But please do not bother this woman.   She's most likely at work to work, not to have illicit affairs with coworkers.

She is the one stopping me to flirt. I like how you women all view yourselves as prizes, and that I couldn't possibly attract a woman. Same reply everywhere. Get a grip. Men are also attractive. 

[SherrySher]

8 hours ago, Citizen89 said:

There's a lot of things to unpack. Suffice to say, our chemistry was like no other. I didn't think about it at first, but the more I looked into her eyes, the more I raised suspicions in my mind that this is indeed my other half.

She ultimately went off in the conversation and was super energetic. I find out later that she has two kids and a husband. She has despite this sent out several signals that she wants out and is now actively flirting with me.

Our next meeting she treated me like her meta boyfriend and our romance just increases the more we see each other, and attraction. Even though the words are neutral, it's the way they are said.. and her demeanor. 

Her husband? Never mentions him. If I ask about her personal she just replies "fine". Looks sad when doing so.

What makes this tricky is that she has two small kids, so I'm asking the good folks in here what that means for me, if anything. Will I be part of that?

She has been with her husband for over 10 years.

Discussion: Can the kids be kept separate from this mega romance that blossomed? I don't mind kids at all, it's more the fact that their ages are critical.

If she was meant for you, she wouldn't have a husband.

The only way to date her, would be to become a home wrecker and by force.

That alone should tell you that she's not meant for you.

Anything meant for you, won't be unavailable or involve hurting others.

[Citizen89]

Just now, SherrySher said:

If she was meant for you, she wouldn't have a husband.

The only way to date her, would be to become a home wrecker and by force.

That alone should tell you that she's not meant for you.

Anything meant for you, won't be unavailable or involve hurting others.

Not true. Different people  show up to teach life lessons. The nature of the relationship has nothing to do with it. Divine soulmates aren't always meant to be together in every incarnation or even meet each other. In this case, she seems receptive to the idea...

 

 

[boltnrun]

28 minutes ago, Citizen89 said:

She is the one stopping me to flirt. I like how you women all view yourselves as prizes, and that I couldn't possibly attract a woman. Same reply everywhere. Get a grip. Men are also attractive. 

What? Who said that? 

Well, you have dug in your heels so I guess enjoy your fantasy. But please do not bother that woman. If she leaves her husband and wants to date you she'll let you know. 

[Citizen89]

Just now, boltnrun said:

What? Who said that? 

Well, you have dug in your heels so I guess enjoy your fantasy. But please do not bother that woman. If she leaves her husband and wants to date you she'll let you know. 

She already has Not only by stopping me to chat and flirt  but.... First time we met... No discernible perfume. second time we met.. no discernible perfume.

My relationship status gets official:  third meeting: no wedding ring, highly detectable (and seductive) perfume on her.

 

 

[Batya33]

5 minutes ago, Citizen89 said:

She already has Not only by stopping me to chat and flirt  but.... First time we met... No discernible perfume. second time we met.. no discernible perfume.

My relationship status gets official:  third meeting: no wedding ring, highly detectable (and seductive) perfume on her.

 

 

LOL sounds like your scentmate! I think at some point you will want to have a romantic relationship with a single, available person -that will be harder than this fantasy but worth it. It's fine if you don't but I get the sense  you do but it's easier to fantasize.

[Citizen89]

Just now, Batya33 said:

LOL sounds like your scentmate! I think at some point you will want to have a romantic relationship with a single, available person -that will be harder than this fantasy but worth it. It's fine if you don't but I get the sense  you do but it's easier to fantasize.

It takes a month for a divorce to register. You don't know if she filed it. 

[boltnrun]

7 minutes ago, Citizen89 said:

My relationship status gets official: 

According to you. If you two are officially in a relationship how come you don't speak outside of work? Why don't the two of you have dinner together? Why no texts or emails exchanged outside of work? 

I wonder if she's aware she's 'officially' in a relationship with you. I doubt it.

You are living in a fantasy. Why isn't real life appealing to you? 

[boltnrun]

Just now, Citizen89 said:

It takes a month for a divorce to register. You don't know if she filed it. 

Neither do you.

If you're "officially" in a relationship with her how come you have no idea if she has filed or even intends to divorce her husband?

[Citizen89]

Just now, boltnrun said:

According to you. If you two are officially in a relationship how come you don't speak outside of work? Why don't the two of you have dinner together? Why no texts or emails exchanged outside of work? 

I wonder if she's aware she's 'officially' in a relationship with you. I doubt it.

You are living in a fantasy. Why isn't real life appealing to you? 

I never said we are in a relationship, I said that my status as single reached her, and she suddenly started wearing perfume and chat me up to flirt with her body language. I'm not naive.

[Jaunty]

5 hours ago, Citizen89 said:

Yeah it's fine. What I want to know is IF that's going to happen. She has been with her husband 11 years. I would be surprised if the takes a hike and ditches the kids..

I will be surprised if she has any idea whatsoever that you think of the two of you as "soulmates," or, in fact, has any type of romantic interest in you. Sorry.

[Citizen89]

Just now, Jaunty said:

I will be surprised if she has any idea whatsoever that you think of the two of you as "soulmates," or, in fact, has any type of romantic interest in you. Sorry.

You don't need to apologize for not being there and having no clue.

[Citizen89]

2 minutes ago, Batya33 said:

LOL sounds like your scentmate! 

Of course my soulmate knows what turns me on..

[boltnrun]

OK.

Your delusions are deep seeded and no amount of logic is going to break through.

I just hope you don't harass or bother this coworker. She's just there doing her job and is unlikely to be there looking for men to have affairs with.

[Citizen89]

Just now, boltnrun said:

OK.

Your delusions are deep seeded and no amount of logic is going to break through.

I just hope you don't harass or bother this coworker. She's just there doing her job and is unlikely to be there looking for men to have affairs with.

She stopped me to flirt. She's harassing me by your definition.

[Jaunty]

2 minutes ago, Citizen89 said:

She stopped me to flirt. She's harassing me by your definition.

There was not flirting.  You are actually delusional, or a super bored person trolling the relationship sites as a recreational activity.