He prioritises his female friends over me

[Keiraggg]

I was seeing someone for almost a month n we met up about 5 times and I thought he was really sweet n matured, he was 38 and I was 25. He told me he was a relationship guy. Until something happened, we were supposed to meetup over fri/next weekend but he cancelled cause he wanted to catch up with his friends that he haven’t met for a long time n I was fine with that. Fri night came n I was drinking with my friends and he texted me at 1am plus telling me to meet him n his friends at a party event so I went to find him n he was with two female friends, I felt a little bit threatened but I did greeted them n wasn’t particularly interested in mingling with them and was focusing on my date, we left the place after like 5 mins and the two girls left to another club in a cab without us and my date told me his friends think I was being a b**** to them which got me baffled cause we only seen each other for less than 10mins and they straight up judge me for being unfriendly:/ n he straight up sided with them when I ask for his humble opinion n his reasoning was he knew them for 5 years . N I did question him why did he ask me to meet him so late at night and not during the start to meet his friends n he told me I was being dramatic for putting this on him when I express my concern that am I being too convenient and like a back burner for his plans n he tell me to go home .N he said he will prioritize meeting his friends over me just because he knew them a lot longer n he knew me only for a month. It completely crash me and it was a weird confusing space n I didn’t know what to do, I ended up wanting to end connection with him and so I did by sending him a long text message next day and saying we are better off as friends, and he unfollowed me and removed me as follower on Instagram. And when I asked him why did he do that, he said I am a great person really no tension, I only followed people that I knew on Instagram :/

[Cherylyn]

In your mind, say, "Good riddance!"  He doesn't sound like 'Mr. Dream Guy' at all.  ☹️

[Batya33]

He's not just "prioritizing" - he is acting rude and you're also not valuing yourself -meeting up with someone in the middle of the night when you're an afterthought - he cancels and then you go running to meet him at 1am-why? Then he gossips about what they told him -their negative assessment of you.  This is not a "really sweet" person.  Next time know your worth - when you are first getting to know someone plan and go on proper dates -don't be that woman who says how high should I jump when a new man calls to meet up at some event at 1am.

[Kwothe28]

I would question if somebody is "relationship guy" if he is 38, into clubbing, and calls you late at night to join him at the club with his two "friends" instead of organizing a proper date just for you two. People at the start can tell you all kinds of things about themselves so they will look better in your eyes. In reality, they sometimes wouldnt be any of those stuff they say.

For example, your man is a "player". Middle aged but still into clubbing because that is probably how he chases younger women, surrounds himselfs with women and doesnt care to the point of being rude because he can "afford" to be rude when, no offense, one woman like you probably comes to him every week. Now that you are gone he would chase another one at the club or some of his "friends" will fill in the role. Its OK, you are still young, but you should recognize stuff like that and know what to expect from a guys like that.

You did good by breaking things up, just take it as a lesson and watch better next time when you meet somebody like that. 

[Wiseman2]

14 hours ago, Keiraggg said:

 I ended up wanting to end connection with him and so I did by sending him a long text message next day and saying we are better off as friends, 

You did the right thing ending it. You're not compatible. This is an inordinate amount of drama for 5 dates. Refocus your energy on someone whose lifestyle is more compatible with yours. Don't try to stay friends. You don't get along and he's already calling you derogatory names.

[Lambert]

Consider this a blessing and a good lesson.

1. Do not meet people that invite you out at 1 am. 

2. don't tolerate guys that give you excuse or blame you for being too sensitive when you try to explain how you feel.  

3. just because someone tells you they are "relationship guy" or anything else doesn't make it true.  A user and liar is not going to say, "oh and btw the way I am super selfish and a liar."

Wise up, girlfriend and make better choices.  

[Coily]

This clown has shown you who he really is, a dirtbag. He viewed you more as a hot play thing rather than someone to have a relationship with. Definitely use him as a gauge to measure the actions of other men, he is the bottom rung.

[Andrina]

Cancelling a date with you because he hasn't seen friends in a while. Like, he couldn't make plans with them the following week, a mere seven days away?

He sounds emotionally stunted with everything you've written. On one hand, you have some self-worth to end things. However, I think you'd do yourself a service to boost your self-love even more, because if it was at a decent level, you would have dumped him when he cancelled on you to make those unnecessary alternative plans. And that you you mentioned staying friends when he'd shown you what a jerk he is. If he doesn't even have the sense to not pass on hurtful info, that his friends criticized you, he's not friend material. There's a strong possibility he meant to hurt you as well, so learning to recognize dangerous traits in a person is something you should strive to improve for your own well-being.

Take care.

[smackie9]

I'm gonna go against the grain because I have experienced the receiving end of a jealous gf/date. Anyone for any reason is allowed to cancel a date. If it was a planned vacation, a birthday/or celebration of some kind, ya sure that is inconsiderate. You only have had 5 dates, you are not BF/GF. You are just dating. He really wanted for you to meet them and hang out, that's why he called you up. You could have said no, and told him how you felt the next time you saw him. And why didn't you?

Your words in your post speaks volumes of the impression you gave those two friends. You felt a little threatened. Girl they felt that vibe, especially when you proceeded to just focus on your date. You made it known you had no interest in them, and they felt snubbed. Yes those girls were judgey, I totally agree they could have used better words, but I don't blame them for their response tho. 

He ditched you like a hot potato because it's most likely he has had experienced jealous GFs, dates. Sounded he's quite jaded by the whole thing from those experiences... just a guess tho. Yes he could have handled it better too...in fact all of you could have handled it better. 

My reasoning is because I had this happen to me where the chick would turn their back to me/ignore me, or flash a subtle dirty look, put space between me their BF. It's insulting that they think of ME that way, that they feel threatened by me jst because I'm a woman. So there are a few perspectives going on here and I'm giving you theirs. 

Maybe next time be more friendly, gracious, instead of going through the motions. Do your best to set a good impression instead of playing into those green feelings.