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Can someone give me clarity what this means ?


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After 4 months after the breakup, actually he walked away i went no contact. On Saturday i sent him a message "i miss you do you ?

He texted me back ... I miss you too. I didn't respond till last night when i said your still always on my mind and he responded -

Me too Darling you have a special power over me -  The breakup was my fault , he walked away hurt, i gave him space and he always in the past said i had power over him., iam not sure what this means.. confused. 

 

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1 minute ago, mg22 said:

On Saturday i sent him a message "i miss you do you ?

 he responded -

Me too Darling you have a special power over me

Do you want to reconcile? Why did you text him? Notice what he didn't say. And that is that he would like to see you or work things out.

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Hi Wiseman, I did respond saying hopefully we can meet sometime soon and he said " HOPEFULY" , i left it there, its to soon for him to text me back saying he wants me back, its been 4 months no contact. So i feel hopeful he may want me back and is thinking about how to come forward, the power i have over him i dont understand if its a good or bad thing ?

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What is your motivation to contact him after 4 months? There are reasons why you have dumped him. Are these reasons now resolved? 

If your contact is just because you are bored, lonely, horny: these are not good reasons to poke a healing wound. Be clear with yourself as to why you initiated this contact.

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6 minutes ago, East4 said:

What is your motivation to contact him after 4 months? There are reasons why you have dumped him. Are these reasons now resolved? 

If your contact is just because you are bored, lonely, horny: these are not good reasons to poke a healing wound. Be clear with yourself as to why you initiated this contact.

I didnt dump him, he left my house after a disagreement, my fault ! i tried to say sorry and had no response , i left it there... i do love him to death and i feel he loves me too, i reached out not out of boredom or sex, i reached out because i have strong feelings for him, so much i gave him his space and went no contact for 4 months.

When i reached out he answered me quickly , i dont want to pressure him to come to me, but it looks like he does want to come back, this happened last night where he said those things i wrote on my post. 

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Apology, I misunderstood, thought you dumped him.

Disagreements happen, you apologised. To me his decision to end the relationship over a fight, shows that his ego is more important for him than your relationship. He was ignoring you, thinking that you will chase him. But you went in NC, so you two entered a silence standstill. 

I think you have to thread carefully and not wear your heart on your sleeve (saying that you miss him). Let him come to you. If he does not: then you know he was either not that interested, or he is too prideful and his ego comes first.

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What was the disagreement about? Was it a reoccurring problem that never came to a resolution? Was it about a dealbreaker issue? How long did you date? All couples have arguments, so why did he walk away and not care when you went no contact?

Can't give proper advice. We don't know if you called him names. We don't know if he runs away from problems instead of caring enough to work on things. Don't know if the argument was the straw that broke the camel's back. 

I'll only say that on-again, off-again relationships usually signal that a relationship isn't the right one for you. People who care about each stick around and work on problems together, unless a dealbreaker is the culprit of the demise.

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Thank You East,  He does have a huge EGO and that being said he is very insecure. We where both best friends for about a year when he finally broke down and confessed he was in love with me. We started getting serious and he started acting nervous , when he is around me he acts shy, we are both in our 50's so we aren't getting any younger.  He always said he was afraid of me, that i had all the power in the relationship which i never understood.

Anyway i hope he has a change of heart and gives me another opportunity , i wont initiate anymore more contact, but he was always waiting for me to initiate plans, etc and even meeting up ! he confuses the hell out of me ! LOL

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4 minutes ago, Hollyj said:

What was the argument about?   How long had you dated?   Did you argue often?

Can you share more about the relationship?  Everything is too vague.

Holly, He walked into my house without notice , opened the door and i was sitting in the living room with one of our  mutual friends who dropped by because there was a storm outside and he waited for the storm to pass, he drives a motorcycle , both my kids where in the house and my daughter was in the living room as well, that took him by surprise that he stormed off and didn't want to talk to me anymore., the friend lives close by, and he has no interest in me at all ! 

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4 minutes ago, mg22 said:

Holly, He walked into my house without notice , opened the door and i was sitting in the living room with one of our  mutual friends who dropped by because there was a storm outside and he waited for the storm to pass, he drives a motorcycle , both my kids where in the house and my daughter was in the living room as well, that took him by surprise that he stormed off and didn't want to talk to me anymore., the friend lives close by, and he has no interest in me at all ! 

I'm sorry, but that doesn't make sense.   That is very strange.  

I am certain that this wasn't the first strange incident?  Why is he walking into your house?   How long did you date?

I also have to question why you would want to get re involved with someone like this.  He doesn't sound stable. 

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We where friends for 3 years, and dated for 1 year, our mutual friend introduced us, the friend knew he was coming over, but he showed up and stormed in and left mad, that's what happened, never before had we had any issues. 

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2 minutes ago, mg22 said:

He walked into my house without notice , opened the door and i was sitting in the living room with one of our  mutual friends who dropped by because there was a storm outside and he waited for the storm to pass, he drives a motorcycle ,  he stormed off and didn't want to talk to me anymore. 

It must have been tough to deal with someone so jealous, entitled and egotistical, no? Try not to mistake megalomania with insecurity or shyness. This seems like a brazen act and and ego explosion.

Add to that the vague passive-aggressive manner and talk. Almost like he wants to be an enigma. Frankly you dodged a bullet. he seems like way too much work.

 Don't let covid, loneliness and isolation forget what he was like.

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