Today I’m the box of nitro

[catfeeder]

I see and appreciate your struggle to hear the comments rather than automatically dismiss them, and it's natural for defense to be our default reaction to disagreements. 

It's all okay. Support is not an all-or-nothing deal. Sometimes it p's us off.

This is the stuff of experiences that not only teach each of us, but these outcomes position us to best help the next person through it. And you will be that person for the next person you care about who can't see their own blind spot.

It's easy to get stuck on the one quick moment of a guy being smug with you--I get that.

But it's not the problem. It's a symptom of a larger problem, and it might be helpful to view that guy through the lens of a messenger who 'life conspired' to send you. He represents the finger-wagging neighbor who yells to all of the kids, 'Sure, it's fun and games until somebody gets hurt!"

Then Johnny gets a stick in his eye because he didn't heed the warning.

If your fevered panic in the mall was representative of how you drove behind the wheel, you can possibly put those pieces together and understand that this is NOT about the guy. It's about your need to slow down and heed the rights of others who are just living their lives and NOT imposing aggression on others in public places--because that is NOT acceptable--because someone CAN be harmed by that, despite your intentions.

Warnings first come in whispers. Then they come in barriers. Then they come with a sledgehammer.

Heed the warning, and avoid needing a sledgehammer to alter your life FOR you.

Head high--and we ARE on your side.

[Jibralta]

This thread has inspired me to plan better. When I came home at lunch, I was vegging out reading it. Then I got to this point:

7 hours ago, DancingFool said:

Hard to bond when you arrive an emotional mess and completely frazzled.

and thought, huh.

Then I got up and wrapped some gifts. Then I made some salad dressing and balanced the rest of my check book--all small things that I keep putting off.

Your ordeal reminded me of what happens when I let them accumulate! 

[1a1a]

Plenty of scope for self improvement at least. (I mean there’s a path forward and that’s way better than being stuck). 
 

Thank you everyone.