I usually dnt have probs, but this one is real tough! HELP!

[DocZ]

Hey guys! I actually have been a member to this forum/site for a while now, but I actually never really posted much or anything at all. Anyways I have read over a couple of posts here and I am very confident that we have a lot of dating experts on this site. I hope I can also be of assistance in future.

 

Anyways to my problem... This a really long and complicated story so hang in there please!

Well where do I start. End of March my ex-gf broke up with me because I was treating her more like a friend rather than a gf, anyways thats not the point. Well I was feeling bad about the break up and it took about a month or so till i could get back on my feet again to go on with the normal life of looking for a new gf. Ever since I was getting support from a friend, who for the sake of confidentiality I will call Sarah.

Shortly after my break up and stance on getting a new gf, I gave up again because of my travel to Thailand for pretty much the entire summer. No point in getting a gf and letting her wait 3 months till i come back, I was like, lets wait till I get back.

The university in which I am going to has a campus in Thailand and in numerous other countries and we are offered free flights back and forth and easy set up for the program if we want to go to take a couple of courses there. Well Sarah and I have planned this since November of 2004 to go to Thailand. We both go to this same university and will be leaving in about a week.

Anyhow, now comes the confusing and complicated part. Sarah doesn't talk. Don't get the wrong idea, she is not dumb or anything. She can also hear fine. In fact she talks ONLY with her parents. She seems to have this psychological problem and hasn't ever talked to anyone since she first learned how to speak, except again, to her parents. So I have never heard her voice and yeah probably never will. So it is rather hard to communicate with her in terms of flirting and the dating topic. When I usually am talking with her, she has her mobile phone with her and she types up an answer or messages very fast. Or when she asks me something she does it with the messages on her phone and she just shows what she typed up to me. Its rather easy for her.

The point here is that I don't want to try and make her speak to me, thats not the point. I like her just the way she is and if she learns to overcome this problem and starts speaking with me, then thats cool. Anyways as of late, like since about two weeks I have been getting really strange signs. Just also to remind everyone, I am her "friend" and that for about 8 months now. You know how girls always categorize guys; once they are friends, they stay that most of the time and nothing more. Well in this case I am not tooo sure, i have always been interested in her, but I thought she was too good looking for me, you know not on the same level. Anyways people, in fact 3 good friends of mine have been telling that while we have all been going out, they have noticed that she has been looking at me more than normal or than she usually does. That it seems abnormal to them; that she could possibly be interested in me. Once my friends started telling me this, i have also myself been noticing some looks and just her nicer attitude towards me. And whenever i am talking with some girl on the phone or talking about a girl to another friend and she is around she always asks me who it was, who this girl is, which she never did since 2 or 3 weeks.

I talk to her on MSN most of the time and flirt with her online mostly since its easier for her, but its nothing compared to face to face flirting, but of course, she doesnt talk, so I cant get back the same response from her. I don't know if I, myself and my friends are witnessing a psychological effect or not, the fact that she is going to Thailand with me alone might give a more than what is really happening perception. Also possibly that I would really love it to be true, I might also see or feel things that may not really be there and I am making all this up to myself or making myself believe it. I am sure you guys understand what I mean, well some of you. haha

 

To summarize, I think, I am slowly about to get a crush on a girl I have been friends with for 8 months who doesn't talk to anyone but her parents and is possibly or possibly not showing signs of interest for me or she might just think that since her and I will be living together in a bungalow for 9 weeks at the university campus in Thailand, she thought it might be better to act nicer so not many problems arise between us there and I might not drop her off somewhere in Bangkok if i get angry at her. She would be lost, since she cant talk. haha, i know that is mean, sry..

 

So my question to you all is, how do I really find out whether she likes me or not by not directly asking her, which might then possibly ruin the entire Thailand trip which has been fully paid for and there is no cancellation possible? Do I wait it out and see what happens in Thailand? (Oh i didnt mention that. We chatted online once and I was askin her once why she is soo nice to me all of a sudden and she said you will see in Thailand. This of course could mean anything, it could mean that what I want it to mean, hmmm, grr.) Cause waiting 8 weeks can be a long time and waiting could just make it all worse... I am really stuck on this one and I know this is a rare situation since its hard to really have a conversation with her face to face. I am dazed and confused. Help me please

 

Your friend,

DocZ

[usied]

just wait it out ..you dont want to ruin your trip ...i know its hard to not be anxious when you could have something great within ur reach...hang in there...

[DN]

I agree -wait until Thailand. In the meantime continue to be friendly and helpful etc. Let her know by body language that you are interested but subtly - nothing overt.

[DocZ]

Thanks for the replies so far.. I know not many might be able to answer to this one, its a really tough situation, nevertheless thank you for those who did answer and I am still open for more. I won't be leaving till the 22nd of May!