Craving male attention

[Batya33]

4 minutes ago, kim42 said:

Thanks Batya, I'll try to remember this, it's really hard to talk to my father about anything related to emotions, I gave up a long time ago.  

I understand and you don't have to.  I wasn't close with my father although I forgave him for a lot later in life.  But I wouldn't talk much about emotions simply make an observation like "when you say ___ I feel hurt"  No need to go further than that.  And yes you can choose not to engage at all -I get it!!

[lostandhurt]

14 hours ago, kim42 said:

Thank you Lost, I think I'm satisfied with how I look, I have some insecurities, just like everyone else I guess. I definitely feel more confident than before. 

I try not to talk about these things with my father anymore, I live in another country, and I see him once a year. We don't talk that much, and when we do, it's just basic things, usually about my work or something random. I once told him he has very little empathy, after he had said something mean to me, and he just thought I was overreacting. 

This is sad but wise.  He isn't going to change so why try?  Best to keep it cordial and neutral with him.  One day he will wonder why his daughter doesn't call...

This doesn't sound like a huge problem and even asking the question shows you are aware and reflective about your own motives and desires.  I think you are all good.

Do you think if you were in a committed relationship these "cravings" would disappear?

 

Lost

[Jibralta]

6 hours ago, lostandhurt said:

One day he will wonder why his daughter doesn't call...

Or maybe he won't. Some people never extricate themselves from their own BS. Just want to put that out there lest Kim42 gets her hopes up--this may be one that you have to love from afar.

As long as Kim42 remains aware of the situation, I think she will be ok.

[kim42]

I don't think ma father will ever change, I think I gradually accepted the situation as is. I used to be a little upset I was never daddy's little girl,  but it's okay now, I chose to focus on different things in my life.

Lost - I think being in a committed relationship would help me, whenever I had a boyfriend, I didn't feel the urge to flirt or seek male attention. However, I have a hard time letting someone in, after a few bad experiences, so recently I only had flings and 'situationships'. I met someone last year who I really liked but sadly he had a gf 🙁

[Jibralta]

13 minutes ago, kim42 said:

whenever I had a boyfriend, I didn't feel the urge to flirt or seek male attention.

That's a good sign, frankly.

If you were in a relationship and still seeking male attention, you should worry. 

A good barometer for any urge or habit is how it affects your relationships with other people. Something that causes strain or stress is something to question. 

Of course, the trick is being honest with yourself about whether something is causing a problem or not.